Teacher friends in summer...every single time...

[Nursenance]

I'm not a teacher. I have a lot of teacher friends.
Every single summer I get texts saying 'let's get together over summer' , 'we need some days out over summer'.
Similar texts every school half term/Easter/Xmas.

It drives me nuts! I am still at work and in my routine. My weekly routine continues through the year. It's like an assumption that cos they not busy noone is!

For the rest of the year its always they too busy to text, can't meet cos working/marking.

I wouldn't be a teacher for all the tea in China but just drives me insane when they don't seem to realise that the rest of the world does not exist for school holidays.

I save a few days AL for my teacher friends. I feel bad as they miss out on weekends away that we non teachers take, because others cant afford the extra cost to go away in school holidays when the teachers are available. So i feel it's the least I can do.

@Ghosttofu99 it really Ramps up from A level results day then doesn’t calm
down till January. I have to use leave but eg oct half term is usually turned down. So apart from Xmas it’s relentless.

i get that teachers keep
their heads down for the half then come up for air on the break.

I have a teacher friend who will NEVER meet me outside of the school holidays. She doesn’t have children, I do. And if I do happen to be off during the holidays she doesn’t get why I’ll have the children with me when we do meet. When she was getting married I was bridesmaid and all the prep I.e. dress fittings hen do were mid week in school holidays. Obviously this was fine if it suited her but there was zero understanding of why some of us couldn’t make the vast majority of the dates.

think this is just her personality though, rather than because she’s a teacher

That’s interesting - I always assume teachers get at least five or six weeks in summer and another four weeks during term time for Easter and Christmas and Halloween and half terms.

so in your school they work these holidays unless they have booked days off out of a normal 25 or 30 day annual allowance?

think this is just her personality though, rather than because she’s a teacher

I think that's the key here. I make time for my friends even though I'm one of those dreadful teachers not from the real world.

Everyone assumes their working pattern is the norm. I get frustrated on here all the time because people forget that thousands of normal people regularly work weekends, nights, Christmas.

Schools operate as if people have ‘family time’ at weekends many parents might be scrabbling for care at weekends and prefer kids to have Wednesdays off school, attractions assume this too. Events are often scheduled for Saturdays, usually one of us is working. Childcare is available for people who work weekday daytimes only which is baffling considering all the people who save our lives (healthcare staff, firefighters etc) are likely to be at work 24/7. We wonder why we have a shortage, how are they supposed to have children and work?

Teachers may act like others are free in school holidays, they know they’re not but a good percentage of their friends are likely also teachers. On the other hand teachers probably get invited to weddings and joint holidays in June which there is no way they can attend and shift workers find others lack of flexibility to arrange shifts around the school play a bit baffling.

Majority of teachers do not have much time over term time weekends, hence their excitement to live their life a little during the longer holidays (they will still be working during some of the holiday times) their 'let's meet up over the summer' is their sigh of relief that they can actually have a life for a bit.

NO ONE understands the life of a teacher unless you are closely related to one or married to one. Hence why the job drop outs are the highest they have ever been. Teachers are burnt out and most schools only have new teachers who haven't reached the burn out stage yet. It really is just impossible and pointless to even bother explaining, people will only jabs an understanding, as I said if they are married to a teacher/have a close relative.

If you are a parent and your child has a teacher in September be grateful, as there are hardly any out there anymore and the recruitment of trainee teachers for this coming September is even more dire sadly.

Hopefully that gives a little more perspective and understanding as to why your friends say they hope to see you over the Summer.

I can't get worked up about it. I work on Saturdays and my weekday working friends all hold events in Saturdays. My closest friend is a teacher and I know how hard she works during term time and how difficult it is for her to do stuff. Her planning social events us about her capacity to do things, not her assumption that nobody else is working. During term time she gives herself one weekend evening and one weekend half day off work, but she doesn't moan if people plan stuff that doesn't fit in with her pattern if working very intensively during term time and having a break in the summer.

Hi, they have an annual leave allowance and the school stays open 51 weeks per year, closes for Christmas week. It's in a hospital, and the children can't be left too long without education/activities.

Sorry that was for jennyjones198080 x

Do you and your friends have children OP? If so, I'd imagine that the reason they are asking you is that the children are off school and so they assume that you might have some time off with them. Also it's nicer to meet up in summer when the weather is nice and you can be outdoors. I could have written that message, and I work full time in term holidays also.

Ah thank you 😊

And yet you started yet another MN thread to bash us? Use your words and talk to your friends about your frustration.

I’m with you but how dare you criticise a teacher!

Teachers and doctors both assume the world plays to their tune, that’s what my grandma used to say.

I assume you’re joking as this is hilarious.

Surely it’s a general “are you free” and doesn’t imply that it has to be a weekend?

I mean I’m a teacher so I can meet at weekends and maybe evenings during term time but yes I probably do reach out a bit more in the holidays because I’ve got more time…..but I know a lot of my friends are at work in the week so it’s a general “when is anyone free” rather than “hey I’m off in the weekdays let’s have fun”

I could say the same thing when my non teacher friends send out open invitations for days out or long weekends away in term time which I can’t do (or can do a reduced version of in terms of long weekends). I don’t take it offensively and I doubt your teacher friends are trying to be offensive either. Just the way it is. Swings and roundabouts to every job.

This thread is an unusual approach to teacher bashing and will be followed by another at the end of the summers holidays when those who chose to have children can’t wait to see the back of them and clamour for schools to provide child care. Followed by the hard of thinking who complain about INSET days at the start of term.

I think that covers it.

No we don’t. Some do. Just like sone parents expect everyone around them to adapt to their new lifestyle with children and work round them. Thankfully it’s not all :)

DH & I get the reverse of this, we are university academics and our family members assume we have the 'holidays' off. No, we don't. We get set AL, which must be booked off and is 35 days over the year and we need to manage childcare for DD.

Wow 35 days is brilliant! Well above average

Exactly This!

Yes, but it's not the 'holidays' for either HE or Schools, which is the assumption

I don't know why meeting up with teacher friends is an issue.

There's the summer holidays, there's Halloween half-term, then there's Christmas. If none of those work for you, there's half-term in February, then Easter, then May.

I have to request my 31 days' annual leave in advance, with no guarantee that my request will be accepted.

That was in reponse to @jennyjones198080 btw