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Original poster

Is this odd for me to ask? - DSs girlfriend?

337 replies

Isthisweirdthough · 14/03/2024 22:08

Ds has been with this absolutely lovely girl for around a year now. I adore her.

I managed to get 2 very good tickets for a band I love, and I know that she loves them too. The tickets were expensive so I want to take a fan.

Is it odd to ask her? I've bought tickets for ds, her and me to go to a couple of things before and its been fine, but this would be me and her alone.

It would involve travelling and an overnight stay.

This is my sons first serious relationship and I really want to include her in stuff, but don't want to be too overbearing either.

Would you feel weird if your boyfriends mum took you to a gig alone?

OP posts:
chillicalypso · 15/03/2024 18:21

Glad it worked out well! You sound lovely!

PennyPugwash · 15/03/2024 18:24

It's a gorgeous idea! I once had a lovely "mum in law" like you and we did stuff like this all the time. Still means to world to me. Enjoy

PossumintheHouse · 15/03/2024 18:24

Isthisweirdthough · 15/03/2024 18:19

She responded in 3 seconds flat 🤣

Yes she is coming, she said if she's on shift she will simply quit her job. I told her it's all my treat, and she has said she will buy the wine and will get us Tshirts. She is very excited and not weirded out at all.

So I managed to create a massive drama in my head about absolutely nothing.

Thank you all, I am so excited about this gig, and so happy I'm going with another massive fan.

No drama for this Friday night!? Awww, nuts.

Well done, OP, Gary Barlow would be proud.

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PennyPugwash · 15/03/2024 18:25

GYNisaliarWTF · 14/03/2024 23:15

I’m here to say a few things

  • you sound absolutely delightful
  • you’re worried that you’re doing it wrong, bad mums don’t worry they’re doing it wrong
  • I’m 30, I love gigs. If she isn’t coming, I am
  • you sound super thoughtful & mindful of both their feelings, but if you already meet up for lunches etc, and providing you’re not planning to ask her to go away for the night with you on a monthly basis (I’m sure this is a one off) - then absolutely.
  • I’d kill for a mother in law that thought about me like you do her, and been cautious in your approach, so be proud of that.

just say ‘hey DS’sGF, I’ve got tickets for bestbandever, wanted to give you first dibs on coming with me before I ask anyone else as I know you love them! Date is ‘x’ & I’ve booked an apartment, it’s all paid for! If you do fancy it please let me know, and if not don’t worry, I’ll ask one of the rest of the clan!’

I saw your PP, if you tell her you’ve got tickets then expect her to volunteer herself, that likely won’t happen (my mother would say that would be really cheeky to suggest)
and I’m assuming as you like her so much, she’s been brought up fairly well & would also not wish to come across rude to you.

good luck OP you’re doing a smashing job.

I love this!!!

Original poster
Isthisweirdthough · 15/03/2024 18:28

PossumintheHouse · 15/03/2024 18:24

No drama for this Friday night!? Awww, nuts.

Well done, OP, Gary Barlow would be proud.

Show quote history

If you need a drama I could probably fashion one out of some sticky backed plastic and a yoghurt pot for you 🤣

It's not a useful talent, but it's all I have.

OP posts:
Mostlyoblivious · 15/03/2024 18:40

Ah awesome! Have a brilliant time!

43ontherocksporfavor · 15/03/2024 18:42

Brilliant op. She sounds fab!

Ellie1015 · 15/03/2024 18:48

Great result! Perfect message and glad she is happy to come. Sounds like a great night, enjoy!

Mrsjayy · 15/03/2024 18:48

similarminimer · 15/03/2024 18:15

I was a bit negative in an earlier post - but honestly, i think that text is spot-on. Have fun (but Howard's mine).

I think I'm more Howard's type soz 😂 he actually gets better with age 😍

Mrsjayy · 15/03/2024 18:53

Isthisweirdthough · 15/03/2024 18:19

She responded in 3 seconds flat 🤣

Yes she is coming, she said if she's on shift she will simply quit her job. I told her it's all my treat, and she has said she will buy the wine and will get us Tshirts. She is very excited and not weirded out at all.

So I managed to create a massive drama in my head about absolutely nothing.

Thank you all, I am so excited about this gig, and so happy I'm going with another massive fan.

she sounds lovely enjoy the concert.

Sleep10 · 15/03/2024 18:54

I think this is a lovely thing to do, I'd definitely ask.
Seems like you both have an amazing relationship already with meeting up & lunching. I'm sure she would be over the moon to attend with you, especially if it's one of her favourite bands!
I hope you have the best time and enjoy it together!
You sound like a lovely MIL, don't over think that part! 💞

Sleep10 · 15/03/2024 18:56

Didn't realise she said yes!
So pleased for you both!

Mrschickenn · 15/03/2024 19:00

Aww I’ve just skipped through to the end and seen she said yes. All along I thought you sound so lovely and there’s no way she won’t want to come. I know it’s natural to worry, but everything you’ve written in my opinion comes across as level-headed, kind and a great Mum and potential future mil.

easilydistracted1 · 15/03/2024 19:02

@Isthisweirdthough great news. As long as she doesn't really quit the job and stop paying her way on dates with her son 🤣🤣🤣

Lurkingonmn · 15/03/2024 19:04

I'm so glad it had a happy resolution. Enjoy the gig!

Yellowpingu · 15/03/2024 19:19

It sounds like you have a similar relationship to me, except my DS has been with her 5 years and they’ve lived together for almost 3 years. Even after a year I wouldn’t have hesitated to ask her something like that. Over Easter DS can’t get time off work so she’s coming to visit for the weekend without him! She wasn’t invited, she asked (admittedly when DS prompted her) and I love that she feels comfortable enough to do that. Enjoy your concert 🎶

agoodfriendofthethree · 15/03/2024 20:11

I've been far too invested in this thread 😂 I'm so pleased she said yes, though I was sure she would as both of you sound so nice! Have a fab time! 😀

Original poster
Isthisweirdthough · 15/03/2024 20:59

I'm so delighted she is coming, we have been messaging backwards and forwards and she asked how long I had been stressing about asking her to come 🤣

I think she maybe knows me too well.

OP posts:
Okaygoahead · 15/03/2024 21:40

This is so heartwarming! You sound like a lovely, thoughtful person and that's probably why your DS in turn has been able to find a lovely, thoughtful person. You two will have a blast. Enjoy!

FlamingoQueen · 15/03/2024 21:45

Isthisweirdthough · 15/03/2024 18:19

She responded in 3 seconds flat 🤣

Yes she is coming, she said if she's on shift she will simply quit her job. I told her it's all my treat, and she has said she will buy the wine and will get us Tshirts. She is very excited and not weirded out at all.

So I managed to create a massive drama in my head about absolutely nothing.

Thank you all, I am so excited about this gig, and so happy I'm going with another massive fan.

Awesome! Very pleased that you asked her.

LordBummenbachsMagnificentBalls · 15/03/2024 21:47

You sound fantastic OP, have a wonderful time!

solemnlyswearimuptonogood · 15/03/2024 22:45

Isthisweirdthough · 15/03/2024 18:19

She responded in 3 seconds flat 🤣

Yes she is coming, she said if she's on shift she will simply quit her job. I told her it's all my treat, and she has said she will buy the wine and will get us Tshirts. She is very excited and not weirded out at all.

So I managed to create a massive drama in my head about absolutely nothing.

Thank you all, I am so excited about this gig, and so happy I'm going with another massive fan.

Love this 🤣
Have the best time OP, you deserve it ❤️

Haggisfish3 · 16/03/2024 00:47

I’m so pleased op. Hope you both have a fabulous time

SocksMcR · 16/03/2024 01:13

Isthisweirdthough · 14/03/2024 22:15

She's 22, we do go for coffee or lunch on a semi regular basis without ds.

Ds wouldn't be coming because I don't have a ticket for him, he wouldn't enjoy it anyway.

I've booked a 2 roomed apartment anyway, I'll take one of my other dc if its a bad idea to ask her, they aren't keen on the band and I know she loves them which is why I thought of her. I just don't want her to think I'm 'that' kind of MIL(ish).

I think it's a lovely idea! You already have an existing "without DS" relationship so this would be a natural next step, I think

IndigoLaFaye · 16/03/2024 06:55

Aw I’m so happy that she’s excited to go with you!
I wouldn’t find it weird at all and I think it’s lovely you are trying to have a relationship with her. You seem self aware enough to know when to back off.