The worst thing that's ever happened to me

[IHateLegDay]

I was out for lunch with DH and bit into a ham sandwich, not realising it had mustard on it. I blurted out "this is the worst thing that's ever happened to me!" 😂
Obviously it's not. I've had plenty of trauma in my life but whenever the conversation arises of 'the worst thing that's ever happened', that's what comes into my head!
So what's the (not actually) worst thing that's ever happened to you?

(Lighthearted 😊)

When I was little we went to pick my Mum up from the hairdresser. She'd been to get a perm which was very "in" at the time. Me and my brother both screamed and cried when the "weird lady" went to get in to our car. My poor mum 😂

I was very hungover and the only thing for it was a Dominos pizza.. I thought I had selected extra cheese but evidently I clicked once too many times and the thing turned up with NO CHEESE
I appreciate it was my mistake but why would they think anyone’s correct order was a cheese and tomato pizza no cheese…. Totally ruined my whole week because they’re bloody expensive too 😭

A few years ago, me and DP bought 2 tubs of Mackie's honeycomb ice cream for a treat. We ate one over a few days , and saved the other one for whenever.

"Whenever" came, and we got the sacred tub out of the freezer 20 mins before we wanted it so it would be all melty and delicious. Went to serve it up, and it was partially defrosted Bolognese sauce. I was fucking fuming. Still am, tbh.

I knocked a cactus off a shelf once... but caught it
😩😩😩😩😩

It took hours, and then weeks to get the spikes out of my hand, fingers, under my wedding ring. They were embedded in my actual soul and I couldn't actually believe it, still can't..!

Edit to add - I said cactus, it was actually a pot of multiple cactuses, from big fuck off spiky things to those with near invisible hair-like bastard spines.

Oh, and once the dog brought a hedgehog in from the garden and put it on the doormat inside the back door. I didn't realise what it was, and I trod on it in bare feet - it was so painful, and my foot bled loads!

Many years ago we had a ball at the school I work at. Having imbibed rather a lot of alcohol I left at 2am with my friends husband. My feet started hurting so I took my shoes off and set off with my dress hoiked up. I kept standing on gravel..
ME.. "OWWWWW"
FDH "SHHHH"
ME "OOOOHHH OWWW"
FDH"WILL YOU BE QUIET YOU'LL WAKE THE NEIGHBOURS UP!! "
We got to FDH house and he went in and let the dog out..
I carried on walking down the road to mine.
FDH then heard..
" OWWW, OWW, OWW, SHITTTTT SORRY!!"
I had trodden on a snail in the dark with bare feet!!! 🤯 🤯 🤯 🤮 🤮 🤮 🤮

oooh it’s a toss up between these two :
I was driving down a country lane and there was a (long deceased) badger corpse in the road. A boy racer came bombing it down the other side towards me, ran over the badger corpse and splashed badger juice up and into my open window and onto my bare arm, I then had to drive to a petrol station before I could wipe it off.

or:
when my dd was about 4 we were in maccies and I was having a coffee. Got to the end of my coffee and the last dregs tasted minty, and once drained, there was a lump of chewing gum in the bottom which my dd had pulled from under the table and dropped into my drink. 🤮 she’s 20 now and I still can’t forget it.

Picture the scene. Beautiful sunny October afternoon. I was at the church door, in my wedding dress with a full veil. The guests were all seated, dad just took my arm to walk me down the aisle when ……

I started to scream, “get it out, get it out, fucking hell, get the fucker out”, because a wasp had got under my veil and was trapped between my face and the netting.

5 mins later, peace was restored and I walked up the aisle, like a lady

Arrghhh, it's close @thenewaveragebear1983 ,but I think badger juice has got to be the winner there 😱😩

Many, many years ago I was broke - I had robbed Peter to pay Paul so often Peter had nothing left. My grandad gave me a fiver with strict instructions to spend it on myself so I went to Sainsburys café to buy a coffee and a sandwich, thinking a prawn sandwich would be a real treat. I'd somehow picked up an egg sandwich by mistake and only realised once I'd bitten into it. I had to eat it and it every bite tasted of disappointment.

DH messaged me at work and said he’d bought me a cinnamon bun. Spent my shift looking forward to it, got home it was a raisin bun 😫. Hate raisins, love cinnamon. I buy the cakes now.

I was interviewing a local politician and as he spoke, some tiny bits of spit accidentally came flying out - one went on my hand and another went on my cheek. We both knew it had happened but I had to carry on without wiping (bleaching) for about 20 minutes. That was about 5 years ago and I still don't feel clean.

Oh, and today...I'd been tucking into my homemade macaroni cheese in my head since about 10 this morning but when I finally get home and go to make it, the milk was off. What is even the point of life 😕

I’d just made a cup of tea and a crumpet, with melted butter and some jam on top. The door bell went so reluctantly I went to answer it. Came back into the kitchen no more than a few moments later to find my gorgeous little dog looking very happy. Plate empty 🙈😂. Fortunately there was one let in the packet. Life continued.

Holy shit. That's hardcore. I think I may have nightmares about that one!! 😩

Yes, ours used to come in via the tiny gap at the bottom of the door. As well as the traumatic tread-on-a-slub experience that others have had, sometimes I'd come in the kitchen in the morning to find trails up the walls.

When I was 7, my Auntie came to visit one afternoon. She mentioned that she had made trifle to have in the evening
I loved trifle and started agitating to go and have dinner with Auntie. It was easy to persuade her because she was young and thought I was wonderful.
Anyway off we went to her flat and as soon as I walked in I could smell something awful. I sat at the table.and Auntie brought me a big plate of tripe. It was ghastly and I hated the texture and taste. I had to eat it because I had agitated to get invited. I had.hope that I'd get trifle for pudding but there was.no pudding because Auntie was on a diet.
I'm 71 now and still have vivid memories of that tripe!

A few years back now I bought fresh Turkish delight from a little shop in Totnes. It looked delicious and was a stretch from my normal quarter of cola cubes. I bit into one piece and there was a dead wasp in it.
Wasps do not taste nice and I have never had fresh Turkish delight since.

During covid, in one of the parts where we were allowed to go out and eat, we went for a nice meal. I'd ordered a salad to start, and on the table there was a bottle of salad dressing, so I dribbled some over my salad. Except it wasn't salad dressing, it was bloody hand sanitiser .

Dropped a whole tub of grated parmesan all over the fridge and floor, (including under the fridge). it went in every crevice imaginable and I had to spend ages getting it out out so the whole house didn't stink.

🤣

I once got some broccoli from the green grocers and it had a caterpillar in it.

I absolutely HATE slugs and once there were about 7 or 8 of them on the bottom of the recycling box. I now check the box religiously before I bring it inside! Never going through that again!

The other day I tried to change my toddlers nappy and she put her hands in the poo then ran off trying to touch stuff 🤢 I luckily grabbed her in time!

Many more.

That is the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone. You have my deepest sympathy.

@HuntingoftheSnark that's awful!

I need a link! Please. I tried copper tape. Worked for about a minute.

My partner took a block of cheese wrapped in foil once thinking they were his sandwiches!