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Should I tell our neighbour we can see her through the window?

259 replies

sendinganangel · 07/09/2023 09:01

So often when I go up to get my daughter sorted in her room, my neighbour is visible from what I assume is her room.

She has 2 young children of her own for context

My daughter is 4 and said this morning 'look mummy, the neighbour lady has her boobies out' Grin

Would you tell your neighbour you can see them? Do you think she knows this and just isn't putting curtails up

I and my husband have also seen her in the evenings, when we've put the bin out or something... she will be standing there at her sink washing up and appears completely naked... definitely topless

We live across from her so can see in

OP posts:
Olive19741205 · 07/09/2023 11:58

gogomoto · 07/09/2023 10:35

Can't see the problem myself, do you regularly stare out of your windows directly at your neighbour? I certainly don't, it's rude to deliberately look through someone's window.

I'm not overlooked admittedly but I walk around my house make sometimes, my house I can do what I want surely

" Do you regularly stare out your windows"? Fucking hell. That's literally the whole point of them, to see out, let light and air in. Who here is going to say, nah I never look out my windows ever.😂😂

HoneyPotts · 07/09/2023 11:59

If she is waking around naked she clearly knows what she is doing. Sending her a note will only encourage her. Just ignore and she will get bored soon enough.

my82my · 07/09/2023 12:00

@PinkNailpolish

She said she would laugh if someone put a note through her door.
She also never called herself a flasher.
She's in her own home, you've made it sound like she's hiding in a bush and jumping out at kids with her tits out.

Krickley · 07/09/2023 12:00

Imagine leaving the house at the same time and one of the kids pipes up- mum the lady who has her waps out is over there 👉 😜

what if it was a naked man and you could see his bat and balls? Why is it ok to see a woman vs a man?

LaGiaconda · 07/09/2023 12:00

I'd tell my child not to use the word 'boobies.'

DaaamnYoullDo · 07/09/2023 12:01

Are people really so prude that they'd put a note through someone's door because you can see that they're topless in their own home?

If you could see her masturbating then sure but it's a pair of tits. Would it be OK if it were a man, or if she had small boobs? I'm naked in my home alot and I couldn't give two shits if my neighbours are too.

runrabbit77 · 07/09/2023 12:02

Krickley · 07/09/2023 12:00

Imagine leaving the house at the same time and one of the kids pipes up- mum the lady who has her waps out is over there 👉 😜

what if it was a naked man and you could see his bat and balls? Why is it ok to see a woman vs a man?

Its called penis and testicles. Are you 4?

Ball and balls, good grief.

my82my · 07/09/2023 12:05

Krickley · 07/09/2023 12:00

Imagine leaving the house at the same time and one of the kids pipes up- mum the lady who has her waps out is over there 👉 😜

what if it was a naked man and you could see his bat and balls? Why is it ok to see a woman vs a man?

A man's cock and balls is completely different to a pair of tits.
Women sit on the beach with their boobs out, I've yet to see a pair of bollocks.

Janieforever · 07/09/2023 12:07

jotajil · 07/09/2023 11:54

The thing is there is no intent. She is in her own house probably cant be bothered to keep pulling the curtains or cover up in her own territorry. To me it doesnt matter. Being relaxed about it could help your daughter. After all breasts are not sexual objects, shameful or funny. I remember seeing my nans breasts - long and thin. I was intrigued as to the shape. A biology lesson.

These posts are creasing me up. Breasts are sexual. There is no way round it. No disputing it. Doesn’t mean they are solely sexual. But I suspect you know full well they are sexual.

Emptyandsad · 07/09/2023 12:09

VeridicalVagabond · 07/09/2023 09:09

If she's the kind of person who is very comfortable naked (ie doing the washing up tits akimbo) I doubt she's the kind of person who's going to give a toss anyone can see her.

I say this as someone who regularly wanders my house naked and doesn't much care if someone sees me. If someone put a note through my door I'd probably just laugh.

I'm just wondering what "tits akimbo" looks like...😳

Arms akimbo? I can picture that; but where are one's boobs when they're akimbo? One over each shoulder?

Littleme2023 · 07/09/2023 12:09

I’d post a note because I’m not sure I could survive the embarrassment at being on the receiving end of this conversation 🙈😂

Hi neighbour,

I wasn’t sure how best to approach this as it’s a bit awkward but if it was me I’d rather someone told me.

We can see you very clearly through the windows at the back/front of your house. Including when you have been topless. Our children have spotted you on more than one occasion and are asking a lot of questions and making comments which is a not ideal for us as they are young.

We’re honestly not being nosey neighbours but it’s hard not to notice.

We’d appreciate it if you could close the curtains blinds in future to protect your modesty.

Thanks for your consideration.

Number XX

my82my · 07/09/2023 12:09

@Janieforever
So a woman topless on a beach with kids around her, that's wrong to you??

DryIce · 07/09/2023 12:10

I couldn't get worked up about this OP. I mean how good a view could you really get from another house?

I often walk around my house naked. Very possibly the neighbours have had a glimpse, I'm sure it's nothing they haven't seen before

LivStanshall · 07/09/2023 12:12

One of my neighbours told me he could see right into my kitchen. I realised that I would often go in to make a coffee with very little on after a shower, for example. I took more care after this but I’m not bothered if on occasion someone can see me. I can see one of my male neighbours changing his clothes and he walks around without any for a bit but it’s not enough of a problem to say anything to him.

Littleme2023 · 07/09/2023 12:12

The point is she might not be aware and could be mortified - I would be. If she’s aware and doesn’t give a shit then that’s up to her and any comments she may receive or overhear would be of her own doing. For example, if the children notice her and say something as kids often do “that’s the lady who has her boobies out”

I would let her know. What she does with that information is then up to her.

stumpy12 · 07/09/2023 12:12

my82my · 07/09/2023 12:09

@Janieforever
So a woman topless on a beach with kids around her, that's wrong to you??

Why would you be topless on a beach where there's kids? Unless you're breastfeeding there's no need for them to be out.

Doggymummar · 07/09/2023 12:14

It's not illegal to be naked in your own home is it?

readbooksdrinktea · 07/09/2023 12:14

peekaboo1986 · 07/09/2023 10:01

How about close your own blinds/curtains and stop looking through peoples windows!

This.

Stop looking into her house and tell your child the same.

Krickley · 07/09/2023 12:14

my82my · 07/09/2023 12:05

A man's cock and balls is completely different to a pair of tits.
Women sit on the beach with their boobs out, I've yet to see a pair of bollocks.

But why are they??

my82my · 07/09/2023 12:15

@stumpy12
To get a better tan!

Tessisme · 07/09/2023 12:15

I wouldn't say anything. Some people are comfortable wandering around naked/topless. It's just a human body and, although I don't do it myself, I respect other people's right to do so, provided they are just going about their business as opposed to naked pole dancing or having sex.

Herewe · 07/09/2023 12:16

She might not be aware and would appreciate being made aware. I know I would.
If she doesn’t care then fine and when your kids get older she may decide she does care.

beeswaxinc · 07/09/2023 12:17

Oh god I hope it's not me, you don't live in an apartment block do you?!

FWIW I'm a busy mum and FWIW I genuinely think it's genetic, all my family like to go around barely clothed inside!!

I do wonder into the kitchen with the light off with nothing on occasionally as I just CBA to get fully dressed just to go there, but I'm convinced no one can see me due to the darkness and layout of the flats Blush

Netcam · 07/09/2023 12:17

Prestonparks · 07/09/2023 09:22

I dont think there is anything you can do without huge embarassment/ awkwardness really so I would let it go.

I would just laugh it off light heartedly - oh some people feel more comfortable without clothes/ she must be hot type thing!

Surely we should be teaching our children (and ourselves) to accept people for what they are and let them get on with it. There is nothing inherently wrong or shameful about seeing a naked body and we shouldnt be trying to shield children from bodies of all shapes and sizes. If its not hurting other people or causing offence it shouldnt be a problem.

(I say this having lived in Brighton for 20+ years where we have seen various interesting things like this - I tell my children to accept peoples right to be different - if we were all the same the world would be very dull)

Agree with this

beeswaxinc · 07/09/2023 12:18

Also I would be embarrassed but at the same time I do think I'd be a bit miffed if someone came to me and was like "oi, I can see you naked in your house".

Like, it's my house!