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Original poster

DH has ruined the house

194 replies

Rabbitingonandon · 01/09/2023 09:03

He's tidied and cleared out the garage, so he can put an office in there. But we are left with a load of garage crap dumped in the house. I currently have suitcases at the bottom of the stairs, boxes and bags of stuff in the kitchen and on the sofa. The dining room table has water pistols and tennis rackets on it. I'm supposed to be wfh. I can only hope he plans to sort all this stuff but to where I don't know as there is literally no where for it to go

OP posts:
ElFupacabra · 01/09/2023 10:47

We have an important meeting this morning so I'm not mentioning the mess until later this afternoon. He will get pissed off when I mention it/,it will cause an argument.
Sounds like an incredibly healthy relationship…

CurlewKate · 01/09/2023 10:47

Ask him.

And book a skip.

babyproblems · 01/09/2023 10:49

You’ll feel much better if you get rid of everything that’s not really essential.
Im a convert to a more simple way of living, I’m always shocked when I go to people homes and they are suffocating in clutter and they can’t see how much crap they don’t need. Get rid. It’s very stressful on a subliminal level to live with a lot of possessions and live amongst clutter. Start sorting it into keep and Chuck and be ruthless. Get your DH to sort it aswell and don’t hang onto things you don’t use very regularly! Xx

MrsSkylerWhite · 01/09/2023 10:49

No he hasn’t. He’s made a temporary mess. I’m doing the same atm. It will all be sorted in a few days.

MarshyMcMarshFace · 01/09/2023 10:50

Ummm - you wfh too. Why isn't there an office on the garage for you?

LOL he has created an office space and dumped the stuff all over your WFH space.

I honestly would just put it all back until he deals with it properly.

Dillydollydingdong · 01/09/2023 10:51

Get a skip

toomuchlaundry · 01/09/2023 10:51

Why will it cause an argument?

Is the office for him, you or both of you? Had this been discussed beforehand?

Bumcake · 01/09/2023 10:53

Well, the content is a bit of an anticlimax after the title.

I cannot fathom posting on here rather than just saying “Oi, where’s all this shit going?”

TheCurtainQueen · 01/09/2023 10:54

Rabbitingonandon · 01/09/2023 09:15

There is literally shit everywhere, it looks like we are in the process of moving in. We have an important meeting this morning so I'm not mentioning the mess until later this afternoon. He will get pissed off when I mention it/,it will cause an argument. No idea what he is planning to do with it all or put it. Im fuming

Why will it cause an argument? He’s made a mess. He needs to deal with it. It really is that straightforward.

DoodlesMam · 01/09/2023 10:54

get a skip and put it all in there. and tell/ask him to put some storage shelving i the garage/office.....

HelpMeGetThrough · 01/09/2023 10:57

Well that was a let down.

I was expecting to read that he'd knocked down a load-bearing wall.

Polis · 01/09/2023 10:58

Well, the content is a bit of an anticlimax after the title.

I thought the same. Though I suppose “My husband has made the house a bit untidy” wouldn’t have had quite the same dramatic effect.

Feverly · 01/09/2023 11:00

Eh? Why would it cause an argument? Just tell him to get rid of it, it's entirely his problem. If he causes a fight, opt out. Decline any attempt to make it be your problem.

cornflower21 · 01/09/2023 11:01

HelpMeGetThrough · 01/09/2023 10:57

Well that was a let down.

I was expecting to read that he'd knocked down a load-bearing wall.

Precisely!😸😸🙈

JenniferBarkley · 01/09/2023 11:04

Rearranging like this always causes chaos, we've had to do it a few times over the past year due to building work. Doesn't sound like a big deal unless he thinks that's job done.

frozendaisy · 01/09/2023 11:07

Surely turning the garage into an office, so a considerable alteration, has been talked through at length?

I mean to do it right it's going to take a week or two. It will need fully insulating, electrics, flooring etc.

So have you not spoken about where the garage stuff is finally going to go?

Is there going to be some storage back in the garage? Or might you need to get a shed as well?.

Didn't you talk any of this through.

There is just no way H would embark on a project like this without us thrashing out most of the details.

So what did you agree beforehand.

andrainwillmaketheflowersgrow · 01/09/2023 11:07

It's normal for a clear-out to create a temporary load of mess - it's not like he's knocked through an external wall and buggered off abroad somewhere.

Just ask him where he's planning on putting everything.

Yalta · 01/09/2023 11:09

Has he moved everything out so he can do what he needs to convert the garage and then it will all go back when he has finished.

I have renovated places before and dh frets and adds stress to the project as he wants me to do everything in one morning and to put everything back each afternoon so everything looks tidy.
Except it takes the morning to remove everything.
He had no concept of building work. His mother got her kitchen in the 50s and it was exactly the same when they moved out 55 years later.

Things like the fridge freezer, washing machine and dishwasher were located in the garage as they would have had to redo the whole kitchen to fit things like those modern things in

midgemadgemodge · 01/09/2023 11:09

DoodlesMam · 01/09/2023 10:54

get a skip and put it all in there. and tell/ask him to put some storage shelving i the garage/office.....

Why skip stuff ?

Did I miss the part where they had agreed he wasn't going to convert the garage

or where he agreed that the stuff would have to be binned if he was to convert the garage ?

Yalta · 01/09/2023 11:11

Still trying to work out why the house is ruined.

cushioncovers · 01/09/2023 11:11

Why can't you just calmly ask him how he's getting on and what he plans to do with all the stuff in the house? Why does that lead to an argument?

Dropthedonkey · 01/09/2023 11:11

Presumably OP doesn't just want to stick it all in a skip, given there are kids' toys etc in there. She probably would likely to have them in somewhere like a garage. A garden shed seems a plan - it should have been sorted before emptying the garage.
Now it's in the house I assume he will see it as "your" problem OP?

midgemadgemodge · 01/09/2023 11:16

I would guess it leads to an argument because anyone who frames "temporary disorder whilst work is being carried out" as "ruining my house " is probably not phrasing things well during a discussion

I mean if your DH accused you of ruining the house instead of asking " what are the plans for all these ironing piles " you would probably get a tad irritated

HelpMeGetThrough · 01/09/2023 11:17

He's tidied and cleared out the garage, so he can put an office in there.

Assuming he's got the relevant permissions from the council to do this, depending on what he's doing.

fridaynight1 · 01/09/2023 11:21

Buy a shed and then either
Plan A - stick him in it.
Plan B - stick all the crap in it.