5 days to make him fancy me!

[Workdate]

I am very aware that I sound like a love smitten 12 year old!

There is a guy at my work who I have a massive crush on.
He is gorgeous and we get on very well.

I will not go in to too much detail as it’s outing but it is against the rules to have a relationship with clients.

I have kept the relationship professional and I have to be very careful about what I say because I could lose my job over it (no man is worth that), so there’s a big chance that he has no idea that I fancy him.

The issue is is that he’s leaving on Friday.

Once he leaves, it would be less frowned upon to have a relationship but we would have no way of contacting each other, unless we found one another on SM but both of us may think that it’s overstepping the mark.

I don’t know if he even likes me, so my first question is how would I know this?

My second question is what can I do to make him like me/ensure he knows I like him without it being unprofessional?

My third question is if it turns out we both like each other, how can we meet outside of work, without discussing it during work which is against the rules?

It's not true that she has nothing to lose and rule breaking can be serious. What she has to lose is her job and potentially career, depending on the exact industry. I'm not allowed to be friends with clients for at least two years after I finish working with them.

It’s inappropriate due to the health setting. No different to a Dr wanting to date someone who had an ingrown toenail (so isn’t vulnerable) even though they have now switched doctors. It’s still a situation where the attraction has potentially grown out of the setting rather than naturally.

Clearly you don’t know what you’re talking about,rules are there to be adhered to not glibly ignored because back in the day your pal married a patient
This really is not a just go for it thing. If the op is registered AHP it is most definitely not on to date expatients,hence the workplace rules

Honestly, you sound like a school teacher counting down the minutes until his favourite pupil graduates high school.

I don't know what on earth the activity is or your role in it, but clearly, fancy him as much as you like, this is inappropriate.

It's cringe making - as is most of the advice.

I second theses two suggestions:

• book swap with email address inside
• tell him you’ll be at X coffee shop at xy time. Then turn up at his friend’s place

What a bizarre and silly thread. Sorry OP but you need to grow up.

@PurpleSky300 c'mon have a little romance in you, you only live once!

Christ,yes the cringey meet cute, suggestiond,pop your phone number in a book Accidentally run into him.Blah Blah. They all missed the bit where she disclosed he’s a patient/client and she’s staff.

Has he shared anything else about himself that assists you bumbing into him?
Could you direct any conversations about favourite local pubs, parks that are great to run in, good local food markets, concerts people are going to, etc.
Then you could frequent that pub, run in that park, shop at that market or go to that ballet.
I would not swap numbers at work because it would be for work related purposes - therefore promoting a furthering of your business relationship.

I would make a point of stating that, as you are all severing the client relationship, if you were to bump into each other in future you would no longer be their consultant.

People make their own luck and fortune favours the brave.

Can't quite see the problem if client relationship is ending?

I wouldn't recommend jumping him but don't see the problem with giving him your tel # AFTER course finishes in case he has any questions?

You could tell him you are going for coffee on a specific date, time and place, and say if he was there it would be nice to see him…

if he shows up , you have a date !

My first thought was LinkedIn but the more I read your updates and this is not that kind of client, it seems
massively inappropriate and unprofessional. I would stay clear.

The title of your thread is slightly at odds: hopefully he already finds you attractive, and you’re not on a mission to seduce him.

It's so hard to know how unethical it is without fully knowing the nature but if you're an OT I think it's a concern that you're asking how to get him to fancy you while you're still working with him. That sounds hugely inappropriate.

If it was a simple PT/ client relationship you'd say on the thread so it appears there is more to the dynamic.

If the OP is caring for him, this whole scenario is highly inappropriate, end of.

Crikey!! It’s like we’re living in Maoist China.. rules about who you can approach for a date, whether it’s appropriate to let someone know you fancy them!! So crazy!!

So long as it’s not an adult/ minor relationship, so long as it’s not abusive let adults get on with it.

she’s waited until their professional relationship has ended. She hasn’t jumped in him in in the treatment room!!

yes corporations will make rules to protect their ass… Human Resources will write rules.. but let human adults be human adults 🙄

If it's a healthcare/therapy role to 'make him fancy me' during his last few days, as OP wants to, would be highly inappropriate. As would passing him her number.

"5 days to make him fancy me" as a title and then the gradual drip feed about who he is to you OP, makes you wrong x 1 M.

This has obviously been on your mind for quite some time, it's premeditated and you are purposefully trying to flout your professional Code of Conduct.

putting the scenario on here and discussing it with randoms on the internet as if to legitimise your actions to find ways of making him fancy you makes it even more sleazy.

corporations will make rules to protect their ass…

not true, the OP works for an organisation under some sort of professional code of conduct. There are ethics involved, standards that ensure people in power positions are absolutely clear on boundaries and lines that aren't to be crossed. The OP wants to find ways to flout those set limits, and is very clear what they're doing here.

"There's a guy at my work" sounds a bit misleading. He's actually a client or a patient.

In my healthcare role it is definitely unethical to pursue a relationship currently. But once he leaves on Friday surely fair game then?
It's likely up to you to instigate a conversation "add me on social, you'll find me on LinkedIn... " etc

She's not waiting until the professional relationship ends. She wants to know how to make him fancy her whilst he's still her patient.

@Workdate

You wrote this -

"He told me he goes to a certain place every week because his friend owns it but it’s in his area and I feel it would be odd to just turn up when he knows I know he’s going to be there.

He could have been telling me because he’s just being friendly or he could have been hinting (but that might be me trying to reach lol)."

To me that's a huge hint from him he'd like to see you again and making a subtle suggestion for where and when you can find him without breaking the rules of the company . He's doing exactly what many of the PP on here are suggesting you do and you just aren't taking his hint!

So just say something like "it has been really nice working with you on xxx, So are you planning to be at your friends' pub (or whatever it is) next Friday?

It is quite blatant, but not breaking rules, and he will either say yes, I am - and then you have your date and time but without organising an actual "date" - or he will just give you a puzzled look. You're not breaking the rules or giving him your contact information directly, and it sounds from what you say there's no true ethical reason not to meet up, it is just your company is keen not to end up looking like a high class dating agency (or similar!)

🙄🙄🙄

What are your shared niche interests?