Ukrainian house guest doesn't want to leave!

[reallyneedmoresleep]

We've had a Ukrainian house guest for the last six months via the Homes for Ukraine scheme. When she came to live with us, we said it would be for a six month period and at the last welfare check we confirmed that she would need to move out by mid-May.
She doesn't want to leave. She has asked several times if she can stay, we have said no. She says our house is much nicer than where she can afford to move to.

I have visited estate agents with her who advise that to rent privately, she either needs a guarantor (we are not prepared to do this) or to pay six month's rent plus the deposit up front. She cannot afford this.

What do we do?

I know the situation in Ukraine is appallling and I am writing from a position of immense priveledge but we have found it really difficult having someone else in our home. She is not an easy person to be around, does not work, has refused all offers to be taken to support groups and frequently just hangs around us when we are in the house when we are trying to work or just to chill. Our son is home from uni in a couple of weeks and we need the room back.

There has been radio silence from the council Homes for Ukraine scheme.
How can I help her to move on?

I'd love to see the housing officer's face when she says she can't have a room in a shared house because she snores.

Unbelievable.

This OP.
Your son needs the room. So she no longer has one. That's the reality

I think the fact she isn’t working and has stopped several decent jobs means you aren’t being horrible at all and I think most people would be at the end of their tether by now! She presumably snored in Ukraine and lives with you so the excuse about Drs and house shares doesn’t add up

We have had our Ukrainian guest For nearly 2 years however we have been extremely fortunate and she is very much part of the family. That said our council has been extremely helpful and this is where I would go to get advice and to stay clearly that you can no longer host her.

is she claiming universal credit? Are you aware that she can and she can also claim the housing element, so there is really no reason why she can't be housed in a private room.

You write to the council and you give them a solid end date. It’s up the council to sort accommodation for her. Even if that’s a a b&b.

you have to be verrrry firm on the end date with the Council as otherwise they will keep trying to convince you to extend. I would also regularly check in with the council to remind them the end date is coming.

i had to do this with the Ukrainian family I had. They were lovely but they were with me for a year and I wanted my home back.

Yes they willl, been multiple multiple cases where police have forcibly removed Ukrainian families from host homes when they refused to move (I was part of a Ukrainian host group) . They have zero rights to stay in your home a minute longer than you want them to and the police have and will act to have the removed

Hope you get this resolved via the HfU coordinator OP

My friend’s family went back to Ukraine. Their area is quite far from the troubles. How bad is it where she is from?

She sounds awful. Will the council act as a guarantor? They do a sort of scheme in our area where the council help with deposits and liaising with landlords.

Did she not work? She was supposed to get a job or set up a business and earn her keep to move out.

If she is unable to support herself on either the Ukrainian relief via UC or through work, she is free to return to Ukraine. Many have opted to return as Western Ukraine isn’t too bad, medically it is better and they can get decent employment. The other reason was a lot figured the support for Ukrainians wasn’t as much as other countries offered. We’re rather stingy by comparison to most of Europe.

Contact your council and tell them she will be homeless on X date. Don’t budge and make her homeless. Involve the police if you must. The council will have to act then.

I always thought from the start what happens after 6 months and the person can’t/ won’t move out . How do you get them out because they are technically homeless
your in a very awkward situation OP

You’ve done your bit. Be very clear that she needs to leave and the council will have to sort something out.
I’d be more sympathetic IF she had worked hard and had acquired savings. She just sounds lazy. And delusional if she thinks anyone is going to employ her as a Russian teacher!

Contact Shelter and/or the local council housing team. They both should have experience dealing with this.

It is hard op. Never a good deed went unpunished etc.

We had our Ukrainian family with us for nine months; they were incredibly hard working people who worked every hour they could from the moment they arrived, had money saved up and could afford the rent for the small cottage we helped them find. But still that wasn’t good enough for the lettings agents round here, who had all sorts of impossible hoops for them to jump through, so in the end we paid their rent upfront for them for the year. They paid us back in monthly instalments.

They are lovely people who still turn up on our doorstep with a birthday cake for us on every family birthday. We were lucky.

I also wanted to mention this when I saw the OP had said
I know the situation in Ukraine is appallling and I am writing from a position of immense priveledge
Some parts of the Ukraine are safe. I live in a European country not that far from Ukraine. Many people who came here at the beginning of the war have gone back as increasing areas of the country have become safe again.
So I think you need to put that out of your mind OP. You gave her a home for 6 months and that was plenty of time to get herself sorted out - to find a job and to find her own accommodation. She hasn't done that and now doesn't want to move on because she can't find anywhere as nice.
Well, I'm afraid, that's tough because you said 6 months and now that time is up and your son needs the room.

I'd remind her that the leaving date is x and that she will have to vacate the property on that date because your son needs the room.
I wouldn't be helping her to sort things out. You've pointed her in the right direction. She can also look for lodgings somewhere or a room in a shared house or if there's nothing in the small town you live in she will have to look elsewhere.

Everyone I know who did this ended up in this position. Our Government are disgustingly negligent.

Exactly. Never understood why Ukrainians got special treatment. No-one was taking in Afghans.

This is lovely to hear 💚

You need to be firm. As others have said, you give her notice and tell the council.

The scheme was badly thought through - there should have been absolute clarity to all new arrivals that this was a time limited opportunity to find somewhere safe, find work and save to rent. Instead they have extended the scheme for three years - imagine how much money can be saved by working with no living costs.

My guest stayed a year, earning a reasonable though not massive salary and then when I gave her notice (she's perfectly pleasant but a year was enough) she found another host. She's therefore had two years of living rent free, at a cost (now) of £500 a month to the taxpayer. She says she cant afford to rent but that is because she wants to live in zone 2, close to the tube, in this area which is not cheap. It's most frustrating, given there is no reason for her to not be independent at this point.

My friend is in a similar situation and is about to give notice to her Ukranian lodger who has been with them for 9 months, refuses to get a job (despite being very well qualified and having excellent IT and english) and who just lies in bed gaming or drinking all day. Friend says it's like having a belligerent teenager in the house who won't do her own washing, shower, cook or tidy her room. She rarely leaves the house so they don't get a break from each other. Whilst appreciating the woman is probably depressed about living in the uk again (she did her degree here originally) she refuses to do anything with her life - even volunteering. Friend sadly feels like her parent, not her landlady.

Harshly
she could of done more to help herself
you simply don’t have room when your son comes home

I would stop feeling sorry for this person, give them notice to leave in writing (if you haven't already), and be firm.

On the day she is meant to leave, if she hasn't packed her things, go to her room with some bags for life / black sacks and start packing for her.

That's your son's room, not hers. You're not asking her to leave anymore, you're telling her. She has been incredibly lazy and I can't believe she hasn't stuck at a job.

To the pp saying the police wouldn't do anything, erm... yes they would! You phone them and say you've got someone in your home and they are not welcome and will not leave.

I know two people who ave come over and with support have managed to get full time jobs and become independent and are very grateful for the support the government Gave them. So that is not entirely true .

It's your house just change the locks if she's not home by the deadline