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CF allotment thief thread no 4 - Babs’s dodgy solicitor and TV producers looking to cast for the role of Penfold?

990 replies

YaMuvva · 09/05/2024 15:24

New thread! Last one was here
www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/5049200-cf-allotment-thief-part-3-the-plot-thickens-and-auditions-begin-for-the-west-end-musical?page=38&reply=135136744

So a quick update.

DH dropped me off for my surgery this morning then dropped the kids at school before heading to the allotment. Babs was there gardening as were some other people on their own plots. All her crap was still there

DH went up and reminded her that she needs to be off the plot by the 20th. She said that she is awaiting advice from her solicitor to see if she can challenge us. She also said if the solicitor says she has to be off, she will be gone by the 20th but isn’t giving it up without checking if she has rights first. She did a fair bit of guilt tripping to DH about how she has spent 10 years being part of a community and having a hobby and she now has to give it all up but he held strong and told her, unless she comes back with a legitimate legal claim her property will be off the allotment by the 21st - wether it’s removed by her or by him.

However - enter Penfold stage right

Penfold is what we are calling the allotment neighbour who marched over from the other side of the plots (because that’s who he looks like). He started shouting at DH saying “You’re a bully! Fancy picking on an old lady and taking her allotment off her after all her years of hard work”. He pointed out it’s his allotment now and Penfold said that “just because your name is on a piece of paper it doesn’t give you the right to steal it off it’s rightful owner”. He then start saying “What do you know about gardening pretty boy? These allotments should be for real gardeners not pretty boys like you”

When DH told me this I laughed so hard I thought my stitches may burst 😂 DH IS very pretty but he’s also mid-40’s and hasn’t been called pretty in many many years. We are in semi-rural Yorkshire though and a man wearing a top that isn’t either blue black or white is considered a feminine.

When DH stated he does actually know about gardening, Penfold was all “Yeah right yeah right all you know about is putting your make up on” 🤣🤣 and said how these allotment owners have been around for decades he can’t just barge in and kick people out. DH said he was half expecting Penfold to say “this is a local allotment for local people”.

Then it was BABS of all people who told Penfold to STFU. Not quite those words but she said “oh do calm down Nigel”. The other plot owners just kept their heads down apparently. DH took off in the end but he is considering buying a Danger Mouse t-shirt to wear when he gardens. I’ve told him I can help him apply his make up 😂.

Anyway Babs’s words don’t exactly fill me with confidence but it’s better than flat out refusing to leave I suppose. I’m absolutely confident that legally she hasn’t a leg to stand on, but that doesn’t mean some dodgy solicitor won’t claim otherwise for a bit of easy money off her. Either way unless there is a claim that has legs (highly unlikely) DH will be round on the 21st to set up his stuff. PP were right about insane allotment owners - but we are just gonna have to lump it and not let Penfold ruin our time there.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
17
viques · 13/05/2024 18:14

YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 10:37

Technically she’s trespassing now, we are just being kind about it!
It really tricky because whilst we could physically throw her off the plot with reasonable force, she’s not committing a criminal act but if she claimed unnecessary force was used, we are. And nothing is stopping her from just coming back to the plot again and again. Worst case scenario is she spends her life refusing to budge as there are steps we can take but in reality we’d have very little power.

Will the solicitors be writing to you so that you have Sallys declaration in black and white? I hope they do because it wouldn’t harm to let Babs have a copy to share with Penfold, and you could also let other people know how sad you are that it has come to this, that two such long standing friends as Babs and Sally should have a friendship destroyed over Babs’ intransigence and refusal to accept the situation.

viques · 13/05/2024 18:14

Ps hope you are starting to feel a bit mended.

slore · 13/05/2024 18:24

I wish I'd suggested to you to record the phone calls with Sally! My mum's in a legal dispute and phone call recordings have come in very handy because they other party has not been truthful. It would have been good to have a recording of her saying it was Babs' plot for future compensation claims (when you're feeling better), at the very least for legal fees.

Definitely make Sally and Babs squirm. Also as suggested upthread get a letter from Sally's solicitor to show to Babs.

Babs needs to know that if Sally really intended for her to have this plot, she would have gifted it to her legally. Instead, Sally happily sold it along with her house.

godmum56 · 13/05/2024 18:45

Newestname002 · 13/05/2024 17:16

Stanley Tucci
Dwayne Johnson (The Rock)
Dannie Wahlberg
Bruce Willis

All have worn beards but adding a bushy, believable beard isn't hard for an actor. 🌹

Dannie Whalberg ❤ but if we are talking hunks can we fit Tom Hanks in somewhere? maybe the very senior barrister who takes "down home" cases?

heldinadream · 13/05/2024 19:11

YaBruvva - Brian Blessed with a shaved head, then there can be a scene where he goes and shouts at Babs and it blows her into the air and her grubby gardening shorts get caught in a tree so she's left dangling there while @YaMuvva , YaBruvva, DH, and sundry other sympathisers set up camp underneath in deckchairs and clink the champagne glasses while she swivels in the breeze.

Atethehalloweenchocs · 13/05/2024 19:28

The really sweet guy who played Hodor in GoT - with a shaved head! Hope you feel better soon OP.

CaptainMyCaptain · 13/05/2024 19:32

I hope you feel better soon. I had a hysterectomy when I was 45 and not having periods any more was fantastic.

WearyAuldWumman · 13/05/2024 19:45

JazzPigeon24 · 13/05/2024 16:35

@WearyAuldWumman that is an inspired bit of casting! Loved him in Outlander.

Same!

Picoloangel · 13/05/2024 20:00

Hope you’ll soon be on the mend OP.

Is anyone else getting Xmas movie vibes?!

WearyAuldWumman · 13/05/2024 20:07

Picoloangel · 13/05/2024 20:00

Hope you’ll soon be on the mend OP.

Is anyone else getting Xmas movie vibes?!

Closing scene: close-up of Christmas tree.

Camera pulls back to reveal YaMuvva family seated in garden chairs arranged round tree. All warmly clad and drinking steaming thermos cups of brandy infused drink.

Family members touch cups and shout "Cheers!" to camera!

Lindos1 · 13/05/2024 20:17

OP hope your medical issues go as smoothly as they can over the coming months.
Life is hard, & honestly, this thread is the funniest thing I've seen in ages!
Thank you!

Picoloangel · 13/05/2024 20:30

WearyAuldWumman · 13/05/2024 20:07

Closing scene: close-up of Christmas tree.

Camera pulls back to reveal YaMuvva family seated in garden chairs arranged round tree. All warmly clad and drinking steaming thermos cups of brandy infused drink.

Family members touch cups and shout "Cheers!" to camera!

Obviously @YaMuvva will have to open a bakery making delicious festive cookies using products from the allotment obvs. There will obviously also have to be a lawyer/PR executive perhaps a close friend of OP who comes home for the holidays but gets stuck there and is forced to spend time with her first love who owns a Cmas tree farm. Unbelievably this friend will rediscover her true values, fall in love with first love and return home to run a local cafe/florist/craft shop/mistletoe farm.

Those films are about as original as the Rainbow Magic books 🤣🎅🏻

WearyAuldWumman · 13/05/2024 20:48

Picoloangel · 13/05/2024 20:30

Obviously @YaMuvva will have to open a bakery making delicious festive cookies using products from the allotment obvs. There will obviously also have to be a lawyer/PR executive perhaps a close friend of OP who comes home for the holidays but gets stuck there and is forced to spend time with her first love who owns a Cmas tree farm. Unbelievably this friend will rediscover her true values, fall in love with first love and return home to run a local cafe/florist/craft shop/mistletoe farm.

Those films are about as original as the Rainbow Magic books 🤣🎅🏻

Re: the bakery.

I'm trying to think here...Festive carrot cakes, perchance?

Oh! There has to be a cute family dog with twigs attached to a harness to play a reindeer.

Picoloangel · 13/05/2024 21:00

@WearyAuldWumman maybe OP could grow holly and mistletoe or cranberries! Christmas cranberry cookies 🍪!

they could go carolling with the dog on the allotment

WearyAuldWumman · 13/05/2024 21:17

Picoloangel · 13/05/2024 21:00

@WearyAuldWumman maybe OP could grow holly and mistletoe or cranberries! Christmas cranberry cookies 🍪!

they could go carolling with the dog on the allotment

Perfect!

YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:00

MooseBeTimeForSnow · 13/05/2024 17:49

Jason Statham surely? It’s all about faaaamly.

I love my brother but this would be an insult to Jason Statham 🤣

So I bumped into another neighbour walking her dog as I went for my 20m “invalid walk” as DH calls it - we had a gossip and she said Babs (who she lives across the road from) is v hated and so many people has had problems with her on the street except Sally. She said ultimately she’s a big coward though and will probably just be gone by the 20th but will make a big song and dance to allotment neighbours.

OP posts:
YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:00

viques · 13/05/2024 18:14

Will the solicitors be writing to you so that you have Sallys declaration in black and white? I hope they do because it wouldn’t harm to let Babs have a copy to share with Penfold, and you could also let other people know how sad you are that it has come to this, that two such long standing friends as Babs and Sally should have a friendship destroyed over Babs’ intransigence and refusal to accept the situation.

Yes and I’m arming myself with a copy when we go down on the 21st (well I probably won’t go but DH will)

OP posts:
YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:01

slore · 13/05/2024 18:24

I wish I'd suggested to you to record the phone calls with Sally! My mum's in a legal dispute and phone call recordings have come in very handy because they other party has not been truthful. It would have been good to have a recording of her saying it was Babs' plot for future compensation claims (when you're feeling better), at the very least for legal fees.

Definitely make Sally and Babs squirm. Also as suggested upthread get a letter from Sally's solicitor to show to Babs.

Babs needs to know that if Sally really intended for her to have this plot, she would have gifted it to her legally. Instead, Sally happily sold it along with her house.

I know looking back it was a schoolboy error not to record them but we just weren’t thinking!

OP posts:
YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:01

heldinadream · 13/05/2024 19:11

YaBruvva - Brian Blessed with a shaved head, then there can be a scene where he goes and shouts at Babs and it blows her into the air and her grubby gardening shorts get caught in a tree so she's left dangling there while @YaMuvva , YaBruvva, DH, and sundry other sympathisers set up camp underneath in deckchairs and clink the champagne glasses while she swivels in the breeze.

😂😂😂

OP posts:
YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:02

CaptainMyCaptain · 13/05/2024 19:32

I hope you feel better soon. I had a hysterectomy when I was 45 and not having periods any more was fantastic.

That is the major upside - I’ve had nightmare periods for a while and I look forward to them stopping

OP posts:
AwBlessm · 13/05/2024 22:24

YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:01

I know looking back it was a schoolboy error not to record them but we just weren’t thinking!

But actually, it's good that there's no record of her saying 'It's Babs' allotment really'. Her ass-covering new story that Babs was asked to leave is much better for you.

Interesting that Babs is generally disliked. Now I think you'll fit right in with the neighbours!

allhailthebrain · 13/05/2024 22:39

Did we ever agree who was playing YOU @YaMuvva because they now need to be good at modelling surgical stockings and sitting in deckchairs - it's not a look every actress can pull off...

Is the legal advice (chasing her solicitor etc) costing you anything? I can totally see why you'd decide not to go down the litigation route right now as your health is number one - but if this is costing you, can you at least have the solicitor politely tell them they need to cover it?

YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:43

allhailthebrain · 13/05/2024 22:39

Did we ever agree who was playing YOU @YaMuvva because they now need to be good at modelling surgical stockings and sitting in deckchairs - it's not a look every actress can pull off...

Is the legal advice (chasing her solicitor etc) costing you anything? I can totally see why you'd decide not to go down the litigation route right now as your health is number one - but if this is costing you, can you at least have the solicitor politely tell them they need to cover it?

No our conveyancing solicitors have not charged us. We used our home is Brian e for the letter to Baba so didn’t fork out for that either

OP posts:
BruceAndNosh · 13/05/2024 22:44

but will make a big song and dance to allotment neighbours

  • *A song and dance? So Allotment - The Musical is now a big Busby Berkley one?
allhailthebrain · 13/05/2024 22:57

YaMuvva · 13/05/2024 22:43

No our conveyancing solicitors have not charged us. We used our home is Brian e for the letter to Baba so didn’t fork out for that either

Excellent - hopefully it'll all be over by the 21st and you can move on, with 99% lovely new neighbours (and a new musical in development over at the allotments)