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Original poster

No school holiday for DD

130 replies

Noschoolholiday · 04/08/2023 10:31

I'm feeling so guilty today. We both work full time and she spends most of the summer at holiday club, so it isn't different to term time.

This summer we will only have a week or two where we'll take time off and take her places and do stuff with her before she starts school again.

I remember having 6 weeks off at home and loving it as a child (my mum was a SAHM). I was getting a proper break before the new school year.

I'm feeling so sad that my DC will never have that experience. The guilt is really bad today :(. Anyone else? Are we doing life wrong?

OP posts:
Whataretheodds · 04/08/2023 10:32

What you expect described is normal for millions of children.

Does she get your time and attention at evenings and weekends? Is she enjoying the activity club?

happystory · 04/08/2023 10:34

Surely the holiday club is fun? It's not school so a change for her. Don't be hard on yourself, I'm sure she is fine.

DustyLee123 · 04/08/2023 10:35

Sounds normal to me. Some kids are in the whole holiday.

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3dogsandarabbit · 04/08/2023 10:37

Holiday club isn't the same as school plus she has 1-2 weeks with you as a family going out for days. Sounds lovely. You are doing great

prettygreenteacup · 04/08/2023 10:44

Also in the same boat, my DC are in childcare most of the holidays as both me and their dad work FT. I have a few days booked off for taking them places. Today they're dossing around at home whilst I work. Thankfully its the only day that this is the case.

Planning on a proper holiday with them next summer. But this is the reality of two working parents for a lot of kids. Life is too expensive to not work full time, for me.

XelaM · 04/08/2023 10:50

Does she enjoy holiday club? Can you book a short trip on the week you have off?

NewNovember · 04/08/2023 10:50

It doesn't sound nice, children put greater value on time with their parents then material things. Most posters will tell you it's fine because they have the sane guilt. You have identified the problem now you can take steps to resolve it. What's stopping you from being a sahm?

Phos · 04/08/2023 10:52

I hated being stuck at home for 6 weeks as a kid and would have rather gone somewhere to play and do fun stuff with other kids

princesslouloubananahammock · 04/08/2023 10:57

This is the same for many kids all over the country.... I thinks it's more rare to have kids with a stay at home parent these days. I know the local holiday club here was fully booked within days of opening for booking!

Obviously if you do feel it's issue for you and your family could you get a term time job? Take parental leave ? ( essentially unpaid leave)
Have your kids ever said they don't like going to holiday club? X

FlamingoFloss · 04/08/2023 10:58

NewNovember · 04/08/2023 10:50

It doesn't sound nice, children put greater value on time with their parents then material things. Most posters will tell you it's fine because they have the sane guilt. You have identified the problem now you can take steps to resolve it. What's stopping you from being a sahm?

The OP has already said that both parents need to work full time for financial reasons. She’s already feeling guilty (although she shouldn’t as she is providing for her family). This is also the same situation for so many families up and down the country. It was the same for me when my son was young - I had 20 days holiday a year and so he had to go into holiday club. As a parent you do what you have to do and it’s balancing the needs of your family with what you can afford.

Parker231 · 04/08/2023 10:59

NewNovember · 04/08/2023 10:50

It doesn't sound nice, children put greater value on time with their parents then material things. Most posters will tell you it's fine because they have the sane guilt. You have identified the problem now you can take steps to resolve it. What's stopping you from being a sahm?

Perhaps the Op needs or wants to work - I wanted to continue with my career. DT’s had a brilliant time at holiday clubs - they did some craft and forest style ones when they were younger and then different sports, musical theatre, mad scientist as they got older. They still had family holidays and did plenty of activities with DH and I.

TooManyPlatesInMotion · 04/08/2023 10:59

Don't feel guilty - what you describe is perfectly normal for many families.

Your DD will enjoy the holiday club! My DD is at a club this week and asked to go back next week as she's enjoying herself so much, making new friends, doing loads of crafts etc.

We haven't managed a holiday this year, and I do feel for the kids as they have to listen to friends' tales of lovely trips away . . .

AutumnalPumpkin · 04/08/2023 11:00

This sounds better than my little ones summer holidays.
I'm a SAHM and will be looking to work when DD starts school this September.. but we cannot afford to keep her occupied with days out and all the fun activities each week. She broke up from nursery earlier than school finished so by the time she starts school (sept 8th) she will have had near enough 9 weeks off.
We are all bored and frustrated even with trying to do things to keep her entertained.
If I could afford to send her to a summer camp at least a few days a week, I would, I feel it would be much more enjoyable for her.
You're doing great

itsmyp4rty · 04/08/2023 11:01

I'm sure they're not making her do maths at holiday club! Plenty of kids end up really bored over the long holidays as well. Just make the most of the time you do have with her.

KleineDracheKokosnuss · 04/08/2023 11:02

My kids have had two weeks at home so far and just begged me to go back to school. They are going to a camp next week.

for many kids, summer is camp and scheduled activities. It’s not a bad way for them to spend time.

Somethingsnappy · 04/08/2023 11:02

Does she enjoy the holiday club?

Campervangirl · 04/08/2023 11:04

My dd spent most of her holidays in a club, she had a blast, swimming, rollerblading, disco, crafting, trips out etc.
I still felt guilty, mum guilt is real.
Give yourself a break, can you afford to do things at the weekend or after work, trip to the cinema, park, picnic tea in the garden, movie night and make popcorn (we loved making popcorn, jumping out of our skins when the corn started to pop, would the saucepan lid be able to contain all the popcorn, exciting stuff😁)

skgnome · 04/08/2023 11:04

Have you seen all they offer Ona holiday club?
most holiday clubs have a full schedule allowing lots of play time and great activities
yes there’s an age where they don’t want to go, and that’s fine
but it’s not like school, it’s fun and they make new friends
if it’s not you just need to find a better suited club

Diddykong · 04/08/2023 11:05

DH and I work from home so we had DD at home last week. She's begged to go into camp next week because she's bored. We've taken breaks to do crafts, bake, play games, take her out to lunch but ultimately she's craving interaction with her peers.

Plus we are still in shadow of COVID lockdowns so spending all day in the house and garden just makes us all feel stifled.

MissAmbrosia · 04/08/2023 11:08

My dd loved the holiday club so much, that when she turned 16 she did the animation training and now works there over the Uni summer holidays. Belgian school summer holidays used to be nearly 9 weeks long. We would go away for 2-3 weeks but otherwise there wasn't much choice but to sign up her for various activities.

Oloi · 04/08/2023 11:12

It's extremely different to term time as she's not at school.

luckylavender · 04/08/2023 11:18

NewNovember · 04/08/2023 10:50

It doesn't sound nice, children put greater value on time with their parents then material things. Most posters will tell you it's fine because they have the sane guilt. You have identified the problem now you can take steps to resolve it. What's stopping you from being a sahm?

🙄

floribunda18 · 04/08/2023 11:18

My parents both worked too in the 1980s and there were no holiday clubs. I would spend a week or two with grandparents and various aunties. Wasn't great and I was quite bored and would rather be at home sometimes but it wasn't too bad and didn't do me any harm. Not sure what else they could have done. We usually went to Devon for a couple of weeks too. If one of them didn't work we wouldn't have been able to do that.

GandTtwice · 04/08/2023 11:19

My now adult/older teen DCs went to holiday clubs throughout their childhood summer holidays apart from our annual leave - they loved it and still now talk about the things they did there. They had the chance to do outdoor activities they wouldn't normally do, they made new friends and generally became more independent.
Holiday clubs aren't a bad experience and your DC will still get to spend some quality time with you. You have no need to feel guilty for doing the best you can

floribunda18 · 04/08/2023 11:20

Also my dad was made redundant at least twice in the 1980s and one time was out of work for six months- quite common then as the government was running down the industry he was in deliberately. If my mum didn't work we'd have been stuffed. Though I enjoyed the times my dad was at home with me.

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