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Would you resent a colleague who has this ‘privilege’

681 replies

Resentedpumpkin · 18/12/2023 16:49

Which is actually a reasonable adjustment?

Asd and adhd plus ME - I’m needing more and more breaks due to ASD and avoiding shutdown. It’s been agreed on my return after 2 weeks off (shutdown and selective mutism) . So now when it gets too much I’m able to log off (if WFH) or leave my desk for up to 30 mins as many times as needed per day.

it’s been once or twice a day but yesterday happened 4 times (10 mins, 30 mins, 25 mins and 5 mins)

Had some sarcastic and off remarks about it from others and now just feeling shit and embarrassed. Everyone is aware of my conditions so it’s not like they don’t know

OP posts:
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Resentedpumpkin · 18/12/2023 16:50

Sorry the whole point of the ‘privilege’ was because one person had said I was getting ‘privileges’ but it’s not as I’m not better off due to it it’s a reasonable adjustment to keep me level with everyone and functioning not to give me more

OP posts:
escapethemaze · 18/12/2023 16:50

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FacingTheWall · 18/12/2023 16:51

Not if you’re still getting your work done. It stops being ‘reasonable’ if you can’t complete your work. However, that’s between you and your employer, not colleagues.

escapethemaze · 18/12/2023 16:51

where do you go?
For how long?

and does your absence means others are overloaded?

LogicVoid · 18/12/2023 16:51

do you make the time up?

Treesinmygarden · 18/12/2023 16:52

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Aren't you a charmer!!!

I assume this is an OH recommendation and it's nobody's business but yours and your employer's.

Sartre · 18/12/2023 16:52

I wouldn’t enjoy this personally. When you’re working as a team, everyone needs to pull equal weight so if one member is constantly disrupting the work flow by disappearing for 30 min breaks or whatever, that would get annoying. I can understand your colleague’s frustration.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 18/12/2023 16:52

FacingTheWall · 18/12/2023 16:51

Not if you’re still getting your work done. It stops being ‘reasonable’ if you can’t complete your work. However, that’s between you and your employer, not colleagues.

This

Resentedpumpkin · 18/12/2023 16:52

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But how is it different to someone being up and down for example of they are back to work from mat leave and expressing milk or similar ? Or any other reason that needs a reasonable adjustment? If I can’t do this then I’ll end up off again and that affects the team a lot more

OP posts:
DeedlessIndeed · 18/12/2023 16:54

I suppose it's been agreed as a reasonable adjustment, so it's a moot point to some extent.

However, I think the way it has been handled by your management team might change how I felt about it.

It must be really hard for you, but if others have to take on additional duties I can also see how they might be getting frustrated.

PP made a good point, if you're able to make up time / work that might help ease relations?

Resentedpumpkin · 18/12/2023 16:54

LogicVoid · 18/12/2023 16:51

do you make the time up?

No as was told it’s not necessary as that then adds to my stress . It’s being reviewed after 8 weeks

OP posts:
Antsinmypantsneedtodance · 18/12/2023 16:55

I think it depends on the job a bit. In an office well who'd even notice or care? In every office i've worked in the tea round took 30 mins and some people would do it 6 times a day! We had one person who'd find and excuse to go find someone/something/collect the post and then sneak off for a vape for 20 mins or so.

If a call centre and your calls are redirected to a colleague I can see this being more frustrating.

Thetwilightscone · 18/12/2023 16:55

What kind of work do you do that your colleagues even notice when you’re gone?

Azandme · 18/12/2023 16:56

If you're doing the job properly, then no, I wouldn't have any issue.

If you are not able to do the fulfill the role to the same level as your colleagues, then I'd be put out, because reasonable adjustments are made to ensure that an individual can do the job.

If you have reasonable adjustments and are still not able to perform to the same level, then I can see why they may be miffed that you are on the same pay etc.

escapethemaze · 18/12/2023 16:57

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AlmondButterToast · 18/12/2023 16:57

I wouldn't worry about reasonable adjustments a colleague has in place or their work- that's for them to work out with occupational health and their manager. I want to work somewhere inclusive and diverse that supports staff and makes adjustments to allow them to stay in work and contribute to the team.

donquixotedelamancha · 18/12/2023 16:58

Make a note of all the comments, OP. Report each comment to your line manager and make sure they are minuted.

It is absolutely not OK for you to receive negative comments in relation to your medical conditions.

cheezncrackers · 18/12/2023 16:58

Depends what your job is and how your presence or lack thereof impacts everyone else. If they can't get stuff done or if they have to pick up your work while you're offline then I can see how that would cause resentment, particularly if it's an ongoing situation.

escapethemaze · 18/12/2023 16:58

you are totally in your rights to do this
you are doing nothing wrong
they don’t she a leg to stand on

BUT

if i wete you i would definitely be trying to make up a bit of time when i’m well here and there

Lizziegaskellrocks · 18/12/2023 16:59

I wouldn't even notice 😄 tbh whoever complains about your 'privilege' needs to wind their neck in. If they know about your condition and it's a reasonable OH adjustment it's got bugger all to do with them. They might benefit from some workplace training on this. You have a condition which you've disclosed and you are trying to do something about it by getting a reasonable adjustment which means you can do your job as per your t's and c's it's got naff all to do with anyone else as it's not a 'privilege' and I think whoever is complaining needs to be told to get back in their box.

Sluj · 18/12/2023 16:59

Is it the actual job that's causing you to need these breaks? Would you still need them if you had a different job?
I suppose if it's the job that's causing the difficulties, your colleagues would probably prefer it if you got another job and let someone else have the job that can commit to a full day. If it would be the same in any job, then they have to put up with it though I can see they might not understand the need and see it as unfair.

Alwaystired2023 · 18/12/2023 16:59

No - shouldn't be anyone's business apart from you and your manager. Your colleagues sound v tricky

escapethemaze · 18/12/2023 17:00

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hattie43 · 18/12/2023 17:00

That's more than a reasonable adjustment, puts too much pressure on other colleagues if they have to pick up the slack .

Hatty65 · 18/12/2023 17:00

The sarcastic remarks need to stop immediately. Speak to your manager and insist they are spoken to.

They might resent your 'privilege' in being ill, but ME is certainly no joke - and it falls under the Disability Act. They have absolutely no right to comment on adjustments that have been agreed. This needs making abundantly clear to them.