Little rituals you do for yourself that have big rewards

[Cazzovuoi]

i have Complex-PTSD after a horrific childhood thanks to my narc mother. It’s taken me a long time to learn how to take care of myself. I’m not looking for sympathy, just giving some context.

Part of my recovery has been to create self care habits for myself that include washing my teeth every night and putting on lip balm etc.

I’d love to know what little rituals you do for yourself. Like moisturising your whole body after a shower or putting on face cream and settling in bed with a book.

I’m looking for inspiration, for little things because Google gives insipid shite like get a manicure or light a scented candle (I loathe scented candles). I need inspiration from real women!

Thanks for the lovely thread. Very uplifting!

I don't manage it every morning but I like to get up a little earlier than I need to and do 5-10 minutes of yoga. I found a morning yoga routine on youtube and did it until I memorised it. It's a bit of a shock to the system first thing but I feel absolutely zinging afterwards! Then a coffee in the garden (or overlooking it if the weather's awful), listening to the birds and daydreaming, until it's time to get on with things.

I always do squats when I clean my teeth. 20 if I'm tired, 40 if I feel perky. Teeth get really clean and I can feel the springiness in my body from having very activated glutes and thigh muscles.

Use some of those scrubby gloves and a good shower gel and give whole body an exfoliation, going in the direction of the heart for circulation., followed by a nice body lotion. Bliss.

Gin and tonic while having bubble bath. Very decadent.

Love this one.

@Saggypants - pls share your yoga video - what a great idea.

My treat is cleanse and moisturise face, brush teeth and then spray lavender “sleep spray” on my pillow. Mmmmmm.

I have muesli, Greek yoghurt and fresh berries for breakfast every morning with a large black coffee in my favourite mug. I start early so the house is quiet and peaceful. It feels incredibly decadent (berries aren’t cheap) and I fool myself it’s probably healthy. It’s probably the only meal of the day where I choose exactly what I want and enjoy ten minutes of uninterrupted peace and quiet. Bliss.

Ooh I'm going to try this - mind sharing the brand?

Not at all!
https://www.essie.co.uk/nail-care/apricot-cuticle-oil

And I've just discovered they make a rollerball version which I might buy to keep in my handbag...

Morning cuddles with my cat

Letting myself feel very decadent on occasion by buying, then slowly eating an entire packet of king prawns.

Or half a tub of mackerel pate on a warm baguette.

Or a crisp sandwich. White sliced bread. Salt and vinegar crisps. Sheer bliss.

Snuggling on the sofa under my furry blanket and watching an entire series of Gavin and Stacey.

Making a nice coffee in the mornings (sometimes it's the only thing that gets me out of bed), I grind the fancy beans myself, use my aeropress and even have a little milk frother, it's my little bit of luxury and it tastes great. Sometimes I sit in the garden and listen to the birds while I drink it, very zen.

Once a week I do a big clean up, wash clothes, change my sheets, hoover etc. and feel so much better when my living space is clean, tidy and organised.

In the evenings after my shower I do my skincare routine, just a few minutes but makes me feel a bit pampered. Also sometimes I listen to a guided meditation before bed which helps me relax.

F

On Sunday evenings I have a week planning routine where I put everything boring in even down to what laundry I an doing when and also something I am planning to enjoy each day like a cup of tea in a cafe, a walk in the city etc. I find it so calming to have it all written out, even when things dont always go to plan in reality!
Also listen to a sleep story from the calm app in bed each night.

Using L'occitane almond shower oil makes me feel like I've got my shit together. I can be having the worst day for panic attacks etc but using that at the end of the day helps to reset and calm me a little. I only buy it when it's on sale so it's some much needed luxury for the price of a takeaway.

Mornings, I quickly tidy up while the coffee machine makes my coffee, set the robot hoover off and sit with my feet up while it does all the work. Just having that time to calm after the kids leave for school is lovely.

I also have an Oodie now too. That thing is so warm and comfortable! So those 3 things make my days abit better. Hope you're ok OP ❤️

Bubble bath (long and hot)
Quick shower with L'Occitane Lemon Verbena
Perfume
Tea in bed

Pamper night once night a week. I have a bath (I do love a scented candle ill admit so I light one of those) and ill exfoliate with a great smelling scrub, mousturise, shave, do a hair mask, whiten my teeth and in summer I do tan, also paint my nails or at least file them and remove old polish. Often it feels like a lot of effort but I know i wake up feeling so much better the next day for it.

Clean sheets and clean jammies feel great.

Going to bed early and reading for a while instead of being on my phone before bed means I sleep a bit better.

Every night before I go to bed I will brush my teeth, do my skincare routine and take my multivitamins. If I do nothing else for myself in the day, that alone feels like I've looked after myself and it doesn't take long.

Doing housework is another big one for me, I feel overwhelmed easier when my house isn't reasonably tidy. So again it's one where it feels like effort but I feel so much better for it. I stick Bluetooth headphones in and listen to music I like to dance to which makes it more fun.

I feel like I only learned recently about the difference between physical and mental 'rest' and how it replenishes resilience. So before if I felt drained I'd have gone to sleep and prioritised napping but then I never really felt any better. I wasn't tired but I was still easily drained. Whereas now I try to do things that are actually going to refill my cup so to speak. Like prioritise seeing people who make me feel good, reading my book, doing a 30min yoga video, cleaning the house and being outside for a walk, having a good dinner and a glass of nice wine if i fancy it. All the things that make life feel rich and good to balance out the heavy.

I am going to do this this Sunday!

Once a week I try and get to a local coffee shop, get a really lovely coffee (or 2) and sit and read my book for an hour..... all alone, by myself, its bloody bliss and goes a long way to restoring my soul

On an autumn morning I like to take a stroll round the garden with the cat when it's all quiet, planning things to plant / move, then come in for mug of tea and toast or proper porridge with golden syrup. As per pp, also a beautiful set of bone china mugs, to make it special.

At elevenses, I make big mug of milky coffee, like to put on some beautiful classical music and just pause - recently got a record player and there's something special about putting a record on.

At night wrap myself up in warm blanket, have some cocoa and crumpets with maple syrup, and go outside and look up at the stars.

Cheerstome I do the same as you each morning. I also feed my cat and he comes up and les on my chest purring, as I enjoy the sky, trees and birds. Bliss

I keep a gratitude journal which I fill in before bed. It prompts me to look for all the good stuff each day; whether it’s a really good cup of coffee or an excellent gym session.

I definitely think it’s made my outlook brighter.

partial to a dollop of almond l’occitane shower gel, too

An early night

Foraging for blackberries

Listening to the "nothing much happens" podcast

After a bath or shower, at around 9/10pm I put on a towelling dressing gown instead of using a towel. I make it smell like laundry by washing it with extra smelly laundry crystals etc. Then lie on my bed til I air dry with a book or writing in my journal, with a mint tea. I imagine I’m chilling in a spa robe, and it feels like my me time. After I’m dry & finish the tea I get into PJs and brush teeth for bed.

I have a few. Every morning I make myself a proper coffee from the machine and watch a TV programme after I’ve been outside to see to my horses and fed my cats and dogs. I think the fresh air, mucking out or poo picking really feels like I’ve deserve that moment of 30 minutes sit down. I have chocolate sprinkles too on top. I drown the cappuccino in it. It feels luxurious. It’s probably the only moment I get where the house is quiet and outside feels organised with my horses.

Also, in the winter I have baths and love bath salts and a book. We only have hot water in the winter due to our old oil boiler and I enjoy these so much. I shower every day with horses and it’s always practical so the winter baths feel decadent.

Finally, and this is super sad I know, I have started buying myself proper hand knitted 100% wool socks for winter for after my bath…told you it was sad!

Loving reading other’s ideas too. I may add some more!

I used to have a lot of body lotion around after being given smellies at Christmas, I never remembered to use it. But now I've started putting it on my feet at night and they feel lovely.