Changing My Name From Laura to Francesca or Lara?

[antiquesandwine]

Likely a strange post, but I want to change my name. This isn't a baby name post, but a name change advice post for me, a woman in her 30s.

My official first name is Laura. Although I've used this name for over thirty years, I have no emotional connection to it. I've never liked the sound of the name, and when I introduce myself to new people, I cringe at telling them my name. I mumble it and hope they'll forget it, which they often do anyway.

Laura was by far the most common name in my year group at school. I was known as "Laura no. 4." Nowadays, when I tell people my name, they say, "Oh, you must have been born in the 80s!" I've also recently discovered that my mother never wanted to call me Laura, but my father insisted. I'm so sorry to all the other Lauras, but I'm done with this name. There are far worse names out there, but I genuinely feel it's holding me back, personally and career-wise.

My new name options, in my mind, are either Francesca, my official middle name, or Lara, which is obviously Laura without the U. I love the fact that Francesca is a strong, timeless and pretty name, but I would insist on being called my full name, as I positively hate Fran or Frankie. While Cesca is OK, I would only want it as an occasional nickname.

I really like the name Lara, but sometimes I worry that it's a little bland and sounds like the American version of Laura! At the same time, it's cooler and less fussy than Francesca.

Any thoughts? Francesca or Lara? I love both names in a way that I've never loved Laura, but I'm terrified of making the wrong choice! Thank you.

If you don't want a nickname, don't go for Francesca!
Lara is a brilliant name and not easily shortened.
Good luck!

I think Laura is a lovely name.

If you really want to change it, I’d go by Francesca because it’s your middle name and you won’t have to make any legal changes, you can just go by it.

Or you could go by Lara and just keep Laura
on bank statements etc. it’s close enough to just say that you pronounce Laura as Lara.

i don’t think I’d arse around actually changing it all legally, with banks etc.

Lara Francesca is lovely and not such a leap.

Both are pretty but Franchesca will almost certainly be shortened by some people. What about Lorna? That's a bit more unusual. I do feel for you because I have the 50s version, never been an only one always several with the same name as me.

Laurie, Lauren, Lorelai?

I know a Laura Francesca, wondering if it’s you!

I actually like the name Laura, but as you don’t, Lara Francesca sounds nice. I maybe wouldn’t go for Francesca if you don’t like the shortenings as it’s bound to happen!

Laurel or Lorelei?

Lola?

Just introduce yourself from now on, to everyone as Lara, I have two friends called Sara, both spelt Sarah and and pronounced Sara to rhyme with Tara. You can call yourself whatever you like OP.

Lara is lovely but I feel that if you're going to change your name as an adult it needs to be BOLD. Lara is too close to Laura, you'd be constantly correcting people you know forever.

If you're Emily, you don't want to become Emma, you want to become Grace.

Francesca is a lovely name too- but does it feel like you? There are billions of names, you don't have to pick your middle name for ease.

I'd I changed equally 80s my name (I'm Emma Jane) I wouldn't be Jane, I'd be Tallula "lulu" Nightingale

Go ahead and change it. It will take a lifetime for friends and family to stop using Laura. Your marriage certificate will say xxx, formally known as Laura, as will your children's birth certificates! As someone who has done this, I assure you at your age it will create as many issues as it solves

Nowadays, when I tell people my name, they say, "Oh, you must have been born in the 80s

As if.

It’s really easy to change your name legally OP, and it doesn’t cost you anything.

Just reassuring you in case you do go down that route.

Lara is beautiful. I like Francesca but people will call you Fran, Frannie, Frankie, Francie, Chessy, Cescie, Cesca - all sorts. I think if you have put up with a name you don't like all this time, then choose one that doesn't have the same problem.

It's happened to me several times over in medical and professional settings. If I loved my name, I wouldn't care, but I've always loathed it. It's almost as though people can tell.

Thank you; this is what worries me. Lara almost sounds like a mispronounced Laura.

I genuinely love the name Francesca. I've spent forever looking at alternative names, but nothing is sticking.

Laura is a timeless name, can’t see a 1980s connection at all.

It’s not realistic to expect people who already know you to remember to change only the vowel sound in the middle of your name. It will just be a constant “Hi Laura, oops Lara ha ha”.

Changing to a completely different name like Francesca is much more memorable.

Thanks so much.

Lolol. Very valid point, and one I've been worried about. Going from Laura to Lara could be a headache for everyone involved.

Francesca is lovely. I think I’d go with that, a clear change, rather than a subtle one that people are likely to forget.

There really is an 80's boom of Lauras. It's my name too. My mum called me it and didn't know a single one then BAM every other girl was called it. The other name she liked was Gemma and I think that's a similar story.
I don't love my name but it could be worse. I do my work under another name though (creative) so that helps.

' I genuinely feel it's holding me back, personally and career-wise. '

I really don't see it holding you back career wise.

OMG, get over yourself. It's a lovely name. And of course your name is not what's holding you back. Have you thought about getting some counselling?

I think Francesca too. It's already your name, you are just changing which bit of it you'd liked used. No paperwork changes (and from changing my surname once for marriage this was such a faff I would be in no hurry to change my name again.) No expense (and things like changing passports adds up). I don't think you need to worry about unwanted nicknames as an adult, people don't tend to do that outside of school.

I have a couple of relatives who go by their middle names and it isn't so unusual.

It was the same case for my parents. The name Laura was suddenly everywhere. I'm also in a creative field. I need to buy a new domain to showcase my portfolio, and the thought of going by 'Laura' is making me weep. It's not the worst name by a long shot, but I've never got on with it.

When you work in a creative field where your name is part of your brand and hate your name with a passion, trust me, it can.