How old were you when you lost your virginity?

[Soubriquet]

And if you have children old enough, how old were they?

I keep hearing about how kids are losing their virginity younger and younger now so I was curious to know how old you were, compared to your children.

I was 17. Dh was 13.

DD is 10 and still at the age where anything sexual grosses her out (thank god). They are currently doing sex education at school at the moment and she comes home horrified every time

@2under4 I was an awkward teenager in a girls school so didn't have any partner till 28. I'd encourage my kids to date and meet someone decent to be with.

22

Three days before my sixteenth birthday. My boyfriend held out until then, he'd literally been fighting me off for months. Bless him.
He said he felt bad afterwards, we should have waited til l was sixteen.

I was 16.
22 yr old DC was 20

16 for me, 17 for DH.

I'm so sorry. My heart breaks for that poor five-year-old that you once were, and for the adult who internalises all that blame and shame. You poor love 💔

You couldn't possibly have consented. Not by any criterion: legal or moral. You were a young, tiny child.

It was not your fault, ever. No child asks for, consents to, or deserves this. Nor does any adult have the right to steal your childhood from you.

Sending you every possible ounce of goodwill from an internet stranger.

16, officially (I was raped as a 10 year old, so technically...).
DD was 18 (to a long-term boyfriend she was with until she was 22).
DS was 14 (although I didn't find out until he was 18, had a bit too much to drink and told me, forgetting momentarily that I was his Mum. No, I was not impressed... His Dad even less so. His sister even less than that.)
His Dad was 17 (with - ?to - me).

Isn't it boys who are losing the virginity at much younger ages these days? I thought girls were staying somewhat static because of the whole risk of pregnancy/ruining potential future careers).

@SerafinasGoose

Thank you, but I'm afraid on this occasion you're wrong. For years I grew up thinking I'd been abused, I got hold of the files held on me by the council and still thinking I had been abused went to the police, which is when I went on an absolute mind fuck of a journey, The police came back to me with "The children's home had done nothing wrong and they had openly recorded that I was a slut who went around asking for sex, therefore I wasnt abused". It's taken a long time but I've accepted that's what I was.

@DimplesToadfoot please believe me that they were very very wrong and, if this is something you feel up to, you could get justice both about what happened and by putting in a complaint about both the care home and the police, all of whom utterly failed you and are disgusting apologists.

Just turned 14. My ''boyfriend'' was in his 20s. Looking back I can see he groomed me. He dated a few girls my age and younger. It wasn't an awful relationship like you read about these grooming gangs so I guess I was lucky in a way. I did tip of the police about him once but nothing came of it.

"What a way to thnk of your first experience of sex/loss of virginity though. Wouldn't it be nicer to think of the time you lost your virginity as the time you first had consensual sex? x"

This is just so, so insensitive. Please think before you post next time.

I'd just turned 16, although it was so quick I'm unsure if it actually counts. Boyfriend was 2 years older, we'd been together since I was 14 and we thought we were in love. We waited until the night after my final GCSE exam as I thought it would be weird to lose my virginity while I was still young enough to wear school uniform. It was a huge disappointment - all my romantic visions went out the window after he finished after just one pump. The most memorable thing about it was Mum telling me off when I got home because I had a cow pat on my cream coat. It all went downhill after that. Boyfriend was a born-again Christian and had a huge guilt trip about succumbing to temptation and not waiting until we were married!

I didn't have sex again after that for another 18 months and I was in my first year at university before I had sex which made me think: wow, that's what all the fuss is about.

DH didn't lose his virginity until he was 20.

DD is only 5 and doesn't even know what sex is.

You've presumably been around 5 year olds as an adult. Do you think there's anything they could do that would it make it ok to have sex with them?

There are not too many things I could read online that genuinely horrify me, but this has. The system has monumentally failed you, and I'm very sorry.

There has been some mention about sex education in schools. So..

I was a form tutor to Jack (14). All off timetable. I was not doing sex education but y10 and Jack were.

So breaktime comes and Jack bursts into my room in floods of tears. Beside himself with upset. ‘I don’t want to do that’. ‘Not ever’. i was quite puzzled and not sure what he never wanted to do. His sobs made it hard to comprehend his real upset.

Turned out he never wanted to have sex. He was the sort of lad who’d put his hand up to answer any question, sit at the front etc. He’d managed to give himself a bit of over exposure and then over thought things.

So we decided…. He didn’t ever need to have sex if he didn’t want to - but he could do with knowing just in case. To sit at the back and keep his hand down.

Went to see his teacher - told him to not ask Jack anything or respond to any hand up from him.

The day went without further incident or upset. He was ok at the end of the day. He’ll be 22/3 now. And in answer to anyones wondering - Not a clue.

32 but I didn't lose it very effectively and it seemed to come back later.

Yes, I’d say you are. Unless the poster is unhappy about it themselves.

Huh?

7 but by choice 21 when I got married.

The poster has already said they find your use of ‘x’ patronising and offensive.

Even though it may not be what you meant, it is really important to listen to how what you are saying is being received.

16 - felt like the right time for me. We loved each other. Didn't last forever but he was a really nice guy and we're still in touch 20 years later.

A guy I dated said he was 13! Was with a long term girlfriend. He said he was just quite mature for his age but I was shocked.

I heard young people now are NOT having sex at all. Too busy on phones 😅

33

15, that was usual around here in the mid 90’s. Not sure about Dh. Ds19 was 17 afaik. Not sure about dd23, I’d say late teens if not older.

22. Still with the partner.

18, many in my peer group (late 1980s) lost theirs between ages 16-17.