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Original poster

Wee in the night as a house guest

162 replies

TimeSlipMushroom · 17/06/2023 09:37

Currently staying the weekend with friends to attend an event away from home.

I needed a wee in the night and friend has made it very clear that she's not very happy and thinks it's bad form. Apparently people can hold it in. (I was a quiet as possible but did put a light on and flush the loo due to time of the month)

Now feeling anxious about tonight which will probably make me need a wee even more!

I hate confrontation but don't know what to do. Advice/hints/perspective please

OP posts:
Original poster
TimeSlipMushroom · 17/06/2023 19:37

Thanks for all the replies. I'm really surprised that the general consensus is that friend is being unreasonable.

To answer some of the questions: friend raised this as a "general issue" issue infront of everyone and I think knew it was me. No one else said anything so I assumed they all agreed but who knows.

I haven't spent any time alone with friend today and there's lots more people here for the evening so I haven't discussed anything. I find dealing with any conflict very difficult mainly I think due to past experiences (and yes, controlling relationships as one poster asked). I know I have some work to do on myself.

Event continues tomorrow and we have train tickets home then so not really an option to go anywhere. Plus DS is enjoying himself loads and I mostly am.

OP posts:
Original poster
TimeSlipMushroom · 17/06/2023 19:39

Ps. Thanks for the phone camera tip. Don't know why I didn't think of it

OP posts:
KarmaIsMyBF · 17/06/2023 19:39

Surely it's better to do to the toilet than to soil the bed?

People are mental!

MucozadeOnLucozade · 17/06/2023 21:03

Are her kids not allowed to use in night either then??

NineOfNine · 17/06/2023 21:23

To answer some of the questions: friend raised this as a "general issue" issue infront of everyone and I think knew it was me. No one else said anything so I assumed they all agreed but who knows.

It’s possible that the others disagreed, not that no one else said anything because they wanted to avoid starting an argument, or appearing to be making a fuss.

NineOfNine · 17/06/2023 21:24

Should have been “but that”, rather than “not that”!

dickheed · 17/06/2023 22:43

No one else said anything so I assumed they all agreed but who knows

No, OP, they won't have agreed unless they are as fucking batshit as her, they will have just kept quiet to avoid a conflict, probably thinking to themselves "fuck you, I'll wee as many times as I like in the night".

It's also possible that other people went to the toilet in the night too - you might not have been aware of that.
The woman is absolutely batshit and really shouldn't invite guests if she doesn't want people pissing in the night. A lot of people do need to piss in the night and I'm sure she would rather they used the toilet than pissed in a wardrobe or out of a window.
Stupid woman.

I hope you can see how ridiculous this is and deliberately go for a piss 3 or 4 times tonight for a laugh, that's what I would do. Nobody gets to restrict your access to a toilet.

Laura23FE · 17/06/2023 22:47

Your friend is mental

Cherrysoup · 17/06/2023 22:50

Omg, I need at least 2 wees during the night, your friend is crazy to think you can control it. Being told to hold it would make me super anxious.

JudgeAnderson · 17/06/2023 22:50

OP I hope you do use the loo tonight as and when you need it, it's a basic human necessity.

FrankieStar · 17/06/2023 22:51

OP, go for a wee (or poo if needed!), as often as you need to tonight. Fuck it. She's clearly crazy and you know not to stay with her again after this, and she sounds really mean!

If she brings it up again, you're well within your rights to tell her to piss off. Pun intended.

You've done nothing wrong x

Soproudoflionesses · 17/06/2023 23:18

Your host is fucking nuts!!!

kentmum50 · 17/06/2023 23:26

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

DennySaid · 17/06/2023 23:37

I had a friend who did this to me when we were both eleven. Even at eleven I thought it was truly stupid, and would have expected more maturity from her…

Northernsouloldies · 18/06/2023 03:35

You can't sleep if you need to pee, your brain simply doesn't allow it you got to get up n pee. Your friend is a nut.

uncomfortablydumb53 · 18/06/2023 04:35

Your friend is ridiculous
A good friend, and a decent host
Would want you to feel comfortable. So strange for her to mention it, I honestly think I'd leave early

SallyWD · 18/06/2023 08:25

So did you wee last night OP?

Sewingdufus · 18/06/2023 19:21

She is being extremely unreasonable, rude too. Maybe she’s wanting to put you off staying with her again?

The thought that I couldn’t use the bathroom through the night would make me need it even more. I usually use it at least once in the night, I don’t sleep particularly well and usually worse when I’m away from home.

ohdamnitjanet · 18/06/2023 19:40

Ditto ditto ditto - she is absolutely fucking nuts. Plus it’s no one’s business about your period, you do not have to explain why you need a wee to her or anyone else.

grapehyacinthisactuallyblue · 18/06/2023 19:46

It's really stupid to say people can hold it. Maybe it was better if you didn't turn the lights on, but still, did they rather wanted you to wet yourself?

I've stayed with a friend when i was younger, went out drinking together and got up middle of the night, it was a one bedroom flat, so I didn't turn the lights on, but surely woke my friend up. I didn't feel guilty at all.

Mariposista · 18/06/2023 19:58

I would not even be justifying myself but would be reading her the riot act. Using a toilet is a basic human health and hygiene right - even prisoners in custody have the right to one! How dare she play her face.

Jesseweneedtocook · 18/06/2023 20:09

Your friend is being absolutely crackers op, and if I were you I'd be telling her so and promptly leaving her to crack on with the madness on her own whilst checking into a hotel and never contacting her again unless she apologised. Literally how dare she try to regulate your normal body functions. Absolutely pathetic. Don't host humans if you don't want human behaviour occurring in your home!!

Kentkittypie · 18/06/2023 20:33

She's not much of a friend. I wouldn't be switching on lights though I'd use my phone and try to be a quiet as possible. Yes she might get woken up and she may be someone who then struggles to get back to sleep again- but it's 2 nights so she should get over herself!

QuinnofHearts · 18/06/2023 20:36

Piss the bed. It's the only way.

2bazookas · 18/06/2023 20:56

Your host is being unspeakably rude and inconsiderate. It's absolutely normal for guests to get up to wee in the night

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