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Original poster

On the whole, what age did your friends start getting divorced?

150 replies

Fishandchipsatthebeach · 05/10/2023 13:58

I was talking about relationships with an older friend (I’m early 40s, she’s 50s). I said that most of my married friends are seemingly happy (on the surface at least, who knows what goes on behind closed doors) and that I can’t currently envisage any of them splitting up.

She said “just you wait, the divorces will come around 45-50”. Which sounds a bit negative to me but maybe I am naive??

So, if you are aged 40+, have many of your friends / acquaintances divorced, and was there an age it all started happening at?

OP posts:
usernother · 05/10/2023 14:00

Only one and she wasn't married in her 40's, it happened when she got married and divorced in her 50's. All of my friends that are married have been married more than 35 years.

PinkRoses1245 · 05/10/2023 14:02

One in their early 30s, and a few long term couples also split at similar age. All met and been together since school…

LaLaLouella · 05/10/2023 14:03

I'm 48 - I've had 5 friends get divorced. Two just after their 30th birthday, 2 just after their 40th birthday and 1 just after her 50th. I think 'big' birthdays make people take stock of their lives and situations....

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Pandor · 05/10/2023 14:03

We’re at the late 40s to early 50s stage - no divorces yet and no one is obviously unhappy with their partners.

mindutopia · 05/10/2023 14:05

I would say that the bulk of my acquaintances (not close friends) got divorced late 20s/early 30s. These were early (to me) marriages in their early/mid 20s. I am early 40s now and many of my age cohort are on 2nd marriages and 2nd rounds of young kids. Friends who didn't get married on the younger end, like me, got married in early-late 30s. I can't actually think of anyone close to me in that group who is already divorcing, but I assume they will be more likely to divorce, if they do, around the time that kids are later teens and leaving the nest, perimenopause, mid-life crisis time, which would be late 40s/early 50s.

felisha54 · 05/10/2023 14:06

Dc is late 40's and I'm early 40's. None of our friends or siblings/ cousins are divorced.

TheDuchessOfMN · 05/10/2023 14:06

We had a few friends get married at 30ish and divorce about 5 years later. That was a few years ago now.

I know of quite a few couples who are stuck together because of mortgages etc.

SirSidneyRuffDiamond · 05/10/2023 14:07

I'm middle 50s and no divorces amongst my friends yet. One friend's husband was divorced when they met - he had a foolish and very short-lived marriage in his late teens - but they have been married for about 25 years now. A few friends of friends have divorced and some work colleagues, but no-one close to me so far.

Lostcotter · 05/10/2023 14:09

Me and my friends are mainly late 30s. There’s been about 4 divorces in my 30s. But they’re all from people from my home town/city area that were kind of predictable they would break down eg. 2 were Marriages based on visas, a third involved a man who never committed to move to the UK where my friend (his wife) lived and refused to after marriage, and the 4th involving a guy (my mate) who very much into the club scene and getting with/ being around “beautiful ladies” I don’t know if that’s what’s led to his divorce but it could be.

most of my close friends are from uni though and I really can’t see any of my uni friends getting divorced in a decade or so when they’re 45-50!

They’re not only happily married, but they also have flourishing friendships, great social lives and successful careers and for the most part get along with their in-laws. I feel this all contributes to how well their relationships tick along. And no I don’t think this will be a case of “famous last words” 😂

JustAMinutePleass · 05/10/2023 14:14

My Indian friends and family were divorced at 18, 19, 25, 28, 47. Indian people in my circle tend to divorce earlier in life as it’s easier to get family support.

My non-Indian friends: 3 divorces between 40-44. One at 52.

LifeExperience · 05/10/2023 14:16

I'm in my sixties, and none of my friends have divorced, except me, many, many years ago. I've been happily remarried for over 30 years.

AngelsWithSilverWings · 05/10/2023 14:19

Best friend was divorced at age 32 after two years of marriage. Another two or three were early 40's after just over ten years of marriage. Most recent was at age 49 - came completely out of the blue for my friend just before 25th wedding anniversary when her DH announced he was leaving her for another women he'd met 6 months before.

3WildOnes · 05/10/2023 14:21

We are all mid 30s and friends mostly married late 20s to early 30s. No divorces yet.

boatyardblues · 05/10/2023 14:21

Our eldest just started uni. We went out with his best friend’s family for dinner before they left for uni. I was chatting with DS and his friend. They said quite a few of their friends’ parents planned to split once their youngest headed off to uni. The kids all knew it was on the cards. That might explain an uptick for couples with older teens/young adult children - the ‘staying together for the kids’ cohort.

mintich · 05/10/2023 14:22

I'm 43 and have 5 friends that are divorced. 1 in early 40s but the other 4 were early 30s

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 05/10/2023 14:23

Divorces I know 2 couples in early thirties

yogasaurus · 05/10/2023 14:24

Very late 30’s and two friends going through it.

Neither couple was very right together in the first place though, IMO

arethereanyleftatall · 05/10/2023 14:24

My experience is that it's more about the youngest kids age. So, once they're in secondary and it's so much easier childcare wise! Then everyone takes their chance to break free!

Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 05/10/2023 14:24

Also I remember my mum telling me it's 10yr mark folk get divorced not the "7 yr itch" we all hear about.

LovelyMMOG · 05/10/2023 14:25

I’m late 40s and two of my friends have divorced- one late 30s and one mid 40s.

minipie · 05/10/2023 14:26

I’m early 40s, friends mostly mid 40s. Just the one divorce, recently. Kids all still primary though so maybe it’s all to come 😬

theduchessofspork · 05/10/2023 14:26

I don’t think there’s one big rush of it, but certainly there will likely be a a few from late 40s to early 70s

I think having teen kids (ie coming up for air after years of parenting demanding little kids), kids leaving home, mid life reassessments (from the benign to the affair driven), mid life career and lifestyle changes, late mid life/early old age downsizing and retirement are all triggers

AutumnAuntie · 05/10/2023 14:29

A few in their early/mid 40’s.
Lots of my friend’s DH’s had affairs mid to late 40’s but they’re still married.

piscofrisco · 05/10/2023 14:30

I was 35. Two Friends were 38.

uhtredofbattenberg · 05/10/2023 14:33

Two couples got divorced after being married only a couple of years. They married in their early to mid 20s.

Another set when the kids were about 10-11 age.
So parents 40 something.

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