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Original poster

Sad that childhood seems to be so short these days

156 replies

rdlong · 05/12/2023 16:08

I just had a baby earlier this year and so I don't have this problem yet but speaking to friends and family with older children it seems like childhood now ends at about 7 years old!

Everyone is buying gifts at the moment and after 7 or even 6 years old in some cases onwards toys seem to be a thing of the past, the kids are no longer interested and they want things like ipads, iphones, gaming consoles, fancy trainers, expensive clothes, perfume, aftershave, skincare, make up, hair styling gadets, led lights for their bedroom, fancy bluetooth headphones and the like. I even heard of one 10 year old boy who is getting a record player as he wants to "get into collecting vinyl"! I was going to get my niece who is 9 a couple of books as part of her Christmas as she used to like reading but she has explicitly asked not to get books as she doesn't like how they clutter her minimalist bedroom, ditto for art supplies and craft sets, she wants people to buy her skincare, make up and jewellery from her wish list instead, she is 9!

At 9 I was starting to enjoy music and did get a small CD player but I also still was getting a few toys, as well as lots of books and lots of art materials and crafty things, puzzles and games, I was still a child at that age and I was well into my teens before I started getting anything like perfume or make up as gifts.

I just think its sad that childhood seems to be so short these days, like they go from being infants then have a year or two of childhood before they are tweenagers at 7 or 8. I know my niece watches loads of tiktok and I think she aspires to be like the older girls and young women she sees online she and her friends spend hours filming tiktoks which they don't post publicly but she is just dying to be a tiktoker.

I find it really insidious the influence devices can have, I know not every child gets to use them but so many do and even if they don't they are still exposed to the influence of social media through their peers that do have access and it means that kids who do still want toys, books or art stuff end up being laughed at if they don't have the latest teenage must have.

My friend has spent an absolute fortune on toys for her 5 year old son because its the last year he'll really appreciate them.

It makes me so sad for my own little one who I'd like to have a childhood that lasts till at least 11 or 12 and doesn't feel the need to be a teenager until they are actually a teen!

OP posts:
BabyYoshke · 05/12/2023 16:09

It depends where you live.

Carsarelife · 05/12/2023 16:10

I feel the same as you. I was born in 70's and was still playing with dolls at 9/10 years of age.
My DD is 8 and her list consists of - Air Jordan Trainers, Dry Robe coat, Crocs, Drunken Elephant Moisturiser etc
I blame Tik Tok
Gutted really as she's growing up way before her time

fedupandstuck · 05/12/2023 16:12

What you describe is not universal. The 7 and 8 year olds that I know don't watch TikTok or social media. They don't want clothes or perfume for Christmas.

The children you describe are clearly being guided/influenced by their environment and what their parents think is appropriate.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

10 year olds 5 year olds 6 year olds 9 year olds
ChildDevelopmentSettings · 05/12/2023 16:14

Disagree. But mainly because my son is 15 and still asks for Transformers. 😁

shockeditellyou · 05/12/2023 16:15

Carsarelife · 05/12/2023 16:10

I feel the same as you. I was born in 70's and was still playing with dolls at 9/10 years of age.
My DD is 8 and her list consists of - Air Jordan Trainers, Dry Robe coat, Crocs, Drunken Elephant Moisturiser etc
I blame Tik Tok
Gutted really as she's growing up way before her time

Well - who gave her TikTok??

Original poster
rdlong · 05/12/2023 16:16

@Carsarelife This is exactly it! I am getting crocs, drunk elephant skincare and bluetooth over ear headphones for my christmas but I am 32 years old but a 10 year could well be asking for the exact same as me! Its crazy really!

OP posts:
Thecomfortador · 05/12/2023 16:16

I don't think it means their childhood is over? They're still viewing the world through a child's eyes. My ds asked for a record player as well for his birthday (nearly 8). He's also asked for a printer or VHS player (he won't be getting them haha). I think they're just vintage items which seem appealing for some reason. He has also asked for squishmallow and a transformer. I think you're seeing this through adult eyes and applying to your own childhood era when in reality it can't be the same, as these things are really just fashions which have changed since choice and variety was a thing. My nana would have said the same if I'd got a cd player as a child, isn't she sophisticated, we got a doll and a satsuma in my day... Etc.

Carsarelife · 05/12/2023 16:16

@shockeditellyou
Her older sister unfortunately

Scruffington · 05/12/2023 16:17

My 11 year old nephew has asked me for a lego set for Christmas.

I think keeping kids away from Tiktok is a good idea. It's too addictive.

Blessedbethefruitz · 05/12/2023 16:18

My ds will be almost 6 next Christmas. He's very young for his age maybe, especially compared to your circle, I can't imagine him not wanting toys, books and crafts!

Lights for their room though I don't think is non toy like. Mine is getting a mario mushroom nightlight this year! He has lots of access to tech, but age appropriate stuff. Puzzles, games, videos of other people playing games 😅 No way will he be watching tik tok and that at 7. Maybe it helps that we don't do that kind of social media?

Original poster
rdlong · 05/12/2023 16:19

Scruffington · 05/12/2023 16:17

My 11 year old nephew has asked me for a lego set for Christmas.

I think keeping kids away from Tiktok is a good idea. It's too addictive.

I totally agree but even if you do they still get access to it via their friends or are subject to peer pressure to follow the trends on tiktok. Kids that age mostly want to be like their friends and have what they have and complain of being laughed at or bullied if they don't get the in thing.

OP posts:
BMIwoes · 05/12/2023 16:20

Totally not the case for my 10 yr old. He wants robots, lego, a prank baby doll (that moves so he can creep people out) and loads of chocolate. Don't give your kids phones with social media access till they're a bit older. That really is what it comes down to.

Original poster
rdlong · 05/12/2023 16:21

@Blessedbethefruitz I don't really do social media either but I worry that mine will end up exposed to all that stuff through their peers even if I don't allow it.

OP posts:
curaçao · 05/12/2023 16:21

I was born in 68 and had grown out o toys by 7.It is normal

Carsarelife · 05/12/2023 16:22

@BMIwoes it's not phones it's more IPads, Laptops

lavenderlou · 05/12/2023 16:22

Depends on the child. My 13 year old still plays with Barbies. She is very young for her age. I played with dolls until I was at least 14 so she probably takes after me.

BMIwoes · 05/12/2023 16:24

Unfortunately you just have to be firm and say no even if they say they hate you for it. We've given our 10 year old a phone, but restrict the apps he can download and have blocked Internet search. If his friends don't have the same restrictions its tough. To be fair, I think its worse for girls, boys seem to stay childish for a bit longer from what I can see.

BMIwoes · 05/12/2023 16:24

Same principle surely. Don't let them use a laptop or ipad unsupervised, for under 10s.surely that's a given?

Original poster
rdlong · 05/12/2023 16:25

curaçao · 05/12/2023 16:21

I was born in 68 and had grown out o toys by 7.It is normal

I think most people who grew up in the 90's or earlier would disagree with that. I think by 8 or 9 I was more into art and spent hours drawing and making comics with my best friend and doing calligraphy stuff but I still had toys I played with and my sister is a couple of years younger I still did imaginative play with her when I was 11 and 12.

OP posts:
PuttingDownRoots · 05/12/2023 16:25

I work with 8-10yos. Some still believe in Santa. All want some sort of toy for Christmas (but that includes computer games and consoles). Maybe a bit of eye shadow or lip gloss, but no "skin care" or such nonsense.

avocardigan · 05/12/2023 16:25

DS is just 13 and still sleeps with his toy owl.
He wants fancy American soda and candy, some gaming merchandise - a t shirt and fluffy blanket. He really struggled to think what he wanted. He doesn’t have a phone, just an iPad and school laptop so he watches YouTube a lot but it’s just gamer fails and reaction videos.

stepintochristmas1 · 05/12/2023 16:25

I really don't agree childhood is short nowadays . If you hark back to old days children were out at work much much earlier . Maybe they have different tastes now of what they want .

Original poster
rdlong · 05/12/2023 16:27

stepintochristmas1 · 05/12/2023 16:25

I really don't agree childhood is short nowadays . If you hark back to old days children were out at work much much earlier . Maybe they have different tastes now of what they want .

I knew someone would mention this and yes the childhoods we had were at least for poorer people a more modern thing but I want my child to have that kind of childhood, the kind that I had but it does seem so rare these days.

OP posts:
stepintochristmas1 · 05/12/2023 16:31

Things will always move forward we can't keep repeating .

MissDollyMix · 05/12/2023 16:32

It's a strange one isn't it? I have a 13 year old who is very 'young' and still plays with soft toys. When he goes out with his friends they climb trees together and play 'battles'. My DH was sitting in a car park with a bottle of cider with his friends at that age! My 10 year old is much more 'grown up' but her no.1 ask for Christmas is a hobby horse. I do think social media has a role to play in setting children's expectations but whatever their interests (or what they think their interests should be!) they are still young and in some ways they are much more sheltered than my generation (born in the 80's)