Mumsnet bullies

[Netflixandsnacks]

To think that after reading replies on mumsnet, it's obvious that school bullies never change as they get older.
The downright nastiness for no reason, from grown adults. It's horrible to read, especially when it's a thread where the op is already feeling awful or is in a bad situation. These people must really have something awful in their lives to feel the need bring someone else down to make themselves feel better. It's sad really. I feel sorry for people that are that miserable in their own lives.

Agreed OP I've seen a few mean girl type comments. I just ignore them and then they don't win.

I agree OP @Wishimaywishimight I too participated in that thread - and honestly some of the worst and nastiest bullying I’ve seen on mumsnet. It was so bad the OP didn’t return to the thread - it’s still ongoing today. one poster took time to draw a diagram with calculations as to how the OP couldn’t be right and must be at fault. The poor woman just wrote wanting some comfort. Instead she got abuse.

I think if it continues mumsnet will die away. It’s not a safe place anymore for a lot of people. Instead there is an ever growing group exercising their hatefulness on it .

I've noticed the same trait with one starting the goading followed by a pile on. I unwatch the thread at that point.

Definitely this. I have turned off all my notification thingies as I don't want to see the mean things people write as replies to my comments

Remember the thread about people taking extra long breaks at work and leaving early?

It seems a user will pop on a harsh response to something and it's like a green light for the mean girls to pile on.
I always wonder if those who dish out nasty responses are like that in real life 🤔

I agree OP - it's not even during a disagreement half the time - posters just launch in with a nasty comment that just leaves me speechless sometimes. Cannot understand it. Total lack of empathy and a needlessly rude and unconstructive response. Some people just seem to be here only to call people names. Baffling.

But yes maybe we should have an emoji like the biscuit one we used (not seen it recently) to have?

I call out any unjustified unpleasantness on the thread when I see it. Very occasionally report to HQ.

Otoh I think there is a great deal of touchiness and over-sensitivity on display on Mumsnet at the same time. That can get tiresome too.

I always wonder if those who dish out nasty responses are like that in real life 🤔

I always suspect they wouldn't say boo to a goose in real life.

The nasty posters aren't necessarily miserable - just nasty and, like a lot of bullies, sheep (happy to join an existing pile on but maybe wouldn't make a one-off nasty comment without assured backup).

Call out the bullies when you see it - especially when they're totally drowning out all the reasonable responses.

I've also noticed a class of responders on here that I'd label as sub-bullies. They'd argue that their responses are 'reasonable' - but their responses are still hurtful, thoughtless and unsupportive.

Some people just get kicks out of being nasty online. I always hope no one will give them the satisfaction of biting, but someone (or several people) invariably does

A single death is a tragedy, a hundred deaths is a statistic explains this phenomenon - I cannot remember who said this

Last comment was for raincloudsonasunnyday on page one

Why is name changing so vital? Are we supposed to change our names every so often?

I find some of the bad ones are when someone posts with a concern that doesn't involve their imminent destruction, and you get these tiresome comments like "If this is all you have to worry about then you need to get out more". As if people are incapable of having several problems at once.....

Yes and there is always someone who will defend the nasty comments. I don’t know how some posters sleep of a night to be honest. You never know just how much certain comments stay in peoples brains after they have been said. Personally I think if you can’t say anything nice then don’t say anything at all.

Yeah there are loads of heartless, nasty cunts on here. And ones who can only see life from their experience.
But most are ok. Some are absolutely lovely. Like in life, focus on the gooduns.

I received a wrist-slap email from MN a few weeks ago. To me it was very obvious I had failed to comply with the obligatory groupthink on the topic under discussion ie I shared my view that one person's 'right' to something very frequently causes detriment/harm to many others. Within 24 hours there was a different thread where a couple of other posters were saying precisely what I'd said and their comments were allowed to remain. I guess it just depends on whether your face fits and/or whether the groupthink monitors happen across a comment, sneakily reporting it without offering a counter argument or, as pp said above, call on their coven for support. I was very amused as the event reinforced for me the stereotype of the 'desirable' MN poster.

I don't think they are mean girls just lonely or sad.

They tend to happen at certain times eg Sat evening seems popular. If you have nothing better to do on a Sat night then write a rude or pointless response to a thread you aren't winning in life!

It’s very interesting to note that some people on this thread are people I have seen being unpleasant to others on other threads. (And no, I won’t name them).

It’s the posters who try to catch you out. I wrote a post about a meal on return from a holiday recently.

Cue pointless questions about how fresh the food was and where the food had come from. It’s to try and make you look like a liar!

See now that’s a bitchy comment about those who don’t want to or can’t go out on a Saturday night.

@SnickersWasAHorse
Please do! Name them.

Is it? I thought it was a comment on choosing to spend your evening being mean to strangers when you could be having a nice bubble bath/doing crochet/colouring in/getting laid/going clubbing/phoning your mum.... Well anything else really!

It's not vital to me as I rarely do it but then again I've never posted anything personal on the internet.

However as you can see when you read MN, plenty of people do and they don't want anyone in RL spotting them and digging through their posting history.