Ukrainian house guest doesn't want to leave!

[reallyneedmoresleep]

We've had a Ukrainian house guest for the last six months via the Homes for Ukraine scheme. When she came to live with us, we said it would be for a six month period and at the last welfare check we confirmed that she would need to move out by mid-May.
She doesn't want to leave. She has asked several times if she can stay, we have said no. She says our house is much nicer than where she can afford to move to.

I have visited estate agents with her who advise that to rent privately, she either needs a guarantor (we are not prepared to do this) or to pay six month's rent plus the deposit up front. She cannot afford this.

What do we do?

I know the situation in Ukraine is appallling and I am writing from a position of immense priveledge but we have found it really difficult having someone else in our home. She is not an easy person to be around, does not work, has refused all offers to be taken to support groups and frequently just hangs around us when we are in the house when we are trying to work or just to chill. Our son is home from uni in a couple of weeks and we need the room back.

There has been radio silence from the council Homes for Ukraine scheme.
How can I help her to move on?

Calm down blueandsad.

I agree with PP that you need to give her a definite date to move out, in writing. Also get some legal advice to make sure that you can pack up her stuff and change the locks without any repercussions

The refugee is nothing but a guest. OP could chuck her out today, if she wanted to.

There are vast networks and thousands of workers in Russia devoted to spreading proaganda and infiltrating Western media and all interent forums : The Guardian / Facebook / Telegraph / Reddit ... the list is endless and the Russian state has enormous resources to spend on creating 000 000 s of accounts to influence public opinion over here , and in the USA ( Trump / Marjorie Greene et al )

The UK has it's own 50cent army. I think of them as the 5p army. Based on some of the posts in this thread that's twice too much to be paying them.

It's Chinese whispers and hearsay gone wild - Ukrainians do pop back , but for very valid reasons / NOT cosmetic surgery... This rumour is pernicious and evil.

This sounds quite unhinged and paranoid.

People having opinions that differ from yours doesn't mean those people are bots or part of some type of conspiracy.

Someone in my family has been through something similar (although the family were happy to leave if they could so probably slight easier) - they were asked to have them for an emergency stay for a week, and 3 months later were still there. (Worth noting not through their own fault, they were looking and were very apologetic nothing was moving).
The council weren't interested as they 'had somewhere to stay' so went to be low priority. They ended up having to kick them out (it was a joint decision between them) and they had to present at the council as homeless before they'd sort them.
Also check any local Ukrainian charities - there are loads on fb etc who should be able to help point you in the right direction maybe?

@Hermittrismegistus

It might sound unhinged to you but it is fact. I thought everyone knew that

Different angles depending on how the russians are faring

The news from the USA has triggered the latest onslaught

Ukraine was equally, if not more corrupt than Russia before the war. There was a massive criminal conference in Odessa! And my direct experience since indicates an uptick in corruption with various aid initiatives being taken advantage of. So while I agree with you, this isn’t the place to shout about it. Especially as it’s about getting a lazy person out of the OP’s house.

Oh they are all out today aren’t they? Any chance to bang the anti-Ukraine drum.

Was I shouting?

It's been mentioned in previous replies and if you think corruption is not involved in this war, you are severely mistaken.

Oh dear

Would you also suggest she gets work as a child minder. Or do you only think its only the elderly who should suffer being looked after by someone who doesnt want to be there. FFS no wonder care work isnt valued when it keeps being the default setting

How would she become a childminder? There are all sorts of hoops to jump through and training to do. Not to mention CRB checks .She would also need equipment and to be working from her own home, not someone else’s home!

Plenty of people don't want to be at work. Fine, as long as she can do her job well enough and not make it obvious she'd rather be somewhere else. It's not ideal, but in jobs that are so desperate for workers, someone who is only there so they can pay the bills is better than no one.

Are you calling people on here liars?

Interesting.

There are massive issues within Ukraine which followed Ukrainians here. And a lot of very good, perhaps naive people found out the hard way. Why is this controversial?

That doesn't mean that Ukrainians shouldn't have been allowed here or that people who had a bad experience or difficult end to hosting completely regret it either.

As I say, it's deeply complex and not black and white.

And as usual the elderly are the collateral that we can test this out on.

I've worked in care. Having someone who does an adequate job without their heart in it is far preferable to being short-staffed. For both other staff and the service users.

You were so busy shouting, you missed the fact I actually agreed with you! It’s just not the right place to discuss it.

Nobody is shouting!

Just because you disagree with a post, you don't need to accuse them of shouting. Grow up!

dogs are considered 'unclean' in muslim countries

unusually philosophical response for mumsnet. and 'on point'.

No one forced them to come to the UK. It’s a choice on their part.

i don't believe we are in disagreement.

@sidebirds

You're right. No one forced them to come. But if you stood at your window and watched Russian tanks roll into your town and begin shooting, as my guests did, do you think you might want to go somewhere where you knew your children would be safe?

Whether that's the UK, Poland, Germany or somewhere else, a little empathy from some people, including you, wouldn't hurt.