Page 12 | Should I report this?

secretsanta23 · 2023-12-14T08:15:17+00:00

At 7:40am we had someone ring our doorbell no less than 10 times and bang on the door. We assumed it was something serious so shot up, put clothes on and went downstairs. In that timeframe, we heard them try our door handle, bang the door and ring the doorbell several times again. It was a fucking delivery driver dropping off a parcel. I checked the security cameras and he did indeed try to see if our door was open. In what world is this acceptable? Why would you try to see if our door is unlocked? All lights were off and blinds closed because we were asleep! I'm half tempted to report this. Would you?

steppemum · 14/12/2023 16:15

FrontEnd · 14/12/2023 16:12

Wow this thread is nuts. Some really spiteful and ignorant comments being made towards OP. Seems like having a front door is nothing more than an inconvenience in your zero crime (and zero empathy) areas. Happy for you.

"Be kind and let the uninvited strange man in your house with submissive gratitude else you're very, very bad...and by the way may your basic security boundaries be damned, witch!" Hilarious 😂

well the thing is, you didn't read the comments from the OP which have been deleted. (I think we are up to 4 or 5 now) Ones where she swore and ranted at people who simply disagreed with her.

I guess that is one disadvantage of deleting posts, those late to the thread don't read the batshittery that she wrote

Original poster

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 16:16

@steppemum batshit for defending myself against equally bad comments and people accusing me of wishing the man to lose his job.

Crazy that I should sit in silence and just allow the attacking posts towards me.

OP posts:

Movinghouseatlast · 14/12/2023 16:31

I'm sure that the person who complained about me didn't actually think I'd lose my job as a result, but I did.

Too long a story to explain but it was a man who took huge offence at something I said and decided to take it 'to the top' when his first complaint was ignored. He took what I said completely out of context. As I was on a freelance contract I was let go quietly. I lost my entire livelihood basically because one person was like a dog with a bone.

Original poster

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 16:32

@Movinghouseatlast I'm sorry that happened. That would never be my intention if I did end up complaining.

OP posts:

CatamaranViper · 14/12/2023 16:43

Movinghouseatlast · 14/12/2023 16:31

I'm sure that the person who complained about me didn't actually think I'd lose my job as a result, but I did.

Too long a story to explain but it was a man who took huge offence at something I said and decided to take it 'to the top' when his first complaint was ignored. He took what I said completely out of context. As I was on a freelance contract I was let go quietly. I lost my entire livelihood basically because one person was like a dog with a bone.

Considering it's just before Christmas I doubt they'd fire him at peak time, they need delivery people right now. If trying people's door handles is acceptable, then he won't get in any trouble anyways. If he's otherwise a good employee who has made a mistake then it'll be a slap on the wrist or some 'training' to ensure it doesn't happen again.

SantaBarbaraMonica · 14/12/2023 17:08

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 08:19

@Frasers someone trying to open your door isn't serious? Interesting.

Well let’s use a bit of judgement here. Do you think this delivery persons intention and plan was to murder you all? Or was it to feck the parcel inside? If the later, it’s not very smart of him and unpleasant for you, but does it merit you being the one getting him fired? If the former, then yes, definitely report.

Original poster

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 17:22

@SantaBarbaraMonica I don't care what it's for. Don't fry to open my door.

OP posts:

MassageForLife · 14/12/2023 17:28

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 16:16

@steppemum batshit for defending myself against equally bad comments and people accusing me of wishing the man to lose his job.

Crazy that I should sit in silence and just allow the attacking posts towards me.

Oh come now - if the comments were 'equally bad', they too would have been deleted.

Original poster

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 17:29

@MassageForLife why are you still here?

OP posts:

MassageForLife · 14/12/2023 17:32

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 17:29

@MassageForLife why are you still here?

Oh, I'm not 'still here'. I have been and gone and now I've popped back in to see what has been going on in my absence.

Some threads are worth coming back to, time and time again!

cardibach · 14/12/2023 18:41

saraclara · 14/12/2023 13:08

I'm bemused at the majority of the responses here. I normally find myself very much at the laid back end of what seems to be a super-safety conscious bunch of mums on here. But no way would I be happy with a delivery guy (for whom I have the utmost sympathy normally) trying to let himself in to my house.

The fact that it was locked doesn't make it okay. When he tried the door handle he didn't know it was locked and fully intended to let himself in had it not been.

7:40 is perfectly reasonable though. Especially at what is now a really busy time of year.

Let himself in? No. Open the door, place. A parcel, shut the door? Yes.
People are saying they don’t want randomers coming into their houses, and that’s perfectly sane. It’s not what is happening though. Saying you wouldn’t mind the postie doing this is not in any way saying you would be cool with any old person wandering in and helping themselves to stuff. It’s different issues.

cardibach · 14/12/2023 18:48

I realised how vulnerable I was, in the house alone with the door unlocked, with delivery drivers feeling that they could do this. In that respect I agree that just because a door maybe unlocked, doesn't give a delivery driver the right to try the handle
@Projectme its not the delivery man doing this which makes you vulnerable though. He had no bad intent as can be seen from his actions. You were (perhaps) vulnerable because your door was open. Nobody seems able to separate these things.

cardibach · 14/12/2023 18:51

Megifer · 14/12/2023 13:42

Of course theres a safety issue if someone deems it a threat to their safety. Which many people would, including those who are mentally vulnerable, but who gives a shit about those.

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No, it’s not. It may be a threat to their peace of mind, but if they lock the door it won’t be.
Why do you think people don’t care about the vulnerable because we don’t think it’s dangerous for a delivery man to open a door, put down a parcel and shut the door again!

cardibach · 14/12/2023 18:53

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 14:09

@IsThisOneAvailable and then you'd be in the shit for your dog biting someone.

Helloooo safety issue!

But of course because I have an imaginary dog, my point wasn't valid.

It’s also an imaginary open door. No dog. Door locked so didn’t open. If you have a dangerous dog, keep it safe.

cardibach · 14/12/2023 19:12

Flickersy · 14/12/2023 16:02

People have been silent on this so far.

If it's perfectly OK behaviour, it means that even if OP reports him nothing will happen.

If he'd get fired for it, then obviously it's not OK.

Which is it? Or should OP just put up with unacceptable behaviour because "be kind".

Show quote history

The point is, the OP wants to complain becupause she thinks it’s bad. Therefore she thinks (presumably) that there will be consequences. She’s happy whatever they are.
The actual situation is irrelevant (though I wouldn’t complain and I don’t think there would be consequences as I think it’s ok - see how that works?).

SantaBarbaraMonica · 14/12/2023 19:24

secretsanta23 · 14/12/2023 17:22

@SantaBarbaraMonica I don't care what it's for. Don't fry to open my door.

It is fair enough to be livid someone opened the door to your home. But I wouldnt report for the reason people are saying. It was a very bad judgement call on delivery persons part, but I suspect if they were hammering on the door and making such bad judgements, they were not either sound of mind or having an okay day.

FrancisSeaton · 14/12/2023 19:41

I'd rather this than the postie who left my sons 200 pound tracksuit lay on the path yesterday ffs

Zippitydoodaa · 14/12/2023 20:01

Imagine if you had received an email to say " parcel has been delivered" .You hop out if bed , open the door and parcel has been stolen , by an opportunist who watches these delivery people ,only doing there job !
Now , that would have passed you off !!

Projectme · 15/12/2023 09:55

cardibach · 14/12/2023 18:48

I realised how vulnerable I was, in the house alone with the door unlocked, with delivery drivers feeling that they could do this. In that respect I agree that just because a door maybe unlocked, doesn't give a delivery driver the right to try the handle
@Projectme its not the delivery man doing this which makes you vulnerable though. He had no bad intent as can be seen from his actions. You were (perhaps) vulnerable because your door was open. Nobody seems able to separate these things.

My door wasn't 'open'. It was unlocked. If the front door was wide open then absolutely, he could chuck the parcel in/step in the house to lay the parcel on the floor, take his picture and leave but the door wasn't wide open.

Because of the delivery drivers actions, I now feel vulnerable at home if the front door isn't locked. I didn't before that happened, so yes it is as a result of his actions. Please don't tell me how I should feel or how I should separate 'things'. You aren't me.

cardibach · 15/12/2023 23:56

I know I’m not you @Projectme
But I’m nit sure why a non-threatening event has made you feel vulnerable. Still, it’s easily solved. Lock the door or get a door with a Yale lock.

KievLoverTwo · 16/12/2023 02:28

I have had this happen to me twice. Both times it was Amazon, both times the drivers weren't English. One was a man, one was a woman. I caught the woman who had left the parcel outside the flat door (in a hallway) and shouted after her 'don't ever try come inside my home again.' She looked completely taken aback and startled. She did apologise.

I assume it's just a culture thing. I guess in some other cultures, you open the door and leave post inside.

I don't think I reported her (can't remember what happened with him) because I figured they just need one old bat like me shouting at them to realise it's not appropriate.

If the same driver did it to me twice, I would definitely report it.

It's quite terrifying when it happens, but I genuinely don't think any malice was involved. Different countries do things differently, shrug.