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To think this is a bizarre overreaction over a chip shop?

194 replies

MiamiWindMachine · 07/01/2024 12:40

A long-term friend came to stay with me this weekend. She has never been the most adaptable of people, but this weekend I have honestly become worried about her failure to cope with the most minor of setbacks.

I went to meet her at my local station on Friday night. We were going out later, so we decided to drop off her bags, have something quick to eat and then go. She said, “Ooh, can we go to that nice chip shop we went to last time?” I said, “Oh no, we can’t - it closed unfortunately”.

I can only describe her reaction as utter bewilderment. She looked at me in complete confusion and said, “Closed? What do you mean, it closed?” It was like she’d never heard the word before. I just said, “Yes, it closed down a couple of months ago”. She’s still giving me the bewildered look. “But… it was REALLY nice!” I said, “Yes, it’s a shame… shall we get a Subway or something?”.

She was still looking at me like I’d just told her her house had burned down. She started this weird muttering. “Closed, closed… it CAN’T be closed; it can’t have just closed. Are you sure it’s closed? Maybe it was just shut when you went past”. I was getting pretty fed up by now, but as the (very much closed) chip shop is right by the station, I took her across the road to show her. She just peered through the window in disbelief, as if she could somehow make the chips appear through sheer force of will. She started saying maybe it wasn’t permanent, maybe they’d just gone on holiday… how that would have helped us that night, I’ve no idea.

I’d had enough now - I just wanted to go to grab some food. I said to her, “Look. The shelves are empty. The fridges are empty. The windows are covered in dust. There are piles of junk mail in the doorway. It has CLOSED DOWN!!”

I eventually somehow got her to McDonalds, but she was still prattling under her breath about how she can’t believe it’s closed, it was REALLY nice, she was really looking forward to those chips… it was unhinged. The people who owned the bloody shop probably made less fuss than this about it closing.

I know it probably sounds funny, but I am honestly wondering if something is really wrong. This just isn’t a normal reaction to something so minor. As I said, she’s never been particularly adaptable - for example, if a train was cancelled, she’d spend more time complaining about it happening than she would looking at alternatives - but I’ve never known her go so overboard before, and all over something so inconsequential. She was fine for the rest of the weekend, but should I have had a word?

OP posts:
Nineteendays · 07/01/2024 13:27

I liked how you wrote that op. I’ve no idea what’s going on with your friend though

PonyPatter44 · 07/01/2024 13:27

Chip shops are so varied - some are awesome, and some are vile. I bet she'd been looking forward to the really good chips for ages.

Fairyliz · 07/01/2024 13:27

This is my autistic daughter too. She is happy to eat any kind of cuisine but wants to know plans in advance.
So if we plan to go to the Indian restaurant but they don’t have any tables available she will have a mini breakdown, irrespective of the fact that there are tables at three other restaurants nearby all of which she likes.

mrswhiplington · 07/01/2024 13:29

eandz13 · 07/01/2024 12:46

I reacted similarly when I discovered Mr Chips in Cork had closed. Miserable I was!

😃

Gotsomedebt · 07/01/2024 13:31

Psychonabike · 07/01/2024 13:19

Another vote for female undiagnosed autism.

I guess she had The Plan set up in her mind all day while travelling and the unexpected change was unsettling and momentarily intolerable. Travelling can be stressful and draining enough, so she might not have had the spoons to engage her usual social masking.

My first thought, too.

Yesterday, I planned to clean and tidy the garden, weed, etc. I needed to use the hose as part of this plan.

I got changed into my old manky clothes and went downstairs, told DH what I was going to do, and he said, "Well, you can't use the hose. It's broken."

I was devastated. I didn't know what to do. I then spent half the day in bed, trying to adjust and get over the change of plan. I wasn't prepared for it, and it really messed me up.

Probably the same situation for your friend - in her head, she'd planned to have chips from this place, and when she found out it was closed, she wasn't prepared for the change of plan and didn't know how to deal with it.

ANiceBigCupOfTea · 07/01/2024 13:34

kiwiaddict · 07/01/2024 12:56

Sounds like female undiagnosed autism

My first thought too.

ScrantonDunderMifflin · 07/01/2024 13:35

''The people who owned the bloody shop probably made less fuss than this about it closing.'' 😂😂🤣🤣😂🤣🤣

Snorkmaidenn · 07/01/2024 13:35

Is she pregnant? I remember craving chips with curry sauce when I was pregnant.

MoonWoman69 · 07/01/2024 13:36

To be fair, decent chippies are hard to find... I live in Leeds and can only tolerate 2 - one of which is 2 miles away but always really busy, the other one about 10 miles away and we have to scoff them in the car...
I don't think it sounds like she was joking though, it's a total overreaction to something quite trivial. But then maybe she had such a lovely time last time, she wanted to replicate it, bit for bit...
I love how quickly people jump on the autism track! I could simply be that she was stressed about something, she was looking forward to her weekend and finding out the chippy had shut down, derailed her somewhat! Some people just can't accept that things happen, I think we may have all done similar to a certain extent over things. But maybe not as prolonged as this though!

RM2013 · 07/01/2024 13:37

It does seem a bit bizarre but maybe she’s having a hard time at the moment and she was looking forward to those chips from that chips shop the whole train journey!!!

BorgQueen · 07/01/2024 13:41

I can relate, I almost go into meltdown mode when supermarkets change all the aisles around and nothing is where it’s supposed to be, my brain can’t cope and I just shut down.
Same when I’m travelling and something happens differently than the scenario that’s in my head.
I remember once we had a run out in the Derbyshire countryside and went to where there used to be a lovely little farm, cafe and craft centre with donkeys, llamas and pygmy goats in the field. We pulled up outside and it was virtually derelict with no sign the place had ever existed,
I stood there rooted to the spot, DH thought I’d had a stroke or something, I was just repeating ‘where is it’ ‘how can it be gone’ over and over. I even searched online when I got home and there is literally no evidence it ever existed. It really upset me.

JingleSnowmanTree · 07/01/2024 13:41

Rokuandice · 07/01/2024 13:01

Sorry to hijack but..This could almost be me..I have just returned home (London) after visiting friends in Staffordshire. Literally as soon as I got off the train, I wanted scallops from a particular chip shop there. It was closed for the whole 5 days I was there and reopened the day after I left. My mouth is still watering at the thought of them and my so called friends have sent me photos of scallops they have bought since I left 🤣 (barstools!). Why oh why does no one sell potato scallops down south?

@Rokuandice I'd have stayed (at least) another night!

in NZ they make potato fritters, they're Sooo Good, they're a rarity in the U.K. (not sure but maybe your potato scallops are a similar thing??) & if you find them here theyre just not the same.

next time I go back I'm going to go to the beach & eat as many as I want. Fuck the fact there are more carbs in one than I'd usually eat in a week!!!

Sparklfairy · 07/01/2024 13:41

I must admit my reactions to restaurants closing has been a little more extreme post-COVID. Only slightly! But in my city there has been quite a few 'surprise' permanent closures of really very good restaurants, they just couldn't survive the pandemic. I often walk down the high street and lament the loss of an old favourite, maybe she was being a bit like me, but not using her inside voice like I do Wink

yellowsmileyface · 07/01/2024 13:42

I also suspect possibly a combination of undiagnosed autism and just really fancying some chips. I know how disappointed I can get when I'm really craving something specific and it's not an option.

I don't see the point in saying anything though. Whenever wondering whether you should address something, you should consider "what do I hope to gain from this?", and it seems to me there isn't much to gain, she'd likely just end up feeling self conscious about it.

AInightingale · 07/01/2024 13:42

Wait until she finds out about Quality Street's new wrappers.

wronginalltherightways · 07/01/2024 13:43

CucumberBagel · 07/01/2024 13:11

She sounds autistic. You sound not very nice or tolerant.

OP sounds perfectly nice and quite tolerant to go out of her way to show her guest that the chip shop had indeed closed down. She wasn't just denying her chips.

BorgQueen · 07/01/2024 13:43

I’m in (North) Staffordshire and I’ve never heard them called ‘scallops’ . They are either fritters or ‘smacks’.
Scallops are seafood.

howdoesyourgardengrowinmay · 07/01/2024 13:44

There's not really a lot you can do about it if she's going to over-react like that for no apparent reason.
Perhaps you could 'manage' her behaviour ie do or say (or say nothing) whatever it takes for her to get through the shock of the chip shop closing and move on as quickly as possible. Hopefully you don't have to put up with this too often?

Psychonabike · 07/01/2024 13:45

@MoonWoman69

I love how quickly people jump on the autism track!

There's always someone pointing this out, like ND is incredibly rare and not just an every day consideration.

The thing is that different neurotypes are all around us, incredibly common, and it actually makes much more sense as an explanation than all the holes in the swiss cheese leading to someone just being bizarre or weird.

Every time a poster reminds someone to think about neurodiversity, we're a bit closer to everyone being a little more aware and more accepting...and hopefully, fewer posts about other people's "bizarre" behaviour.

It's not so long ago that we were having to remind people that some people are gay, that some surgeons are women etc etc...

PrincessScarlett · 07/01/2024 13:45

She sounds like Gibby and her cream tea obsession

MiamiWindMachine · 07/01/2024 13:45

whynotwhatknot · 07/01/2024 13:11

i was upset when a chip shop closed in my dh village wher ehe grew up bloody great fish and chips

i ddnt go and stand outside staring at it though

This is the thing - the great chip shop in a village you’ll probably visit fairly regularly is understandable. My friend probably comes down twice a year!

OP posts:
rainingsnoring · 07/01/2024 13:49

Apologies as I haven't read the thread but could she have undiagnosed autism? Her reaction strongly makes me wonder about this.

KirstenBlest · 07/01/2024 13:49

Not RTFT. She was only visiting you so that she could go to the chip shop. Good chips are hard to find.

cerisepanther73 · 07/01/2024 13:51

L.O.l. 😄

JingleSnowmanTree · 07/01/2024 13:51

rainingsnoring · 07/01/2024 13:49

Apologies as I haven't read the thread but could she have undiagnosed autism? Her reaction strongly makes me wonder about this.

@rainingsnoring

only about 2/3rds of the posts have mentioned it!! 😂😂😂

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