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Original poster

End of a 6yr olds party- no party bag

413 replies

Just4this1 · 05/06/2023 16:15

NC! Quick one- end of a party, nothing handed out to the children- (money not an issue)- would you think rude or perfectly fine?

OP posts:
Ifeellikeateenageragain · 05/06/2023 17:53

Perfectly fine - in fact preferable. The majority of the party bags have plastic crap that most kids play with on the way home and then never again.

Noicant · 05/06/2023 17:53

I would be bloody delighted to not get loads of plastic bits and pieces. I probably wouldn’t notice and certainly wouldn’t think it rude.

notacooldad · 05/06/2023 17:54

Although anyone telling me they were doing it for environmental reasons would have the same inner eyeroll as anyone who tells me they're giving charity gifts for Christmas
I didn't do them for two reasons. Sometimes it was because I was really broke. Other times it was because I couldn't be bothered.

toomuchlaundry · 05/06/2023 17:54

Glad to not have the plastic tat (although have teens now, so party bags not on my radar anymore)

originalglazedsingle · 05/06/2023 17:56

Kpo58 · 05/06/2023 17:51

What are people considering as partybags?
Can it be:
1/ a piece of cake wrapped in a napkin
2/ a book
3/ a sweet cone
4/ a bag full of plastic tat

To me a party bag can be any of the above 4.

Which ones are people objecting to?

I am guessing all of them 😂. It's very MN to look down and pretend to be morally superior, and of course from a upper class than the rest, because you don't "do" innocuous but common things, like serving birthday cake to a birthday 😂.

Give bags, don't give bags, it's pretty much a non-issue but the hatred and shock horror is a bit over the top.

HatchetJob · 05/06/2023 17:58

willWillSmithsmith · 05/06/2023 17:51

There was no such thing as party bags when I was growing up.

I remember getting them in the 1980s!

one year DDs birthday fell near Easter so I just got them all a small Easter egg each. That was a good easy year.

MyDecadent70sArmpits · 05/06/2023 17:58

My dds are now adults but I do remember very clearly a party that I threw where craft featured heavily so all the kids had whatever it was that they had made to take home and a slice of cake. One child felt the absence of a party bag was so outrageous they came up at the end and gave me a proper grilling about why there wasn’t one, and exactly how they felt about it.
I sometimes laugh at the memory of a six or seven year old with hands on hips telling off a grown ass adult for the lack of a bag of shite after I had just put on several hours of entertainment and fed them.

Oh man their mother was MORTIFIED 😂

Goldbar · 05/06/2023 18:00

Comedycook · 05/06/2023 16:20

I'd find it awkward as I know my DC would be expecting one and I'd have to whisper in hushed tones that not everyone does them and not to make a fuss or say anything!

This. Fine with me but I'd have to gag my child on the way out.

AddieLoggins2 · 05/06/2023 18:00

Can't help but notice everyone who's saying it's fine not to give them is saying it because they hate them.

But the adults aren't actually the guests. The children are! The adults are just the taxi service

My children love party bags and would be disappointed not to get one. They would definitely rate the party down if they didn't get one. Not saying it would be a major issue, but it would be noted.

In the same vein my son would want me to do party bags for his birthday, because he knows his friends would be expecting it and wouldn't want his party rated badly!

Hannahsbananas · 05/06/2023 18:00

originalglazedsingle · 05/06/2023 17:53

some people like to grow things, why is it a big deal? It's common enough.

Show quote history

It’s absolutely common, that’s the point. Most kids have grown stuff, (even if it was only some cress on a damp facecloth or a window box).
They’re hardly something new and innovative to be dispensed in a party bag?

ThanksItHasPockets · 05/06/2023 18:01

I can’t recall any parties where the children left completely empty-handed so I suppose it is quite unusual, but not necessarily rude. We’ve been to parties where we just left with a slice of cake which I don’t mind at all, especially as the party itself can be expensive. I did a craft party for DD a few years ago where the children all customised a plain t-shirt and took it home with them, so I suppose not a traditional party bag.

We did go to one party where a beautiful, enormous cake was produced with candles and sparklers, we all sang happy birthday, and then the cake was whisked away to be eaten at home and none was served to the children, either at the party or wrapped in the bags. I did think that was a bit mean!

Hugasauras · 05/06/2023 18:01

I mean, if plastic tat is your ojection then just, you know, don't put plastic tat in? There's loads of stuff that isn't plastic that is fun for party bags. We did little colouring books, some felt animal masks that all the kids were wearing on their way out of the door, a small pack of sweets, some seeds, and a couple of other bits.

Personally I love seeing how excited the kids are to get a party bag so I would always do one for that reason, and DD loves getting them, but I don't think anyone not doing them is rude. I'd just explain to DD that there wasn't one, I think she would be momentarily disappointed because she's 4 years old and they wear their emotions on their sleeves and every party we've been to up till now has had one, but she would quickly get over it!

DoingSomethingUnholy · 05/06/2023 18:01
Animated GIF

OMG won't somebody think of the children!!!

DollyTots · 05/06/2023 18:02

We didn’t do party bags at the end of our DD’s 6th birthday party. We’d had a sweet cart, which kids were free to take bags of as many sweets they could carry, temporary tattoos, Krispy Kreme doughnut wall and a fidget toy each for taking part in a party game. We didn’t do party bags because frankly, we believed they’d had enough? Amongst that and the bouncy castle, buffet, music, balloons - I have to admit I’d be a bit judgemental of a parent or child if they thought we were rude for not offering them a bag of toot at the end.

Lovetotravel123 · 05/06/2023 18:03

In my view it is rude to expect one. Children should be taught gratitude for the experience of the party rather than expecting a bag of tat.

Hannahsbananas · 05/06/2023 18:03

They would definitely rate the party down if they didn't get one. Not saying it would be a major issue, but it would be noted
Do you think the party mum should take this into consideration?
I doubt any hosts ask for feedback from your kids, or welcome it if given unsolicited.

Zarataralara · 05/06/2023 18:03

mushroommummy · 05/06/2023 16:34

Oh well looks like I have to rethink Fridays party with no party bags! I wasn’t going to give them out this year, plastic crap, credit crunch, very scaled back party.

Have a bowl filled with small chocolate bars, each child takes one as they leave. If you don’t want to do sugar have pencils, hair elastics if it’s all girls ( no idea what the boy equivalent would be) erasers.

sparklyIsPretty · 05/06/2023 18:04

Personally, I think the children will be disappointed not to get something at the end.

In all honesty most children look forward to getting a party bag.

originalglazedsingle · 05/06/2023 18:04

Hannahsbananas · 05/06/2023 18:00

It’s absolutely common, that’s the point. Most kids have grown stuff, (even if it was only some cress on a damp facecloth or a window box).
They’re hardly something new and innovative to be dispensed in a party bag?

Show quote history

why does it have to be new and innovative in the first place? Are you trying to become the Queen of Instagram mums or something?

Sweets, easter eggs, cake, a book are not new or innovative either? Some people don't like plastic, but the CHILD loves to hand out a small gift at the end of their own party.

Not everything has to be a competition,.

Thenewtrews · 05/06/2023 18:04

Ifeellikeateenageragain · 05/06/2023 17:53

Perfectly fine - in fact preferable. The majority of the party bags have plastic crap that most kids play with on the way home and then never again.

Definitely this. It’s just a waste of money

Lndnmummy · 05/06/2023 18:05

Not unusual. Where I am people are very anti plastic/tat and anti sweets. Bit tricky what to give the kids (flower seeds and a carrot is one I remember🤣)

People do things differently and according to their means. At 6, I would have thought your dc should know better/you be able to talk to them about expectations. Mine never said a word about nothing/carrots/whatever.

Mummyoflittledragon · 05/06/2023 18:05

It isn’t the norm and therefore goes against cultural expectations. I always bought a set of books and gave them out then changed to sweetie comes from about 7. If money wasn’t an issue, I’d think it an odd choice.

lucysnowe2 · 05/06/2023 18:05

Aw love party bags, it's a nice way to say 'thanks for coming' and for the birthday child to give presents as well as receive them :) I went a bit mad with them for DD's parties but was a bit more organised with DS - book/t shirt/colouring book etc plus sweets is usually pretty well regarded and not too steep.

EmeraldFox · 05/06/2023 18:06

Unusual to have nothing at all, such as a piece of cake, a balloon, book or bubbles

Allhailkingcharlie · 05/06/2023 18:06

I love getting the cake in party bags. The rest of the stuff is crap. But I'd miss the cake. Which my lovely children kindly give me