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To think this is a bizarre overreaction over a chip shop?

194 replies

MiamiWindMachine · 07/01/2024 12:40

A long-term friend came to stay with me this weekend. She has never been the most adaptable of people, but this weekend I have honestly become worried about her failure to cope with the most minor of setbacks.

I went to meet her at my local station on Friday night. We were going out later, so we decided to drop off her bags, have something quick to eat and then go. She said, “Ooh, can we go to that nice chip shop we went to last time?” I said, “Oh no, we can’t - it closed unfortunately”.

I can only describe her reaction as utter bewilderment. She looked at me in complete confusion and said, “Closed? What do you mean, it closed?” It was like she’d never heard the word before. I just said, “Yes, it closed down a couple of months ago”. She’s still giving me the bewildered look. “But… it was REALLY nice!” I said, “Yes, it’s a shame… shall we get a Subway or something?”.

She was still looking at me like I’d just told her her house had burned down. She started this weird muttering. “Closed, closed… it CAN’T be closed; it can’t have just closed. Are you sure it’s closed? Maybe it was just shut when you went past”. I was getting pretty fed up by now, but as the (very much closed) chip shop is right by the station, I took her across the road to show her. She just peered through the window in disbelief, as if she could somehow make the chips appear through sheer force of will. She started saying maybe it wasn’t permanent, maybe they’d just gone on holiday… how that would have helped us that night, I’ve no idea.

I’d had enough now - I just wanted to go to grab some food. I said to her, “Look. The shelves are empty. The fridges are empty. The windows are covered in dust. There are piles of junk mail in the doorway. It has CLOSED DOWN!!”

I eventually somehow got her to McDonalds, but she was still prattling under her breath about how she can’t believe it’s closed, it was REALLY nice, she was really looking forward to those chips… it was unhinged. The people who owned the bloody shop probably made less fuss than this about it closing.

I know it probably sounds funny, but I am honestly wondering if something is really wrong. This just isn’t a normal reaction to something so minor. As I said, she’s never been particularly adaptable - for example, if a train was cancelled, she’d spend more time complaining about it happening than she would looking at alternatives - but I’ve never known her go so overboard before, and all over something so inconsequential. She was fine for the rest of the weekend, but should I have had a word?

OP posts:
Dontfuckingsaycheese · 07/01/2024 15:11

Sounds like the time the bagel shop (in a different city where we’d travel to to do photo shoots) couldn’t do me a smoked ham and cream cheese bagel. I think I did have tears. I was looking forward to it so so much. Do get a little obsessed over a certain food. Practically dreaming about it it at least lying awake thinking about it. (don’t mean causing insomnia, just a pleasant thought to drift off to)

I was the same about something in my cousin’s wedding buffet. She’s since divorced and remarried but I still think of those cheesy beauties. They may have been jalapeño poppers! I just kept going back for more and craved them for weeks after.

She was really looking forward to her chips. It would take me a while to process such devastation 😟

Ponoka7 · 07/01/2024 15:12

People's traits can get worse as they age and it can be to their detriment. My sister has always been fussy and faffy. As she went into her 60's she started to convince herself that she was developing dementia, then a cognitive issue. She's been through every clinic possible. She's just aging badly. She put together a plan, joined more clubs and started to be around my GC more. It helped things. I'm not dismissing autism. I'm autistic and so is my adult DD. Even if she is there are ways that she can help herself. Keeping social connections and going outside your comfort zone is still important as we age. I'd be having chats with her about how she is, what's she's up to. I know that lockdown and her friends fears about mixing really set my sister back and put years on people.

rainbowsparkle28 · 07/01/2024 15:12

Sounds potentially like an indicator of neurodiversity perhaps?

ForTonightGodisaDJ · 07/01/2024 15:12

The people who owned the bloody shop probably made less fuss than this about it closing 😂

When you are depressed like me you get overly attached to to the few small pleasures you have in life. I'm still pretty pissed that my lovely local village shop closed down and now has reopened with new owners and is shite compared to what it was. I did rattle on about my discontent for quite a while...

User4363463 · 07/01/2024 15:13

She definitely sounds neurodivergent. Extremely normal reaction to a sensory experience (food) that you're very much looking forward to. It's pretty unkind to expose every detail of her "bizarre" behaviour to the internet especially as there cannot be any sinister intentions within that context.

cariadlet · 07/01/2024 15:13

I agree with those who have said that it's suggested that the inability to cope with a change of plans could be a sign of autism.

When I signed up to my gym, I was given an induction by one of the trainers.
Every Sunday, I would go to the gym and use the same pieces of equipment that he had showed me, in the same order and with the same number of reps.

I went away for a few weeks in the summer and forgot that during this time, the gym was going to be closed for refurbishment.

When I came back from my holiday, I walked into the gym and was really shocked. Some of the equipment was gone. New equipment was there. Old equipment was in the wrong place.

I could feel my heart racing and I felt very panicky but didn't understand why.

A couple of years later, I got my diagnosis of autism and this incident (and many others) now made sense to me.

I didn't find the op's first post funny. I could empathise with the friend. Whether she's autistic or not, she clearly found the situation stressful.

sofedupandtiredofthis · 07/01/2024 15:14

I hope she's not on MN as this is such a specific situation described in such detail that she'd most definitely recognise herself, poor woman.

Itwasafterallallaboutme · 07/01/2024 15:14

MoonWoman69 · 07/01/2024 14:50

One is Murgatroyds, restaurant and take away, near the airport, the other is on the A58 at Birkenshaw, just a little chippy run by a Chinese fella, but boy he knows his stuff!!! I used to love the chippy in Kippax!!! That was the only way I could be coaxed into going and seeing my SIL... Fish and chips from there and I was in!!! 🤣🤣🤣❤❤❤

Thank you MoonWoman, that's great - I'll start planning my trip this evening! 🤩❤️❤️❤️

Jackfrostnippingatmynose · 07/01/2024 15:17

Your friend being flummoxed and unable to adapt to change generally might mean she's ND, or that maybe she has a longing for chips, or shagged the old owner.
How does she cope at work?

JustACountryMusicGirlInCowboyBoots · 07/01/2024 15:18

I'm like this. Autistic. If I can't eat where I planned on eating or can't eat what I planned to eat then I'd rather not eat. It throws me completely. Dd is the same. There's nothing wrong with your friend.

NuNameNuMe · 07/01/2024 15:19

Yabu. I feel this way about Wilkos 😕

ChedderGorgeous · 07/01/2024 15:19

Daddy or chips ?

Winter3000 · 07/01/2024 15:19

That's not normal.

Some people are unable to accept things and move on, even minor things.

She does sound unhinged.

ChedderGorgeous · 07/01/2024 15:21

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Redlarge · 07/01/2024 15:22

Autism.

Back21970 · 07/01/2024 15:23

My first thought was that she fancies someone who works there?

That would I suppose be a bit understandable if she had been looking forward to seeing them.

Anything other than that is completely OTT - I mean surely there are other chip shops.

I am sniggering imagining you both looking in the window 🤣

SeatonCarew · 07/01/2024 15:24

PoinsettiaLives · 07/01/2024 12:41

Maybe she has a crush on the fish and chip man?

That was my immediate thought!

ChedderGorgeous · 07/01/2024 15:24

Tbh there's something fishy about this whole tale.

JustACountryMusicGirlInCowboyBoots · 07/01/2024 15:26

@ChedderGorgeous having autism doesn't mean there is something wrong with someone Angry

cariadlet · 07/01/2024 15:27

Some of the disablist comments on this thread are disgusting.
Calling her "unhinged". Saying that if she's autistic, then there is something wrong with her FFS!

I'm autistic. There's nothing wrong with me. I just have a brain which works differently from the brains of neurotypical people.

Racist and homophobic comments would be (rightly) condemned but it seems to be ok to come out with disablist crap.

HalliwellManor · 07/01/2024 15:28

Sounds like she has a real chip on her shoulder tbh.

JustACountryMusicGirlInCowboyBoots · 07/01/2024 15:28

@cariadlet it's disgusting isn't it.

Butchyrestingface · 07/01/2024 15:29

@MiamiWindMachine She only came to see you cos she wanted to go to that chip shop. Sorry, mate.

WeAreOnTheRoadToNowhere · 07/01/2024 15:31

I can feel the loss of minor things although I can, and do, laugh at myself. DC diagnosed ASD so I suspect I am too
10 years ago I had a minor op and had to stay in overnight. I was offered a cup of tea in the evening and accepted it. The lady opposite asked for horlicks and was given it. I would have had horlicks if I knew it was on offer and I still feel slightly miffed😄
I drank many cups of horlicks until I was sick of it but it never compensated
I know it's not reasonable or rational

ChedderGorgeous · 07/01/2024 15:32

There's a plaice and a thyme to be crabby about a washed up shop. No need for her to fry about it.

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