5 days to make him fancy me!

[Workdate]

I am very aware that I sound like a love smitten 12 year old!

There is a guy at my work who I have a massive crush on.
He is gorgeous and we get on very well.

I will not go in to too much detail as it’s outing but it is against the rules to have a relationship with clients.

I have kept the relationship professional and I have to be very careful about what I say because I could lose my job over it (no man is worth that), so there’s a big chance that he has no idea that I fancy him.

The issue is is that he’s leaving on Friday.

Once he leaves, it would be less frowned upon to have a relationship but we would have no way of contacting each other, unless we found one another on SM but both of us may think that it’s overstepping the mark.

I don’t know if he even likes me, so my first question is how would I know this?

My second question is what can I do to make him like me/ensure he knows I like him without it being unprofessional?

My third question is if it turns out we both like each other, how can we meet outside of work, without discussing it during work which is against the rules?

You could go there when you’re ‘in the area’ with a friend. If he’s there, he’s bound to say hello, and it won’t look as obvious if you have a friend with you.

What about the library? Casually mention you go there Saturday afternoon, for example, to check out new books.

Oo I like this . Clever .

No idea if he’s married? As staff she can read his file, see his personal,details, nok,marital status, medication list
She can most certainly see if he’s married amongst other things, that’s the power imbalance. She has access to information about him. He knows nothing about her

I agree with the lend a book when he goes if that’s been a shared interest. I wouldn’t put my number or email address in it though lol, seems a bit desperate. But offer to lend a book and he knows where to find you if he chooses to return it and continue any type of relationship with you. If he likes you, he will bring it back.

For the others telling you to get a grip etc, ignore them. Life’s too short and if it’s all above board re. Your job then the universe will take care of the rest. Good luck :)

OP, are you a Gladiator and he's a Challenger?
Are you Davina McCall and he's a Traitor??
Are you Pru and he's a Baker????

I actually think you're a PT on something like army basic training. In which case, won't he get posted off to some random location soon anyway?

If it is something like that I don't really think it's unethical, so it's just about plausible deniability. Just flirt like mad but in a way no one can pin on you for a week 😅

Best of luck!

Yes. The universe will take care of you. Universe fills the fridge and magic’s away all one’s troubles. Universe has a magic money tree. You don’t need frippery like a job when you have the universe

out of interest, if it’s not above board,if it all goes awry does universe step in and step up

@SMom88 does universe pay your bills?does universe pay the utilities and leave you special money beans? If one passively defers to the universe,are all financial and social expectations met?

People are making so many assumptions about the OP?

This could be a horse riding residential school or a writers retreat or something for all we know.

@Zone2NorthLondon
Are you ok? I started reading your response but couldn’t be bothered finishing it, sarcasm can be so boring especially when it’s got a nasty undertone.

Looks like you have lots of questions for me so I’ll respond (so you can relax a bit).

It’s just a way of saying “what will be will be.” No need to be so literal but take from it what you will.

Now back to focusing on OP and her question rather than going at other people on this thread.

I’m smiling at your writers retreat idea. Have you ever been on one?

I think just one male-only writer’s retreat would be rare, let alone a conveyor belt of male-only writers’ retreats as apparently happens where the OP with works.

The OP has made it pretty clear there’s a sports and/or health element going on. She has a bus load of new male clients regularly.

More of a thriller than a romcom - but it's very like Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit!

Ok? Certainly am,because I don’t adhere to or recommend passive mumbo jumbo like universe or what will be will be to myself or others

When you post on a discursive thread expect to be asked to elaborate or justify posts. That is genuinely how it works, somewhat like a conversation.there is an exchange a dialogue.

Seeing you raised wellbeing…Are you ok? Is all that what will be will be bearing down too much? Need a rest?

Ooh I think I’ve guessed what your job is @Workdate

I think you’re a dancer and teach ballet or other dance to footballers at a special retreat for them.

@Zone2NorthLondon Hello there, I don’t think the purpose of these posts is to try and ridicule people. I’m not too sure why you’re getting so upset here.

I’m simply suggesting that OP lends the book and leaves it up to him to reciprocate in some way rather than trying to further make it happen hence the “what will be will be.” A simple suggestion that doesn’t require further investigation in my view.

On a parting thought, perhaps OP might have a space at her retreat for you. Might be good to loosen up a little and perhaps have some therapy.

I have no interest in engaging with your rant-like communications any further, so I won’t respond again. All the best

@SMom88 you’re somewhat vexed. Perhaps see what the universe suggests to decrease your obvious consternation

Against the rules!?!
Sounds like a dictatorship!

Do you have any friends that live in his area? You could organise a meet up with them at the place he said he goes to. Then see if anything naturally progresses. Doesn't seem like you've broken any work rules that way. I'd leave it a few weeks though so as not to look a bit too keen, and give some time because of the work rules.

If you want to find him on social media, Im sure one if your friends outside work could help you. I can usually find someone in a few minutes based on very little details 🤣

If this guy is leaving soon, I'd wish him well and just say , hears my number incase you ever want to catch up.
Nothing ventured,nothing gained.
If he likes you too,then I'm sure he would be happy of the approach.
If he's an OK person then I'm sure he would stay quiet about it if the feelings are not mutual.
Good luck and dont let silly rules stand in the way of potential happiness.

If he's interested he knows where you are and will find a way I'm sure, as others have said if it was a bloke wanting to be in contact with a client everyone would be having a go as it being inappropriate, Fate has a funny way of showing itself so just let it go for now and if it's meant to be, it will. 🤞

I was thinking Top Gun.

Please keep us updated with what happens.

@Knitgoodwoman no need to guess, OP has said its an OT type role, involves retreats for sporting enthusiasts.

Ahh yes,don’t let silly rules stop you drooling over the patients. Rules Schmules.
i mean it’s only your job and well he’s…a man! Us women we must not let silly rules keep us away from hot men. I mean what’s the worst that can happen if you break the silly rules…

You have strengthened my point.
Thank you.

Give him your number/email address in a farewell card when he leaves. That way he can get in touch if he wants to. You could write that you’d love to stay in touch and catch up for a drink after he’s gone.