Sad that childhood seems to be so short these days

[rdlong]

I just had a baby earlier this year and so I don't have this problem yet but speaking to friends and family with older children it seems like childhood now ends at about 7 years old!

Everyone is buying gifts at the moment and after 7 or even 6 years old in some cases onwards toys seem to be a thing of the past, the kids are no longer interested and they want things like ipads, iphones, gaming consoles, fancy trainers, expensive clothes, perfume, aftershave, skincare, make up, hair styling gadets, led lights for their bedroom, fancy bluetooth headphones and the like. I even heard of one 10 year old boy who is getting a record player as he wants to "get into collecting vinyl"! I was going to get my niece who is 9 a couple of books as part of her Christmas as she used to like reading but she has explicitly asked not to get books as she doesn't like how they clutter her minimalist bedroom, ditto for art supplies and craft sets, she wants people to buy her skincare, make up and jewellery from her wish list instead, she is 9!

At 9 I was starting to enjoy music and did get a small CD player but I also still was getting a few toys, as well as lots of books and lots of art materials and crafty things, puzzles and games, I was still a child at that age and I was well into my teens before I started getting anything like perfume or make up as gifts.

I just think its sad that childhood seems to be so short these days, like they go from being infants then have a year or two of childhood before they are tweenagers at 7 or 8. I know my niece watches loads of tiktok and I think she aspires to be like the older girls and young women she sees online she and her friends spend hours filming tiktoks which they don't post publicly but she is just dying to be a tiktoker.

I find it really insidious the influence devices can have, I know not every child gets to use them but so many do and even if they don't they are still exposed to the influence of social media through their peers that do have access and it means that kids who do still want toys, books or art stuff end up being laughed at if they don't have the latest teenage must have.

My friend has spent an absolute fortune on toys for her 5 year old son because its the last year he'll really appreciate them.

It makes me so sad for my own little one who I'd like to have a childhood that lasts till at least 11 or 12 and doesn't feel the need to be a teenager until they are actually a teen!

Children start work later than ever, and stay in school for longer. I think childhood had gotten longer not shorter

This is on parenting. You can tell by what their kids get and ask for.

I think all kids are just different. I definitely had stopped playing with dolls and anything you might consider a “toy” (rather than a craft set or something) by the time I was 7 (mid 90s).

“Their” was correct

@GooseClues no it isn't. Get her off their
Isn't it there?

I agree. I don't think toys are an indicator of childhood. Taking personal responsibility is avmore important sign of growing up.

I live in London and none of my three children - oldest 11 - have a phone or TikTok or social media. They don’t even have an iPad. This year they are getting a switch for Christmas but usually play with sylvanian families and playmobil (even the eldest). The really love Lego and arts and crafts. This has graduated to a sewing machine for the eldest. It’s your choice. You choose their influences and what comes into your home.

I think there is a very very long teenage period these days. Not a child but not an adult.

How depressing OP 🙁 Not my experience though...my primary age DC don't have phones (or any independent inernet access), still very much into toys/craft/books etc.

People also forget that this is ... Christmas. So the only time besides birthdays when kids might actually get the "big" thing. You also don't see the other ,possibly seasonal things they ask for /are bought that are still toys/childlike. Like jigsaws, bubbles, chalks, sand/water stuff etc. Did DD ask for a pair of Converse? Yes she did.. because the rest of the year she wears cheap unbranded stuff and she actually doesn't give a shit, but she likes the look of Converse and know they're not cheap so she put them on her list. She's going to be 12 soon for reference and she will get them for her birthday.

I would take someone's opinion ,who thinks that from infancy to 6/7 (ignoring how inaccurate that age is) as only 1-2 years, with a pinch of salt.

I don't know where you live OP but that's one of the most depressing posts I've read in a long time. Those kids sound like they have parents desperately trying to grow them up too fast.

My DC is nearly 9 and has asked for nothing but toys & dolls for Christmas.

@Carsarelife WTAF why on earthhhh are you allowing an 8yr old on TikTok? Jeeeeez that's terrifying.

My 8yr old is playing with dolls and toys. Moisturiser?!?

My DD (8)does like fashion and Taylor Swift but I wouldn’t be getting her premium skincare/make up or anything geared for teenagers/adults and thankfully she hasn’t asked for anything. She does have a few bits of makeup stuff from Claire’s but it’s all very ‘kid like’ and put on as part of dressing up.

DD has asked for a baby doll this year so her existing one has a friend so that’s what she’s getting. We’ve also bought her some Monster High dolls, a bit ‘cooler’ than Barbie but still a toy. We get her the harumika dress sets that we do together so she gets to explore fashion in a fun but age appropriate way (also really fun for adults btw).

So basically not universal and plenty of 7/8 year olds still into toys.

DS1 is 7.5 and has asked for star wars lego and pop up football goals for Christmas. He has spent most of the evening inside of a 'fort' with DS2 (3).

When I speak to DS1s friends (7 or 8) most of them still sound like kids rather than mini teenagers...they talk about things like star wars vs. Harry potter or who their favourite football player is. Hama beads seem really popular amongst the girls..

In some ways it’s longer. Teens are far more dependent on parents than we were at the same age.

The posts on here and in real life of people not leaving 15 year olds unattended etc - I was babysitting at 13. University open days exams etc parents today expected to be far more involved than any of our parents ever were.

My 8 and 6 year old don't have phones, don't have iPads. Have never watched tiktok or YouTube, don't play Roblox or anything like that. They do watch stuff on netflix and Amazon prime. Sometimes me and DH worry we are holding them back and they will be social pariahs because we haven't let them have access to the internet world, then I read threads like this and feel more validated.

They're both happy. 8 year old has asked for craft bits, books, harry potter dressing gown and a Hedwig the owl. 6 year old has a list of Lego sets as long as his arm (which he won't be getting all of!) And has also asked for a skateboard.

I'm a primary teacher and I find it really variable, what kids are into. Without a doubt though, you can pick out the ones who have access to social media. It seems to change their attitude almost immediately and then 8 year olds into 13 year olds overnight. You can just say no and preserve that innocence and lightness for a few more years. You won't be the only one doing it.

My 8 almost 9 year old has asked for a tonne of Barbie stuff and e-reader and arts and crafts things. Even my 12 year old has asked for paints. No tik tok in this house.

Just read the Christmas threads on here and you will see toys ,games and crafts galore up to 11, after that it's a mix of those and more grownup stuff. OP is talking out of her arse. I mean one of the things she objects to is LED lights ffs.

It's up to you as a parent to guide your children so they make good decisions. Don't just resign yourself to the fact they'll do what their peers do anyway.

My dd is 16. She has friends who are into tik tok. She isn't. She reads voraciously, loves cat accounts on insta, loves skincare and make up but that's only been since she was 14/15. We've always guided her towards age appropriate activities and interests, didn't allow early access to social media and helped her make good choices and now at 16, she's a smart girl who still makes good choices and thinks tik tok is pretty stupid.

My kids school asked every parent to sign a declaration that we will not allow our children have phones until after graduation. It's a fantastic incentive, I feel I am safe for another few years from tiktok. Crazy that an app can influence children's interests like this.

Not in our circles but we have a ban on ipads and phones and limit TV.

I had toys until I was about 11 and then still games, lego and craft things after that. I’ll be doing the same here with DD.

Absolutely no chance she’ll be getting skincare or proper make up or anything like that pre-teen. That’s just shitty parenting.

Also expect that those that gave up toys very early have the sort of disinterested parents that never play with them.

It's definitely the Tik Tok influence, I have seen it among all my friends children. All 10/11 years old asking for Drunk Elephant, Stanley waterbottles, UGGs etc

I'm not sure if it's down to me not allowing Tik Tok but my girls are not into brands (yet anyway). I know my teen could watch tik tok if she really wanted to so I guess her friends are not that into it either.

I would say I am moderately strict, no smart phone until 13, family link to block sites, but both kids have Chromebooks, internet, you tube etc.

I'm thinking one Christmas of fairly boring (but overly expensive) gifts might renew the interest in crafts, toys, books among the tween set.

Why is it shitty parenting to let your hormonal ,going through puberty 10/11/12 yo have something like Cetaphil soap/cream or acne cream or moisturiser or moisturiser with spf or maybe even a dab of concealer on a triple under the skin spot?