DD took morning after pill then had sex again!

[Yepyepye]

Is there a chance she could get pregnant? She absolutely does not want to be pregnant but for some reason thought that taking MAP once would protect her from all unplanned pregnancies this cycle. She is in a right state. She's 18 and her boyfriend is lovely (also 18); they both agree they are too young for parenthood. She would have an abortion if she was pregnant but would obviously rather not have to go through this. The unprotected sex (apparently the condom fell off) happened only a few days after her period finished, so she took it at the most effective time from what I can tell. She's now coming up to when her period would normally be due but has been told it might be late. She had unprotected sex the second time about 2 weeks after the first time / after she took the MAP.
I can't find out if Levonelle stops ovulation entirely or just delays it, different websites saying different things, so I don't know what to say to her!

I could weep with the stress!

Thank you

This. I feel for you OP and your daughter. Feel proud that your daughter and her boyfriend trust you and can talk to you about this.

She's not an idiot. She made a mistake, dealt with it, then (possibly) misunderstood the scope of the remedy.
She needs to ask someone with MD after their name, or at least a pharmacist. Telling her off won't help.

Although this is really a very stressful situation for you both, it’s clear you have a wonderful relationship with your daughter and have educated her very well. We’re all reckless at 18 and perhaps she will have learned a huge life lesson, get an early pregnancy test to enable early decisions. Once the stress is over be proud she came to you now. Sending positive thoughts from one mum of teenagers to another.

I’m really sorry to hear you are going through this.
This really is the most challenging stage to parent.
And those bitchy comments! Ignore them.
A conversation with her about her contraceptive options in a calm adult manner will make you feel better any way.
Any parent on here who has watched their kids do stupid shit that we have talked to them about not to do will understand how frustrating/ worrying the situation is for you.
unfortunately , raging hormones and risk assessments do go hand in hand .
Hang in there… you are not alone

Man you guys are all so harsh - she needs to do a bit of learning and possibly get a more trusty contraception (copper coil for me, fake hormones make me weird) but there is no need to be so rude people!

Try not to stress OP she’s close to her period anyway so you’ll find out either way soon enough, not a lot you can do in the meantime.

Well done to you as a parent being able to share these things.

Knowing this much info about your daughters sex, life is grim to be honest. And if they aren't sensible enough to know the ins and outs of contraception, and they shouldn't be having sex and she should be on the pill.

Everyone on here must be absolutely perfect in every aspect of their lives the way they go on. Sitting behind your screens preaching away.

I’m 35 now but on my first time at 18 we used a condom and it came off. I got the MAP to cover myself. Wish I’d been brave enough to discuss with my Mum though!
At the grand age of 32 having been with my partner 7 years and using condoms for 6 of those years (same brand, same type) another condom came off. We don’t know when or how but that’s what happened. Sometimes it just does! This time I didn’t get the MAP and it happened to be my most fertile day of the month. We were going to start trying later that year anyway so saved us months of trying!

Just because it didn’t happen to you, doesn’t mean it was stupid or idiotic. It sounds like advice online isn’t accurate at all. Yes it was risky behaviour but cut the poor girl some slack, it takes two to tango!

OP you sound like a great mum. Ignore the judgmental posters on here; the Patriarchy has arrived!! It makes me mad that young women ( all women actually ) are still judged so harshly, esp by other women. Those in glass houses......

Just got to wait it out and see what happens, but I'm sure you will handle it calmly and compassionately.

I really hope my daughter would be comfortable enough to talk to me about something like this when she’s older. You sound like you have a great relationship. I hope it all works out ok.

Bit harsh, but that's a really stupid mistake for an 18 year old to make..If I were you, I'd recommend the implant for pregnancy worries and condomsfor her sexual health..Teens these days are much more aware of what's out there...she needs to up her game..

Crikey, some nasties on here!

Bloody 18 year olds and their “logic”, which the don’t have!

when I think of myself at 18, 😱

She needs to take a pregnancy test. Levonelle is only 70% effective, the second time they had sex she could definitely have got pregnant.

So you have to be mature enough to have sex, then pass some sort of maturity test?

Who sets this test?

Who decides when she’s mature enough?

I thought sex came from desire?

I think it’s great that she’s comfortable enough to talk about this with you.
Lots of us have been in her position so try encourage her not to worry. Worry and stress will also delay her period.

I’ve taken the morning after pill. It aims to stop a pregnancy before ovulation but if you take the pill too late then it won’t work. If you have sex again later and ovulate later, after taking the first pill, then ideally you should take another one (this is what was explained to me by a pharmacist) The morning after pill can cause spotting in between periods or a delay in periods.
The best thing to do is to take a pregnancy test close to when she is due ti start her period.

She doesn't want to get pregnant, but had unprotected sex?? Old enough to drink, vote and drive but too immature to use proper contraception. Sounds like she wouldn't be trusted to take a pill every day & the injection would be better.

And she’s not going running to get mum, she’s able to talk to her mum, which is wonderful.

you clearly don’t see this as a positive? Why not?

They both need a kick up the proverbial and mister needs to use smaller condoms.

I would be mightily pissed off at my own 18dd for this.

Stupid and irresponsible.

Saying otherwise is BS. OP, it's great to be open but there is a limit.

God she's 18, didn't everyone make silly mistakes at that age?! I don't think at that age they can be expected to know the ins and outs of fertile days and ovulation etc, it was just a silly mistake and an oversight. I ended up pregnant at 18, as the condom broke but my bf (now DH) hadn't ejaculated, so we didn't think anything else of it until I felt "weird" a few weeks later. I had to have an abortion as that was the right choice for us at the time, and yes it wasn't great, and was upsetting and stressful, but it didn't define me, and certainly didn't mean we were wreckless or stupid. Just obviously not entirely clued up on how easy it was to get pregnant. You're lucky your dd is open enough to speak to you about everything op, must be lovely to have such a close relationship. I remember really wanting a hug from my mum when I was going through it, but I was so scared of her finding out. I'm nearly 40, and to my knowledge she still has no idea what I went through. Good luck to your dd. Fingers crossed everything works out for the best.

Well quite honestly, even if she is pregnant, thank goodness abortion is so accessible.

I got pregnant after taking Levonelle 😕

Tbh she should just wait for her period and take a test. It is what is now. She's not an idiot. She's 18. These things happen. If she needs an abortion shell know early and will be able to take the tablets. Shell be ok.

Jesus Christ. 🤦🏼‍♀️ we need to sort our sex education in this country. Pathetic.

Let’s do financial and nutrition while we’re at it.

I've heard that one of the pills prevents implantation but it sounds like she went on to have sex when she would've been ovulating - especially if she took the pill that delays ovulation.

I'm of the camp that thinks don't have sex if you can't manage being pregnant.

If the condom is slipping off, it could be they're reusing them or not withdrawing straight away after orgasm. And that he needs to hold the base of it as he comes out.

She might get "lucky" this time but it sounds like you need to have a serious chat about using contraception properly - and that there are consequences for failing to do so.

Curiously - why did she think it was called the morning after pill if it worked all month?

This is genuinely a big relief for me as I had a friend who had an unplanned ectopic pregnancy when she was very young and then it caused her a lot of heartache when she was older and wanted children.

I think they really need to fully understand and appreciate what the basics of having sex are... having unprotected sex comes with some limitation and it does not seem like they understand that. Taking an after morning pill after having unprotected sex is not a contraceptive strategy