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Original poster

Autistic Women Assemble! #2

982 replies

Nepmarthiturn · 06/08/2023 11:18

Helloooo lovely people, a new thread for a us to continue to chat and connect with other autistic women (small talk and word mincing not required). 😊

As before, anybody newly stumbling upon this is very welcome to join us (even if still awaiting diagnosis). But we'd be grateful if others could leave us alone please, like the NT man we encountered in thread #1. 🤣

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RainbowZebraWarrior · 20/12/2023 14:25

Psychoticbreak · 20/12/2023 03:37

Came across this today: Podcast 484: Hormonal Fluctuations and ADHD: Impact of Menstrual Cycle, Pregnancy, Menopause (additudemag.com)

I have yet to listen to it but looked at the write up and very interesting that a lot of women show more ADHD symptoms when going through peri.

Yes, my ADHD symptoms flared up when perimenopause started. The fact that Autism is amplified during menopause was the thing that sent me falling off a metaphorical cliff, though. I used to have a long running thread about it in the Neurodiverse MNers section.

RainbowZebraWarrior · 20/12/2023 14:27

TheShellBeach · 20/12/2023 10:26

No, I agree, Jellycats.
I'm also not going to plough through pages and pages of people saying that the unfortunate autistic girl's experience will "teach her resilience".

The cruelty and ableism in that thread are off the scale.

I've read the opening post and I'm not going any further, as it's too triggering and close to home with my DD. It would make me want to kill people.

Psychoticbreak · 20/12/2023 14:31

RainbowZebraWarrior · 20/12/2023 14:25

Yes, my ADHD symptoms flared up when perimenopause started. The fact that Autism is amplified during menopause was the thing that sent me falling off a metaphorical cliff, though. I used to have a long running thread about it in the Neurodiverse MNers section.

Show quote history

Have you a link to that thread? I would love to read it if so.

camelCase · 20/12/2023 15:59

I'm feeling a little burnt out, I've kept up reading this thread but just didn't have the energy to respond but I've pushed myself to do it today. Everything has been feeling too much lately and whenever that happens I retreat from everything even limited interactions like this thread.

I just wanted to say I hope you all have as calm and happy christmas as possible, especially those with younger children as I know how much the holidays with the lack of normal routine can throw them off.

Psychoticbreak · 21/12/2023 08:40

I am looking forward to a few days away from people. It is just me and kids this year and I have a tesco click and collect today and have the car filled with diesel (does anyone else bloody hate stopping for petrol/diesel? I find it such an inconvenience and wait till the light is on to fill up and i always fill it so I dont have to stop again for a couple of weeks) and all kids bits have been bought (all click and collect as i just cannot 'people' this week and I feel prepared now. Last day in work today for a week too which makes me very happy. Shall see today if my boss is giving us an xmas bonus but not holding my breath!

Jules912 · 21/12/2023 08:47

Sorry been a bit quiet here as both DD and I are exhausted by all the end of term stuff. They finish today which is good but she struggles with being out of routine over the holidays, and I struggle with getting very little down/alone time. Was getting very stressed as Amazon failed to deliver one of the Christmas presents but getting it replaced was actually fairly painless and best if all didn't involve having to use a phone.
I don't mind the actual getting petrol as I always use the pay at pump, but I drive so little ( I live in London and hate driving) that I don't naturally pass a petrol station so it always involves a detour.

RainbowZebraWarrior · 21/12/2023 10:00

@camelCase hope you have a gentle Christmas and feel a bit less burned out after some (hopeful) quiet time.

@Psychoticbreak yes, I absolutely hate stopping for diesel, so I've just filled the car up after the school run as it was empty and shouting at me! I often drive around taking it right to the wire and being down to 2 miles left. My Dad has spent years asking me to fill up at the half full point. Never likely to happen, as I just put off every time.

RainbowZebraWarrior · 21/12/2023 10:02

@Jules912 last day for my DD here, too. She needs the break badly, as she had 3 days non verbal last week. It's tough being out of routine, and even tougher getting back in the routine though. Hope you and your DD can have some much needed rest and peace (if possible - I also know that it's difficult)

Psychoticbreak · 21/12/2023 10:02

Oh I get it all the time that I am not supposed to wait on the light but like you I push it to the limits so much that twice I have ran out and broken down lol

RainbowZebraWarrior · 21/12/2023 10:05

@TheShellBeach I couldn't sleep last night due to the wind, so I was reading the fridge thread. I remember some of the whinging last year, but my god! It doesn't even make sense what some of them are whining about. Love all your cream (and Linney) I've added an extra tub of Roddas clotted cream to my order as I don't think one tub is enough.

Psychoticbreak · 21/12/2023 10:06

Fridge thread? Im in the office alone today so fancy doing nothing!

TheShellBeach · 21/12/2023 10:27

@Psychoticbreak the fridge thread is bonkers. There are so many thieves of joy on it.

I have never seen the fridge thread in previous years. I took it at face value when I discovered it yesterday, and I took a picture of mine.

I was a bit surprised to discover how contentious the thread was though.

@RainbowZebraWarrior I must stop eating so much Christmas pudding and cream. Actually, I must just stop eating so much.

Xmas Grin
Psychoticbreak · 22/12/2023 05:25

That thread is amusing. I mean if you dont think it is in taste you dont have to open it simple as.

I got about 5 hours sleep last night which is good for me. Finished up work for christmas yesterday and school finishes up today so we plan on an afternoon movie with snacks and not really sure after that.

RainbowZebraWarrior · 22/12/2023 08:23

Afternoon movie sounds good, @Psychoticbreak Yes, when I think of the "how much do you earn?" threads, or "950k to spend in Berkshire" for example, why are people fretting so much?

Anyhoo, it seems to have died down a bit now.

TheShellBeach · 22/12/2023 13:02

Anyhoo, it seems to have died down a bit now

That's because everyone has gone out to get their shopping, ready to take a photo of the fridge in all its glory later on today.

Xmas Grin
Original poster
Nepmarthiturn · 22/12/2023 13:41

@camelCase and @Jules912 good to see you back!

It can be such an overwhelming time of year. I am glad that my kids finished school last Friday, they have really needed some downtime before the Christmas weekend.

I've got some wrapping done. Trying to get stocking presents done now.

Have to go back to GP later this afternoon to be examined again because I now have pain in the other lung. 😩 Hoping this all goes away soon.

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Original poster
Nepmarthiturn · 22/12/2023 13:43

Fridge thread is a super weird idea!

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TheShellBeach · 22/12/2023 13:51

I don't disagree that the fridge thread is weird but I am quintessentially nosy so I joined in.

Am just about to go and have sherry and nibbles with my new neighbour. She introduced herself with "I'm xxxx and I'm autistic" so I responded with "I'm autistic too" and we've been pals ever since.

TheShellBeach · 22/12/2023 13:56

And in other news, my BIL died suddenly yesterday and I feel NOTHING. He was the husband of my vilest sister and he was as dismissive of me and my DC as she was.

So no. I won't be travelling 500 miles to go to his funeral.

My children completely agree and understand. They feel nothing, too. BIL and my sister were especially nasty to DS2 (the one who has just moved here).

BIL used to say that people should stop claiming benefits and just get better jobs.

Ugh.

Original poster
Nepmarthiturn · 22/12/2023 14:00

TheShellBeach · 22/12/2023 13:51

I don't disagree that the fridge thread is weird but I am quintessentially nosy so I joined in.

Am just about to go and have sherry and nibbles with my new neighbour. She introduced herself with "I'm xxxx and I'm autistic" so I responded with "I'm autistic too" and we've been pals ever since.

That is lovely!!

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Original poster
Nepmarthiturn · 22/12/2023 14:03

TheShellBeach · 22/12/2023 13:56

And in other news, my BIL died suddenly yesterday and I feel NOTHING. He was the husband of my vilest sister and he was as dismissive of me and my DC as she was.

So no. I won't be travelling 500 miles to go to his funeral.

My children completely agree and understand. They feel nothing, too. BIL and my sister were especially nasty to DS2 (the one who has just moved here).

BIL used to say that people should stop claiming benefits and just get better jobs.

Ugh.

Sorry to hear this. I hope you don't feel guilty. I do often worry how I'll react when I find out in the future that certain family members have died; that I should feel something but it will probably mostly be relief, and then I'll feel guilty. But you shouldn't if he and his wife have been so awful to you. Better to focus on people who actually love us back.

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TheShellBeach · 22/12/2023 16:21

Better to focus on people who actually love us back

Well said, Nep.

Have just spoken to the DS who now lives here and his response to his uncle's death was "C'est la vie" which kind of made me laugh.

Original poster
Nepmarthiturn · 22/12/2023 16:22

Lol! Well.... he's right! 🤣

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