Anyone else struggling to find meaning in life and wondering what it's all about?

[Mumonceremoved]

Middle aged and generally just wondering what the point of it all is.

Why are we here?
What's the meaning of life?
What even is happiness?

Anyone else just feeling meh about the day to day drudgery and futility of it all?

Or if you did feel this way, how did you manage to snap out of it?

Is it normal?

I just don’t understand why you think it’s all over now? There is more to life than teen excitement. Can you appreciate the nature around you? Running with the wind in your hair? A hug from a small child? A gentle kiss? The stars at night? The taste of good food or fine wine? The thrill of arriving in a new country? The scent of summer - freshly cut lawns and lavender. A good sleep. A warm bath. Dancing at a festival or sitting in a church. Singing at Christmas? The universe around you.

Where is your joy op?

Indeed @Polishedshoesalways where is my joy?

Beautiful post

I can relate to this as it's very much how I feel about everything. I think in my case its being an anxiety sufferer why I feel this way. I dread anything I have to do and can't wait until it's all over until the next thing. I really do not enjoy life if I'm honest and do feel some relief that it'll all be over one day. I hate the routine of the yearly cycle of life, Christmas, birthdays, Easter same shit on TV at the same times of year each year. It just goes on and on.

I hear that, The endless mundanity of it all.

Whose getting voted out of <insert somewhere I don't give a fuck about> next?
Which almost famous/was once famous can sing/dance/knit/breathe the best?
The endless rotation of story lines on the endless fucking soaps

I mean who fucking cares?!

N.B I appreciate some of you will care. I don't.

Science doesn’t say anything about a God or God.

And actually for many scientists, what they discover is directing them towards a God, an entity that created the world just because things have to be perfect to the 10th decimal that they don’t believe it’s all down to chance.

Some scientists are religious. Feynman also deals with this in his 2nd lecture. He says that religion basically has 3 aspects: 1. The basics (god created the earth etc etc). 2. Humans can't be trusted to behave with a straight moral compass without either the promise of heaven or the endless punishment of hell. 3. Religion inspires art etc.

He says that as science progresses, religion is having to move on it's 1st premise of god creating the world in 7 days and the more science develops and the more religion is forced to concede, the harder it will be for everyone, esp scientists, to believe in religion.

Not everyone will agree with him. I do.

He also finds it difficult to understand how you can push the boundaries of science into the unknown and still believe in the religious certainty of a creator.

But I have, without doubt, done him a disservice service here so I would suggest listening to it before coming to judgement on the basis of what I have probably very poorly remembered

But can you not feel any of those things? Ever?
If the answer is no, you need to see the GP - book some counselling and seek help.

It’s not normal to feel so numb, it’s not normal to feel so helpless. Life doesn’t have to carry ‘meaning’ but you should be able to feel a full range of emotions including joy at times.

You don’t need to live like this. Please do just one thing for yourself, and book an app with the doctor first thing.

I appreciate your concern @Polishedshoesalways, the GP has helped the best he can. He is trying to medicate me out of this, it's just not working.

Counselling is ongoing in various forms.

I am sorry it’s so tough for you at the moment. Are you making no headway in counselling?
There will be a reason for this, are you feeling disassociated almost?

What is your life like? Do you have good reason to be struggling? Is your living environment dangerous or stressful?

Maybe it's the medication that is numbing your sense of happiness and joy? Something to discuss with your GP perhaps?

I'm having counselling too.

But - I just thought of something that does bring me joy! Live music. Big sweaty gigs where you just anonymously dance your pants off.

That's one thing.

My thoughts exactly. Hoping the best is not over with.

Perhaps it is okay to sit down in the midst of existential apathy for awhile. It’s okay to be dissatisfied although we need not accept it. I come back again to Pascal’s insight, “In this way, all man's miseries go to prove his greatness. They are the miseries of a mighty potentate, of a dethroned monarch.” We do not know fully what we are. Our lives remain somewhat hidden to us, tucked up in others’ memories. We are, in a deep sense, never whole. Perhaps you should be apathetic towards the present world and its apparent answers. I like Iain Mcgilchrist’s frustration about the bureaucratization of our society. It is not one to give us meaning.

I wonder how much of it is hormonal too.
I 'lost my mirth' when the dc were very small. I felt nothing. But I think it was a combination of post natal hormones and survival at that point.

I find the joy in small things now, but I also appreciate the big things. But i don't need them as much. I couldn't have found the small joys when I was in the mire of small children.

I definitely don't feel like I'm filling time. I don't have enough time. I feel like I lost my desire to learn new stuff when dc were younger, perhaps because juggling ft work and small kids was enough, but now I want to learn more. More languages; more instruments; more history. I just don't have the time to do more than dabble here and there. But I accept that I'll always be a jack of all trades, master of none. And that in itself makes me happy.

Have you considered you might be depressed. It sounds to me like you know all the right things to do and understand it all but can't quite see the point of it all.
I do think as others have said it is an age thing and at 49 I go through phases of it. I immerse myself in podcasts. Have you tried Michael Singer? Jay Shetty - on purpose is amazing too.

I can identify with this.

I too have people that I lost through bereavement, family dispute, location, misunderstanding.

I think the key to happiness is being surrounded by a supportive, non judgemental, large family. Mine has always been fragmented and over the years drifted so far apart, the word 'family' doesn't mean anything. I struggle to know what it is even supposed to look like and how to act like a family for my own children.

Having a supportive network must be the key to keeping loneliness from knocking at your door, keeping busy and knowing that you are loved and needed. As the proverb says 'a problem shared is a problem halved'. It is ok if there are times during your life that you feel lonely but it isn't supposed to be a constant in your life.

I look at mistakes I've made, I daydream at how things could have been different, I envy people who speak about their family gatherings. People dream about being rich. I dream of being able to pick up the phone to someone like a mum, or someone who has known me for years and they are unconditionally glad to hear me on the phone. Very simple things that are taken for granted by many I'm sure.

I can't remember a time when I didn't feel 'empty' Even the birth of my children was mixed with a huge sense of loss.

Icehocky flowers
i know that feeling of missing connection.
is there any way you could rebuild some family relationships that have drifted Zoe broken down, for your own sake?

Sadly not. Death and distance.

The family member who is nearest (n location) is one I learned a long time ago not to trust.She drains me. My stomach drops when I see her name flashing on my phone.

I don’t think those things indicate depression.

Some people just don’t give a shit about anything.

I never have. I was made to do politics at college. Lasted a month as I just didn’t care. I remember the tutor and other classmates getting so exasperated with me as I just didn’t care - and still don’t, almost 30 years later. I’ve never voted. Don’t give a shit about any party, couldn’t muster a fuck about anything going on in the country or the world in general if I tried. It’s all meaningless bollocks to me.

I don’t care about climate change, wars. If I can’t steer away from conversations that I couldn’t give a shit about, people get so angry at me. why don’t I care about the environment? Why don’t I give a shit about my future grandchildren, or theirs?

I just don’t care. I never have. I don’t care about what’s going on in the world, politics, people dying, any of it. it doesn’t mean I am depressed, I just can’t explain all the ways I don’t give a shit.

Im sorry, but that’s the biggest load of horse shite I’ve ever heard.
Do you know what, the more you talk down to yourself and about your self, the more you believe what you are saying. The more positive things you type and say, your mind will slowly start to believe them. Stop right now in putting yourself down.
Of course all the best things haven’t passed?! Unless you are in the last few weeks dying of something horrible, pick yourself up and take a deep breath.
There are so many more things to be enjoyed. So many. Life is full of wonder and happiness in all sorts of places if you choose to see it. Things that will help.

1. Fresh unprocessed food. Only eat junk at home once a week (I choose Friday evening) As much as possible fresh healthy unprocessed food as you can get.
2. Get outside and walk most days. Staying inside is your enemy. Find your local places that are beautiful. We have so so many in the UK. Spring is here. Walk for 20mins even somewhere pretty. If it’s raining take a brollly or go to a cafe somewhere nice like NT or similar and have a hot drink whilst looking out of the window.
3. meaningful interactions. Join something you enjoy. Volunteer. Make the move to meet up with friends more. Seek ways to have more meaningful interactions.
4. Put things in to look forward to. Small things. Big things far ahead. What do you enjoy. Travel? Then join the fb groups a few days away or extreme day trips for ideas or any of the other zillion fb budget travel groups.
5. Start making small changes to your life. Don’t do it next week. Start today. One tiny small thing. Some research. Find something that makes you happy and see how you can make it happen.
6. Believe in yourself. Stop talking badly about your life and yourself. Even if your mind is saying it, stop. Positive attitude starts with you. Life absolutely does not have to be the way you describe.

Two questions. What (if anything) do you give a shit about?
Are you happy in your life the way you are / feel?

What is it that has made you like this?

I feel every sentence you've written here.

Thann you for sharing that @Icehockeyflowers and being so honest