Funniest lines from a sitcom

[Kingsleadhat]

Could do with a laugh at the moment, so I'm wondering what are people's favourite funny lines from a sitcom or film? Mine is from Victoria Wood's Dinnerladies : "Tony Blair. Stick two poems up in a bus shelter and call it a university! ". Cracks me up every time

Ross: Don't you worry about me falling asleep, I still have your LETTER!

Ross has the funniest scenes.

When the rock star in the apartment above Frasier won't stop blaring his music: Doesn't he ever stop for sex and drugs!

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Another that gets funnier every time!

Not a sitcom but Bet Lynch in Corrie, after someone referred to one of the pub regulars being well-dressed. "Well-dressed? I've seen wounds better dressed than 'im!"

From AbFab:
Eddie : Inside of me there is a thin person just screaming to get out.
Gran : Just the one, dear?

June Whitfield was perfect in the role.

Oh and Superhans This crack is very moreish
And when he's clearly forgotten what age his children in Germany are -- the twins ? What are they now? Fumf?

The priests are at the Craggy Island Fair
Ted: Why do they call it the Crane of Death?
Dougal: Some fella died on it last year.

@Ellemeg82 I was going to say the lovely horse. We played it in the car for the children to listen to and they all ended up crying not crying laughing, more make this stop crying.
I love anything from Fr Ted, especially the caravan scene when it falls over.

Kitty She said she was a radical lesbian feminist. I thought what would the Queen Mum do?
I do miss Victoria Wood. She was a genius

Taking of Frasier, Nile’s is introduced and responds “ah, my brother was already eminent when my eminence was merely imminent”

All of the wedding episode from Outnumbered but particularly towards the end

Dad - “You were specifically told no fighting, no swearing and no drinking alcohol”
Ben - “But I’ve been on my best behaviour all day”
Dad - “Then why were you hitting that boy and saying leave my bloody beer alone?”

"I am therefore leaving immediately for Nepal, where I intend to live as a goat."

and about 50 others from Blackadder!

Loved Bet: "'ang on, 'ang on, I 'aven't lit me breakfast yet".

Benidorm
Jacquline after Donald has died, having been asked if she would like to join others on a trip out “aww yes please, I’ll just go for a wee” then dives into the pool.

"Thwack" [kangaroo punches Phil in the face in Modern Family]

Jean's boyfroend Barry in dinnerladies

"I thought you said he looked like Richard Madeley"

"I meant Richard Whiteley"

When Rik Mayall tells the gas man he loves him in Bottom.. always makes me howl.

“That’s not even a word!”

”that is so NOT true”

”and you rambled on for 18 pages…. FRONT AND BACK”

“you made my girlfriend THINK!”

Love the friends one liners and love Frasier has been mentioned a few times. There’s a few in everybody loves Raymond as well that make me chuckle

Martin in Friday night dinner dancing like Elvis 🤣🤣

•   <strong><a class="break-all" href="https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0491402/?ref_=tt_ch" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Lieutenant George</a>e</strong> <strong>:</strong> Oh, sir, if we should happen to tread on a mine, what do we do?
<a class="break-all" href="https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000100/?ref_=tt_ch" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Captain Blackadder</a>r* <strong>:</strong> Well, normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump up 200 feet into the air and scatter yourself over a wide area.
  

The Thick of It has so many great lines, I always enjoyed:
"You're so back bench you've fallen off, out by the bins where I put you" 😂

And Peep Show:

"I follow a higher law, the musicians law- if it feels good do it!"

"Oh who's law is that, Gaddafi's law?!" 😂

Solid silver self cleaning sauce separator

H Bucket

I'll have a Bailey's please,
No Lynn they're sex people

From the incomparable Ronnie Barker in Porridge - Fletch is having a medical...

MO : Suffer from any illness?
Fletch : Bad feet!
MO : Paid a recent visit to a doctor or hospital?
Fletch : Only with my bad feet!
MO : Are you now or have you at any time been a practicing homosexual?
Fletch : What, with these feet? Who'd have me?

@Athena51 😂

Blackadder Goes Forth, “Private Plane”

”Eat knuckle, Fritz!” 🤣🤣