Tidy up shithole house weekend pics included

[Shamefullhouse]

I have been posting for a while now about my house being a shithole and trying to get on top of it,

Me and my family have been through alot. That has lasted years there's practically been no rest from it one thing after another. Its been absolutely hell. To the extent i could not even bath/shower on a regular basis. I had no support and was coping with everything alone its been awful. It gos pretty deep .

But things are getting better. But because its been so long my mind /emotions find it hard to believe. So I'm trying to get myself into a better mindset.

One of them things is to get my house clean and tidy and for it to feel nice to be in. I have done alot. But I also keep slipping backwards. So although it's better than one I first started I'm stuck because I keep slipping back.

I add shame photos because it pushes me to get it done and that's how I feel just now because I have basicly fucked up since Christmas and I'm angry for slipping backwards.

The picture of the really bad small room is a spare room . It's crap from my children's bedroom when I decorated it. I dumped crap in the spare room .

You've come so far and you keep on going! I agree with everyone else saying to give yourself more credit.

I don't think it will take you too long to tidy and clean.

Going forward - can your dc help tidy up at the end of the day or once a week? We used to do Team Tidy Up with some music while I barked instructions and see how much we could get done in 3 songs.

All this going up and down stairs and moving things around - it sounds like a free workout! Looking forward to your next posts from Project Deshittification😁

I will touch on the DC situation just for a min. The 2 youngest ds . Yes they can help out a bit . They have been doing really well with keeping their room tidy . But the 8 year old finds it really hard. He has autism and finds simple instructions of what he's meant to do. Then the 7 year old gets upset because he seems to end up doing more than the 8 year old. So I Need to give that some thought. Maybe visual reminders or something.

Teen dd . Job is meant to be tidy her room, landing and bathroom. She gets 10.00 a week as long as that's done. But its slacked over past few weeks because of me to be honest. So once I'm on top of that . Hopefully today we can get back into that.

Teen ds: is a very hit and miss situation. On a positive note. He does his own washing, tidy his room. Often does his own cooking.

But he can be very aggressive and controlling and it causes alot of stress and upset. An example could be Teen dd is tidying her room and has music on whilst doing it. There may be some type of noise banging through the floor due to moving things or something dropped etc . Ds will then become very aggressive and nasty. But then he can have his music and a heavy bass on that shakes the house.

Things are definitely better compared to what they were. But it was such a massive awful situation that emotionally and mentally I'm still there. So it takes me alot of courage just to say to ds. Can you stop dumping your crap on the landing or in my room . Or at least take it to the bins the same day.

There has been /is professional help with all this. I just wanted to touch on why it's not so easy to ask the kids for help and what it can lead to. I am working on it though.

I'm not going to say to much more about that part of the situation as it really upsets me and I want the thread to stay positive

🤣 that could be my next username.

I Just thinking about it feels like a work out 😭

Hope it’s going well for you this morning. I’ve commented on your previous posts with a different username myself so you may not recognise me. Keep at it, you really have done so well over these last few months, I completely get you when you say you feel you need it all sorted before you feel able to keep on top of it, I find that too.

Thank you . I only started 20 mins ago . I'm sitting down again. But I have got most of the crap out of the spare room. Its going in the right direction

My hall way stinks 😭

What of? Do you have any windows you can open?

I’ve just done 20 mins of kitchen/diner. I’m knackered. A lot of it was condensing Christmas shit and finding it a home.

It stinks of dog. I did not realise. I noticed as I was coming down the stairs. I'm gonna have to give it a really good clean.

I’ve seen far worse tbh. Just pick stuff up from the floor as a start. You’ll be fine x

Windows open if you can, for at least 20 mins x

I'm in my butt again for a bit. Teen ds I in my face and won't leave me alone . I made it clear that adult dd and her 2 kids can not come in. I have to much to do . I don't want all the crap that comes with it. But mum can't they just ..... no I don't want it .

Then he's bugging me for a take away several times no. Then 10 mins later can't we just get snacks from the shop. Again no. He's just had 50.00 this morning to fix his phone screen. He needs to leave me wtf alone.

So im doing nothing till he vanishes. Because everytime I do something he's gonna be at me.

I think its from my small dog peeing on the floor on in the hall. He does ot mostly at night so time I see it in the morning it's been there a while. I clean it but I should think some soaks through. There's no point in me replacing it until he's properly clean at night. I could probably roll it up clean under it and on top . To try get rid of the smell. He has got better compared to what he was so it's going in the right direction.

Bicarbonate of soda is supposed to be good, but honestly fresh air is your friend here. I have two dogs and I am paranoid of a doggy smell, always have the windows open when I can xx

OP I've been on MN for around 14 years and I've never said this to anyone but you are a true inspiration!

I love your honesty surrounding the mess, the muddle you sometimes get yourself into and the problems you've had/have with your DC.

If only all of us on Mumsnet were this honest about our lives, or how we can sometimes find ourselves in less than ideal situations, this forum wouldn't be anywhere near as fake or as judgey as it often is.

So I just wanted to say thank you. I think you should become an influencer or something!

Can you not keep a bin liner in the hall and a cardboard box for recycling and put it all in one place then every time you go downstairs take rubbish or recycling out? Unless you have a huge house you don't need bin liners and recycling in each room. Find one spot and get rid of it every few days.

Just not letting stuff stay on the floor will help keep it clear and make it easy to hoover. Dirty clothes go in a laundry bin and clean ones get folded up and put in a drawer, when the washing is try find a space for the airers and laundry basket to live.

Get the kids used to putting their toys away at the end of each day. Same with clothes and sports bags etc.

Decluttering and get rid of stuff you do not use regularly. The less stuff you have the easier it is to keep surfaces and floors clear and to keep on top of cleaning and hoovering.

Oh and mix up a spray bottle of Zoflora and water to kill the dog's pee smell. Mine occasionally gets caught short when I'm out and this has been a Godsend.

The kitchen looks great. You do have obstacles to cleanliness and tidiness if you have four children and 2 dogs? You say you get breathless going upstairs. Do you live in a flat or a house and do you have a health issue? The dogs will be smelly so it is more important to stay on top of the house. Surely you have to take them out regularly so can you not empty bins at the same time so do two jobs at once?

Aww thank you 😊. Believe me I have had some real nastiness on here. But I don't care. I know that I am a strong person. If I had not been I would not be here now. I also know that I'm real. I need to be honest to myself otherwise what's the point.

Thank you really lovely of you to say that 💐

I really wish it was that easy 😭

Thank you I will do. I have some 👍

The nasty people need to remember this could've been them if their lives had taken a different turn 🤷‍♂️

But it takes far more strength to be honest and to try to turn your life around, than it does to be nasty.

Problem is . It will never happen to them. And yes I agree .

But I think it takes alot of effort to be nasty . I can't be arsed to be nasty even if someone has been to me. Its to much effort.

Your kitchen looks great, well done!

I find the endless repetition of jobs really annoying. I've finally accepted I need to clean the kitchen every day, or even twice a day, no matter how dull.

I've ditched as much stuff as possible and moved as much off the surfaces as possible so it's all easier to keep clean.

Also things have to be really easy to put away or else they just get piled up somewhere else.

I sweep with a long handled dustpan and brush so it looks much better even if I know I haven't mopped for a (really) long time. (No 5 second rule here, if food touches the floor you have to assume it's contaminated with something awful and bin it!)

I've found the A Slob Comes Clean podcast brilliant for this type of thing. Dana is a self confessed slob and has come up with ways to help herself and it works brilliantly for me too. I put a podcast on my phone and she hypnotises me into sorting my house out!

Good luck, you're doing really well!

Forgot to say, I use Dr Beckmann Pet Stain & Odour Remover, it worked pretty well when my cat dribbled wee on a fabric sofa!