Your stage of parenting at 40

[Isthistherealworldisthisjustfantasy]

Where are you at?
How do you feel about it?

I'm 40 and have a young family. I had my last baby last year. Still breastfeeding.

In my mind, I feel like I'm late 20s/early 30s and my stage of parenting kind of fits in with this delusion.

A few days ago, a father and son were on Instagram. The dad was 41 and the son was a big strapping 22 year old man, and at first, my husband (who is 41) was a bit discombobulated. I reminded him that we are old enough to not just have adult children, but grandchildren too. We sat there with our minds blowing. We do understand the maths, obviously, but we feel in such a different stage of life to our biological ages.

We started talking about how a woman has quite a long season where she can potentially get pregnant. I just saw on the news that Natasha Hamilton, who is 41, is pregnant, and I had a moment of feeling a pang of envy before I reminded myself that while I'd love another child, we are stopping at the 3 we have. I know that lots of 40 year old women would be horrified at the thought of pregnancy as their children are teens or adults.

Anyway, I think around 40 is a unique period of time in a woman's life where she can technically be a grandmother and still get pregnant and I was wondering where you all are by 40!

How old are your kids? Have you any grandchildren? Did you have all of your kids when you were young, spread over time or not until later? How would you feel if you got pregnant now? How would you feel if you became a grandmother now? Has anyone experienced both at the same time?

At 40 I was child free. I became a mum at 45, mum of two at 46. Like you, I feel much younger than my (same age) friends with children now leaving uni.

I’m 45 and have a six year old and a one year old and still breastfeeding so very much in the thick of it 😁

Childfree and working abroad.

I came home and had ds when I was 45.

At 40 my youngest was 11. I would have said I felt too old and tired to cope with a baby (and it would have been impossible anyway since I'd been divorced for 8 years), but actually two of my siblings had babies that year and I've been heavily involved in the care of one of them and it's been fine, I have plenty of energy for her. I do feel quite broody, but not enough to want to try marriage again. So I'm done with kids, but I think physically I'd be able to do it (financially I would not).

At 40 I had a newborn and a two year old. I'll be 42 this year.

40 when I had my son, and 42 when I had my daughter.

I'm 40 this year, my ds 17 and dd 13. Lots if my friends are in the thick of the baby/ toddler years and I'm very glad I had mine when I did, as they've got older I've progressed in my career and they can be left unattended whilst I go the gym/ shops etc with no problem and they're lovely to be around. I don't think I'd manage sleepless now.

I had my first at 40. I'd like another but suspect I'm perimenopausal and it's unlikely to happen.

I’m 42. My eldest is 20, my youngest 14. There’s a couple inbetween.

At 40 my kids will be 17 & 13. Absolutely no chance I'm having anymore at this age.

40 with a 6 & a 4 year old. Couldn't do another!
Was a weird moment recently when an 18yr old student was the daughter of a someone in my class at school. At first I thought wow she must have had her really young, but no, just 22 😅 older than I realise 😆

Not 40 yet but when I am my children will be 16, 14 and 13.

At 40 mine were 16 and 14.
The thought of having another would be met with howls of laughter 😂

50 and mother to a 27 year old and a 4 year old both mine I carried both fed both and love them both and that I have been able to give each my undivided attention, my oldest was in her first year of work after graduation when I got pregnant for my youngest the year my husband turned 60 😏

When I’m 40 I’ll have a 15 year old and a 10 year old.

38 (so not far off 40) with a 3 and 6 year old. I.am.tired! I love it, I love them. Considered a third but don’t think I can do it….I really do feel my age (still pretty shocked I’m 38 and not 25!) but my body tells me otherwise.

im 35, but the time I’m 40 I’ll have a 20 &15 year old….
I plan on going on loads of little road trips as they will be old enough to look after themselves 😂

I’m 38 and by the time I’m 40 I will have 9 children ranging from 19 to 2 years old!

When I'm 40 il have a 25, 23 and 20 year old so will most likely have grandkids 😬

42 next week, DH the same age, and we have an almost one year old and an eight year old, I have friends with teenage and adult children, but a lot that have young children. I don't feel 40 really.

At 40 I had a 10 year old, 8 year old and 4 month old

At 40 I had an 18 year old, 12 year old and a nine year old.

I'm 43 now and glad I'm past the wee one stage. I wouldn't have the energy now and enjoy getting away for stress free weekends and holidays away with my husband (and the kids)
I sometimes get a pang of nostalgia when I see families with wee ones out and about, the days of picnics, parks, trips to the pet shop for fun. Then I remember the early rises and long days and when I thought going to work was a break.
I'm at another parenting stage now and really enjoying it.

45, Daughter is 27, son is 20 and I have a 2 year old granddaughter. Perfect.

After multiple losses and heartbreak 10 days before my 39th I had my first DC followed by twins at 41. Im now 49. I so wish I had kids when I was younger and had my mum around to be part of their lives. I am very envious of people who have those baby/ young kids/Santa years spread out longer. My good friend had her first at 18 and has the magic of Santa etc for over 20 years. She had her 40th recently she’s gorgeous and very youthful and has just learned she is going to be a grandmother.

At 40 I was pregnant with my 2nd & had a 1 yr old. I’m 55 now, dh is 54, ds is 16 dd is 14. I would have had loved a 3rd but we’d got 1 of each and dd was a nightmare baby. Now the kids are old enough dh can have days & evenings out.