Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Funniest lines from a sitcom

463 replies

Kingsleadhat · 03/09/2023 14:44

Could do with a laugh at the moment, so I'm wondering what are people's favourite funny lines from a sitcom or film? Mine is from Victoria Wood's Dinnerladies : "Tony Blair. Stick two poems up in a bus shelter and call it a university! ". Cracks me up every time

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
Medee · 03/09/2023 18:20

Derry Girls-

Grandpa Joe about Gerry “who put 50p in the eejit?”

S. Michael after another of Jenny’s terrible plays. “The troubles lead to many atrocities… <big pause>… and now we can add that to play to them”

Purpleavocado · 03/09/2023 18:20

When Father Ted says he'll just tap out the dent
Dragonfly in Fawlty Towers
What is it about a group of people ordering an Indian or Chinese that it is unexpectable to eat you own food that you order yourself...

Minfor · 03/09/2023 18:23

Joey: ducks are heads because ducks have heads
Chandler: what kind of scary ass clowns came to you birthday?!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

TV
fetchacloth · 03/09/2023 18:24

Imnotswallowingthat · 03/09/2023 18:06

Bus wankers !

You beat me to it 😆.
From the Inbetweeners.

Maireas · 03/09/2023 18:24

Frasier again - Martin's loud girlfriend Sherry - "I always say laughter is the best medicine!"
Niles: "We must be in the placebo group".

Imnotswallowingthat · 03/09/2023 18:24

The ordering an Indian takeaway scene in Gavin and Stacy

“I can guarantee that Pete is already thinking about my bhunas - Pete, have you thought about my bhunas ?”

christonnabike · 03/09/2023 18:25

mrwalkensir · 03/09/2023 16:35

Reginald Perrin telling somebody that his creased suit was made of "crumpolene".

"I didn't get where I am today selling ice creams tasting of bookends, pumice stone and West Germany"

HB1974 · 03/09/2023 18:26

The Thick of It.

Stuart: when is a party not a party?

Peter Mannion: when it's at your house.

JackieQueen · 03/09/2023 18:27

Still Game:
Bobby: you're putting on the beef there, Jack
Jack: yeah, every time I shag your misses she makes me a sandwich

Original poster
Kingsleadhat · 03/09/2023 18:27

I've never seen Two Doors Down, I must look it out

OP posts:
Trenda · 03/09/2023 18:27

Derry Girls
Granda Joe when Jerry has voiced an opinion
"who put 50p in the eejit?"

2 Doors down - My friends and I use the phrase "I got * out of her " when one of our gang gives us a cup of tea or whatever when we visit. Always with a smug smile that makes the rest laugh.

BlackCatsAreBrilliant · 03/09/2023 18:27

These are small, those are far away (to paraphrase) - Father Ted.

BakedTattie · 03/09/2023 18:28

Clawdy · 03/09/2023 17:22

"Pretentious? Moi? " Fawlty Towers.

Yes!

also,

“There’s someone at the door Cybil”

”mrs room-no-like”

”Sssss….poons”

DialSquare · 03/09/2023 18:28

Ok, Chardonnay Chardonnay you pack of chunts.

Kath & Kim when Kim had been told that pronouncing it Cardonnay was wrong.

Original poster
Kingsleadhat · 03/09/2023 18:29

Jewelanemone · 03/09/2023 18:09

Frasier has the best lines - my favourite episode is Out With Dad where Marty has to pretend to be gay.

Best line - Roz's current boyfriend's parents visit Frasier's apartment, and they have huge noses. Dinner is cooking; the father sniffs and says 'Mmm, what's that I can smell?'. Marty, in his recliner, mutters 'Japan, probably.'

Marty - We call him Eddie Spaghetti
Daphne - Oh, does he like pasta?
Marty - No, he has worms

Probably Japan ! Hilarious 😂

OP posts:
BakedTattie · 03/09/2023 18:31

“You can have wafer thin ham as a vegetarian can’t you” - the royal family

Imnotswallowingthat · 03/09/2023 18:32

Any line from Early Doors, the best sitcom of the past 20 years.

Original poster
Kingsleadhat · 03/09/2023 18:32

Maireas · 03/09/2023 18:24

Frasier again - Martin's loud girlfriend Sherry - "I always say laughter is the best medicine!"
Niles: "We must be in the placebo group".

So witty 🤣

OP posts:
Original poster
Kingsleadhat · 03/09/2023 18:33

Early Doors was underrated. Hilarious and sensitive and moving at times

OP posts:
JamieFrasersfurrysporran · 03/09/2023 18:34

lookatgiraffenow · 03/09/2023 14:53

Pretty much all of the lines that come out of Christine's mouth in Two Doors Down. The script is fantastic and Elaine C Smith's portrayal is so clever and spot-on!!

She's brilliant

Boohooyouho · 03/09/2023 18:34

The whole salad scene in Gavin and Stacey with Doris.

Where’s the salad, (sticks two fingers up ) there’s the salad now leave me alone

Aposterhasnoname · 03/09/2023 18:35

Benidorm, Donald and Jacquline.

D. Fancy a cocktail?
J. Oooh, yes please.
D. Sugar rim?
J. Nah, just the drink.

DH and I quote this every single time we get a drink on holiday.

Meadowdog · 03/09/2023 18:37

The Brooklyn 99 cold open where a lineup of potential murderers have to sing a Backstreet Boys song.

MrsDanversGlidesAgain · 03/09/2023 18:38

Kingsleadhat · 03/09/2023 18:01

Frasier had some fantastic lines. The one about outfitting the dog with a megaphone when he was wearing a cone ..😂

'Men don't use sex to get what we want! sex is what we want!'

Ellemeg82 · 03/09/2023 18:38

Father Ted "That's the great thing about Catholicism it's so vague no-one really knows what it's all about"

Also Father Ted when they're entering the Eurovision song content and the "Lovely Horse" song.

There are literally thousands from the Simpsons but 2 of my favourites are "Marriage is like a coffin, and each kid is another nail.” And
"facts are meaningless, you can use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true"

Again there are lots from Alan Partridge but a fave is "Lynn you're laughing at weather" and "it's hotter than the sun!"