Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

DH has ruined the house

194 replies

Rabbitingonandon · 01/09/2023 09:03

He's tidied and cleared out the garage, so he can put an office in there. But we are left with a load of garage crap dumped in the house. I currently have suitcases at the bottom of the stairs, boxes and bags of stuff in the kitchen and on the sofa. The dining room table has water pistols and tennis rackets on it. I'm supposed to be wfh. I can only hope he plans to sort all this stuff but to where I don't know as there is literally no where for it to go

OP posts:
Mari9999 · 01/09/2023 15:01

@Rabbitingonandon
In my house any thing for which we do not have adequate storage and stored items that have not been used or opened in five years are all trashed. Important documents are both stored and copied and saved electronically.

I recently had to assist a relative clear out a deceased family members home, and it was in eye opener to see boxes and boxes of things tossed simply because they were unneeded, of little to no interest to her children (old report cards, honors and award certificate, old clothing, old house hold items, unidentified or unidentifiable photos ,etc. All of these things no doubt had meaning or value to her, and yet they all became just a chore for someone else to clean up.

This experience served to reinforce our policy of the 5 year disposal plan.

Scalottia · 01/09/2023 15:10

What is the point of this post? Just talk to him.

HMP70 · 01/09/2023 15:15

Rabbitingonandon · 01/09/2023 15:01

Yup, this. To confirm, he mentioned the idea of turning the garage into an office. He didn't say he would do it that same night while I was out. He insinuated that he would simply be moving stuff around in the garage to accommodate. Not clearing it out and dumping it the house. He was wfh for years and never needed a specific space for a desk. We don't have a spare room. I'm fuming over the mess,it will be left for me to take to the tip, for me to clear/sort, as he would happily live amongst the crap. I know if I ask him to sort it, then he say he'll do it. It won't be done for ages. I'll get pissed off. He'll get pissed off for me keeping asking him to sort.

Show quote history

Been there got the t shirt. Save anything you actually want, tell him that he's got till X date to get it out of you sight ( however long you think your tether is with it) Then organise for company, like clearabee to come & take junk to tip for you. There are a few reputable licensed ones about. I have used them a couple of times, saved you hauling it to the tip & all gone in one hit. As DH used to be a pack rat, learnt behaviour from his parents & kept every little thing. What finally broke him of it, was clearing his parents house after his father passed & Mother going into a retirement home. We had 15 skips! For a small terraced house. We then downsized & he chucked everything!!! We have nothing in the loft & use garage just for garden stuff & Christmas decs etc

BrainWontWorkAnymore · 01/09/2023 15:18

When he is out, can you get a friend to come round and dump it all back in there?

WhereYouLeftIt · 01/09/2023 15:22

Throw it all back into the garage. And I do mean throw, not place.

Mumsanetta · 01/09/2023 15:31

Tell him if it’s not sorted by X date you will put it all back in the garage. And mean it.

andrainwillmaketheflowersgrow · 01/09/2023 15:36

Just chuck it all back in the garage.

InSpainTheRain · 01/09/2023 15:42

That's awful of him - so he clears out his space, but clutters the whole of the rest of the house? Seems that probably a joint de-cluttering exercise is needed. Order a skip, be ruthless, it's very cathartic!

Oioicaptain · 01/09/2023 15:54

I would stack it between the wall and his side of the bed so that he can't get in and out properly. Then he will have to deal with it.

ihadamarveloustime · 01/09/2023 16:41

Rabbitingonandon · 01/09/2023 15:01

Yup, this. To confirm, he mentioned the idea of turning the garage into an office. He didn't say he would do it that same night while I was out. He insinuated that he would simply be moving stuff around in the garage to accommodate. Not clearing it out and dumping it the house. He was wfh for years and never needed a specific space for a desk. We don't have a spare room. I'm fuming over the mess,it will be left for me to take to the tip, for me to clear/sort, as he would happily live amongst the crap. I know if I ask him to sort it, then he say he'll do it. It won't be done for ages. I'll get pissed off. He'll get pissed off for me keeping asking him to sort.

Show quote history

Transport an annoying, inconvenient, dusty chunk of it to his side of your bed if gets annoyed/ argumentative/doesn't get on with it when you ask him to sort it immediately as it's not reasonable or fair for him to dump this job on you. You have enough on your late without cleaning up his messes.

WonderingWanda · 01/09/2023 17:37

Just ask 'What are we going to do with this? Is there room for storage in the new office or do we need to look at a shed?'. Or you could look for a shed.

NoSquirrels · 01/09/2023 17:40

Put it back in the garage until he has time to deal with it.

Give no fucks.

Paddingtonsmarmlade · 01/09/2023 17:41

Put it back in the garage in a big pile

Polis · 01/09/2023 21:53

What is the point of this post? Just talk to him

This. I am having a hard time believing that him converting the garage and would need to find another home for the stuff in the garage was a surprise.

DefinitelyYouNotMe · 01/09/2023 21:55

Maybe you want to read all OPs posts then you might not have such a hard time.

User13865890 · 01/09/2023 22:01

Tell him to get a shed or take it up the tip

Cherrysoup · 01/09/2023 23:05

Dump it in his car. This would infuriate me.

YukoandHiro · 01/09/2023 23:06

If the garage office is his, just put it in bags and move it back in there!!

ReleasetheCrackHen · 01/09/2023 23:07

Rabbitingonandon · 01/09/2023 09:03

He's tidied and cleared out the garage, so he can put an office in there. But we are left with a load of garage crap dumped in the house. I currently have suitcases at the bottom of the stairs, boxes and bags of stuff in the kitchen and on the sofa. The dining room table has water pistols and tennis rackets on it. I'm supposed to be wfh. I can only hope he plans to sort all this stuff but to where I don't know as there is literally no where for it to go

So? Help him out this weekend. Do tip, charity, keep piles and then jointly decide where the keep stuff is going to go. Some can go back in garage in storage boxes or you look at maybe getting a small garden shed. DH can take charity and tip stuff to drop off.

Don’t most partners work together on things like this?

AllSoComplicated · 01/09/2023 23:08

Sometimes I get lonely but then I come on MN and I'm ok with being single again. 😬

OhamIreally · 02/09/2023 00:19

AllSoComplicated · 01/09/2023 23:08

Sometimes I get lonely but then I come on MN and I'm ok with being single again. 😬

Yep.

DefinitelyYouNotMe · 02/09/2023 06:50

Chat has turned into AIBU.

“Well if you only communicate and do things together as a team.”

You are only allowed to post if you live in a perfect relationship and nothing goes wrong within that - ever. I wonder about the “what is the point of this post” comments, since there would be no MN otherwise.

ConnieTucker · 02/09/2023 08:09

Rabbitingonandon · 01/09/2023 15:01

Yup, this. To confirm, he mentioned the idea of turning the garage into an office. He didn't say he would do it that same night while I was out. He insinuated that he would simply be moving stuff around in the garage to accommodate. Not clearing it out and dumping it the house. He was wfh for years and never needed a specific space for a desk. We don't have a spare room. I'm fuming over the mess,it will be left for me to take to the tip, for me to clear/sort, as he would happily live amongst the crap. I know if I ask him to sort it, then he say he'll do it. It won't be done for ages. I'll get pissed off. He'll get pissed off for me keeping asking him to sort.

Show quote history

He deserves ro get pissed off, so dont worry about that.

tell him now youre pleased he has been able to carve himself some space but the objects he has moved need new homes by the end of today or he will need to move them back into the garage by lunch tomorrow.

PinkRoses1245 · 02/09/2023 08:14

“ I can only hope he plans to sort all this stuff”
do not talk to each other? Or go through the stuff together?

ReleasetheCrackHen · 02/09/2023 08:33

DefinitelyYouNotMe · 02/09/2023 06:50

Chat has turned into AIBU.

“Well if you only communicate and do things together as a team.”

You are only allowed to post if you live in a perfect relationship and nothing goes wrong within that - ever. I wonder about the “what is the point of this post” comments, since there would be no MN otherwise.

🤣 This has made my day. The very fact that partners communicate and work together as a team = perfect relationship now does it?

right, so all my relationships have been perfect by that awfully low bar. All my line managers and work colleagues too come to think of it.