As a 41 yo woman, would you date a 62 yo man ?

[Thekormachameleon]

He's good looking, financially comfortable, works full time, funny, fit and healthy

But it just seems such a huge age gap

Absolutely not - sorry. I’m 40 and my dad is 62. I’m just can’t imagine being intimate with someone the same age as my parents, regardless of how fit and healthy that are presently.

I know a few couples with an age gap of 10 years. That is pretty normal I think.

But this is 21 years. That is a big gap.

It's hard to say without meeting him. He sounds like he's young at heart.

My SIL's partner is 22 years older than her. She looks 10 to 15 years older than her years as she dresses, acts and has interests and ideas heavily influenced by him. He has aged her in that respect.

@FourteenTog That's hardly comparable to 21 years, though. They were definitely the same generation.

No. I did date someone much o,derbthan me when I was in my 20s. But he was in his 40s then. He must be almost 70 now and I can not imagine it (apart from the fact that he was a piece of shit). My FIL is mid- 70s and so much older DH and I (who are 44). I think that gap of 20 years seems bigger once they reach 60s.

Contradicting myself a bit, but I'd find late teens and late 20s nowadays a lot more different than similar. It suited them as they were from the same rural area and hadn't been to university, and eventually worked together. Nowadays late teens can be like a big child while late 20s may already have had responsible jobs. I feel things equalise in modern times when the younger partner is 30 minimum to begin with. I mean, a well travelled 30 year old with lot of job experience dating a divorcee of 50 who's been in one or two jobs or not been adventurous seems close enough.

No I probably wouldn't. I'm very happily married, but in the hypothetical, the older I get, the lower the acceptable age gap becomes. My own age (early 40s) when I was 25 seemed like a large gap, but not unreasonable.

Now I am that age and I see what the same age gap looks like from this perspective, I'm so glad DH and I are of an age. And I say that as someone who is extremely fit and sincerely wants to stay that way.

Oh come on. Anything could happen to anyone but that does not in any way change that 60 is not 40, and we have extensive detailed statistics on the various health and employment ways that they are different. It is not ageist to acknowledge the difference of a generation between these two people.

Statistics? So you've controlled for educational level, if one of them has migrated from a war zone, etc. I really am unwatching now. This thread is about neither romance nor commitment, not about soul or mind, not even about planning a family, but about the 21st century zipless fuck. Leave the silver foxes and cougar chinchillas to me. Date statistically, and ignore the numerous times we need care throughout life, and the variety of reasons people find each other interesting.

I'm 37...so would be the same age gap as me dating a 58 year old.

No, absolutely not. 58 year olds are not on my dating radar.

Sometimes who we're attracted to doesn't follow a 'radar' or convention. It can take you by surprise completely. Two adults who enjoy each other's company is a great thing.

@marshmallowfinder in my nearly 20 years of being an adult I've never been attracted to any man significantly older than me. Not once.

Of course you can never be 100% sure I suppose but I can't imagine that changing tbh. For many, age is an important factor in attractiveness.

OK, that's you. For many, age is not an important factor in attractiveness. That is how it is. Sweeping statements help no one.

I agree @SpringingJoy I'm the same, never once had it bad for a significantly older man, and it certainly wouldn't happen now im 53!!

@marshmallowfinder other people's experiences aren't sweeping statements.

I’m 50 and I wouldn’t date a 62 year old. And there was a nice man who liked me at that age. But no, he will age a lot over the next decade.

And you will notice his age when he is naked and in your sex like.

Quite right, they're not. I was meaning sweeping statements in general, going by many comments on this thread.

No. Sorry. 20+ is too much of an age gap. You are at completely different stages in your life.

Exactly. I mean he'd be bloody retired soon and youd still have yonks to go in work. That'd piss both of you off eventually.

I’m 60. And I wouldn’t date an 80 year old . I think that many people age more quickly once they reach their late seventies/ early eighties and health problems become more apparent. And that’s what you would be facing if you stayed with him. Just as you are retiring and having the freedom to do what you want he would potentially be slowing down and becoming more dependent ( I know this is not universal) . The gap between you would definitely increase

No, I'd be friends though. My oldest friend is 40 years my senior and we get along brilliantly.

Without going back and reading every post on this long thread, from what I recall the op wasn't talking about setting up house with this man, just dating. I think that is OK as long as they get on well and mutually enjoy some activities (& the other thing of course). Plenty of men of his age are fit and well. I only foresee a problem if they are hoping for something more serious, a long-term commitment, but for what it is, or appears to be, it seems fine. They could be friends and supportive of each other for many years and that would be rewarding.

Yes exactly that
I don't want a serious relationship and he knows that
But we do get on well, we have shared interests, he's fun and strangely very sexy - I was initially very against the idea because of his age but how can enjoying spending time with someone without any expectations be a bad thing

My cards were on the table and he's under no illusions that I'm looking for a long term partner or husband so where's the harm in enjoying some nice days and nights out

I'm 41. Absolutely not.