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Original poster

On the whole, what age did your friends start getting divorced?

150 replies

Fishandchipsatthebeach · 05/10/2023 13:58

I was talking about relationships with an older friend (I’m early 40s, she’s 50s). I said that most of my married friends are seemingly happy (on the surface at least, who knows what goes on behind closed doors) and that I can’t currently envisage any of them splitting up.

She said “just you wait, the divorces will come around 45-50”. Which sounds a bit negative to me but maybe I am naive??

So, if you are aged 40+, have many of your friends / acquaintances divorced, and was there an age it all started happening at?

OP posts:
hettiethehare · 05/10/2023 14:36

I'm 45 and none of my friends of a similar age/ lifestage have got divorced (yet).

Out of the divorced couples we do know, most were either late-20s pre kids, or early-30s with very small kids.

mondaytosunday · 05/10/2023 14:38

Only one friend has divorced. I think it can often coincide with the kids leaving home for uni/adult life. So that would be in the mid to late 50s usually.

Pancakefam · 05/10/2023 14:41

I think cosy of living struggles are making divorce harder and less likely.

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Jk987 · 05/10/2023 14:44

I'm mid 40's and quite a few of my friends, including me, didn't get married in the first place!

Titsywoo · 05/10/2023 14:45

I'm mid 40s - 3 divorced couples in my group of long term friends - all got married in early to mid 20s and divorced in early 30s. All are with new people or remarried now. I would say of my group of friends there is only one couple I don't think are happy but I think the wife won't leave for financial reasons plus the kids.

cocksstrideintheevening · 05/10/2023 14:45

I'm 44 and three of my friends have recently separated / divorced. They had kids first in the group so now the kids are older it seems to be starting. We are a group of ten couples, I can see more on the horizon including me.

Scoutabouttoo · 05/10/2023 14:46

I’m mid 50s and married in mid 30s. Most friends are still married. One divorce in 40s, one divorce in 40s and reconciliation in 50s. I can see though that when kids leave home some couples might realise they don’t have much in common with DP and want something different.

fishfingersandtoes · 05/10/2023 14:47

When youngest kids were about three seemed to be the time in my friendship group.

pacificoceanwhale · 05/10/2023 14:48

2 divorced friends. One was mid thirties and one late thirties

TiptoeThroughTheToadstools · 05/10/2023 14:50

Only me and one friend is divorced out of all my married friends. We both separated from our Hs at 34, I divorced at 37 and my friend divorced at 38.

WolfFoxHare · 05/10/2023 14:57

DH got divorced when he was 30, but hopefully won't do it again any time soon 😂

Pallisers · 05/10/2023 14:59

Most of my friends and family are still married.

Friends and acquaintances here in the US who have divorced did it when the last kid went to college. it is a cliche for a reason.

SallyWD · 05/10/2023 15:00

I can only think of one friend who got divorced actually and she was 30. I suppose all my friends chose wisely. They do seem to be married to lovely guys.
By the way, I'm 48 and have friends older and younger.

Minikievs · 05/10/2023 15:01

Mid 40s
Friendship group of 8. Six are divorced

ShadowsontheHill · 05/10/2023 15:02

Loads in mid forties and now just have a friend whose DH has left her for another woman, they are both 52. Another friend wants to divorce but is trying marriage counselling. I would say of people I know it’s about 30% divorcing.

unsync · 05/10/2023 15:02

One in their 30s and two late 40s / early 50s. The death / serious illness of a parent was a significant factor in all.

Summonedbybees · 05/10/2023 15:03

None of our close friends have divorced but a few have been widowed :(

flowellaben · 05/10/2023 15:08

We've had five couples out of our friendship group get divorced in the last two years. Two were in their mid to late forties, the other three early fifties.

UrsulaBelle · 05/10/2023 15:11

My exH left me when I was 46. I was the only person divorced among my big friendship group. Since then 2 others have divorced, one early 50s the other late 50s. Still around 20 couples happily married. Divorce stats show almost 50% of marriages end in divorce though.

SquigglePigs · 05/10/2023 15:12

I'm early 40's and only have one set of friends who divorced in their 20's, a couple of years after they got married. I also have a colleague who has been divorced twice, once in her 20's and once early 40's. Everyone else is still together.

Ilikeyourdecor · 05/10/2023 15:14

Well nearly 50% of marriages end in divorce I believe, so I expect it will happen.

I know nine divorced couples:
Two were mid 40s (husband had affair in one case, porn issues in the other);
Six were mid 30s

  • 1) wife had affair,
  • 2) same as (1),
  • 3) only married a few years - husband was a dick after they had a baby,
  • 4) wife was very ambitious and husband was a bit of a couch potato so had v little in common,
  • 5) same as (3);
  • 6) married too young and husband treated her horribly
One was mid 20s (married controlling older man straight out of uni and regretted it)

I'd expect a lot of divorces to happen older these days as most people I know now aren't getting married until their 30s in the first place.

Ilikeyourdecor · 05/10/2023 15:15

I also know a few couples who I would not be surprised to hear are divorcing once the kids are older.

Fairyfalls · 05/10/2023 15:16

Late forties and early fifties, most were waiting for the children to finish their GCSEs then were off. Apparently September is a busy time for divorce, parents waiting for exams to finish or get results.

ShadowsontheHill · 05/10/2023 15:18

@Fairyfalls yes was certainly an element with youngest child leaving for University in a lot of those break ups.

Followebyagiraffe · 05/10/2023 15:19

I think it depends when they married . I divorced at 29 but am 51 and still with second husband . My friends who married in their early 30s started to divorce mid 40s .

a friend told me that if you get to 13years married you are likely to stay together - no idea where she got that statistic from