Son hurt me. With this (pic)

[271726a]

My son is 16 he kept going on at me over food . I feel ill. I have food in freezer /cupboards . He does not want it. He would not leave me alone. I feel total shit. My other kids are ill as well. I told him to leave me alone.

He then went to his room. He still kept messaging me over food. I'm the end I went to his room and said stop we are ill you need to stop your 16 your old enough to sort yourself food.

He told me to get out . I did I closed the door. He then came out a throw a bottle at me. It don't seem like much but it really hurt . He's been aggressive in the past. And really nasty . But he's never physically touched me.

I can't take this anymore. I told him tp leave he's gone I have no idea where i think he will contact out of hours social services.

How would he know to contact out of hours social services? Are they already involved?

This a million times over.

Apart from the fact that at 16, he is well beyond the point of criminal responsibility, he's also going to be significantly taller and stronger than the woman he has committed a violent criminal offence against.

I agree.

A 16 year old angry, entitled teenager isn’t going to resolve any of that by being rejected by their family.

It sounds like there's a lot more to the dynamic than what's written here.

Hes been aggressive to me for a long time, as in years. Hes very aggressive verbally. And he actually gas lights people. I called the police once when he was smashing up my house they took 6hrs to arrive and done nothing. He tries to have control on the whole house

He does have some mental heath issues . He's seeing CAMHS I know they are looking into ADHD and have spoken about emotional disregulation. But either way that does not mean its ok to be physical.

If I let this go it tells him he can treat me that way and have even more control. And what's that showing my kids .

It sounds like you’ve had some dealings with social services - why else would your son know to phone the out of hours service?

Are they in contact with your family much?

Is his father on the scene?

The boy is 16, still a child. No matter what, he's your responsibility, OP. He threw a bottle (plastic, I assume. It didn't break). You didn't need to follow him to his room. Teenagers are awkward and difficult, but it's not normal to disown your son because of that.

Where is this boy's father?
His father is the person who should be teaching him how to be a decent man.

Agree with this

What would you do in your home if they threw a bottle at you? Whip them up a lasagna?
i would worry about why he has done it , try to understand what had happened and work on it never happening again.
I wouldn't throw him out. A 16 year old is vulnerable.

No doubt his father is another useless waste of space man.

Hes 6ft4. I'm 5ft 5 he's stronger than me. I grt out of breath just from walking across a room tidying up etc. Walking up the stairs . Not due to the bug I have. Probably something under lying. Either way I'm not physically healthy enough to take physical stuff from him.

Theses replies are honestly awful

Both parents need to teach him

That changes everything, this isn't a once off.
Your OP was missing this very important background.

@CovertImage He's assaulted her so it's not about sorting out his own effing food is it? Maybe he's got his "irrational behaviours" from his maleness

Maybe he hasn't learned how to manage himself from appalling parenting. Throwing out a 16 year old onto the streets indicates pretty low quality parenting has happened to date.

I am so so sorry OP, I'm devastated for you to get these responses.

I've seen a few threads recently about similar topics, I don't know if it's because it's the weekend of if it's because ND hasn't been mentioned, but the responses on this thread are so vastly different to the ones on those, and the ones on those have even younger children involved!

You shouldn't have to bare all to get advice. A back story might be useful for shared experiences and better advice, but at the end of the day your son who is likely much bigger and stronger than you has at least begun to be physically violent over an issue I would expect my 6 year old to be able to cope with let alone a 16 year old.

I really hope you are okay I would see if you can get this thread moved to a more appropriate topic where posters actually have a clue what they are on about, maybe children's mental health?

Wish I had some good advice for you OP. What an awful situation.

People should ask rather than just judge abd make assumptions. I just done a quick sort of post because I felt emotional and over whelmed about today . I'm also a bit frightened of what to post because I can't take more shot being thrown at me

Don't blame the bloody OP it's so clear as day this woman is at the end of her tether, her "missing important" info does not justify the barrage she received.

It really doesn't. Hope you can find help offline, OP. The responses here are awful.

Good luck.

I don’t think it’s fair to say he’s had ‘terrible parenting’ although he’s almost certainly been affected by it. The OP sounds pretty vulnerable health wise and even though it’s not right this can provoke emotions and feelings that people, but teenagers especially, don’t really know how to deal with.

Fwiw I don’t think the idea of him living elsewhere is necessarily a bad one, it’s clearly doing no one any favours at the moment, but kicking him out in a highly charged emotional situation isn’t going to result in anything positive for anyone either.

Children sometimes lose their temper and throw things.
He's not a 5 yr old, he's a full grown bully.
As for their saying terrible parenting is to blame are very ignorant, you can be the best parent and still your kids have issues.