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Original poster

Pregnant at 43?!

317 replies

Stripypillow · 19/05/2023 10:44

I haven’t actually taken a test yet because I’m a bit scared to. Mostly because it would be an amazing but terrifying thing to be pregnant! I am 10 days late, and feel pregnant (headachey, sore boobs, sort of strange feeling that I had last time).

DH and I thought we couldn’t have another dc, we were told we had secondary infertility and conceiving naturally would be highly unlikely. DS is 10!

I know I might not even be pregnant. But if I am… anyone else had a baby at 43?! How did it go? I’m terrified for so many reasons! One that I’m not pregnant and have let myself fantasise about it for the last couple of days, another that I am and would miscarry because of my age, another that I am and would feel like an old mum…

I live in an area where women having babies in their 40s is normal. I have friends with babies and toddlers, so wouldn’t be completely left out.

Anyone had a baby at 43? How did it go?

OP posts:
Timesawastin · 19/05/2023 19:28

Stripypillow · 19/05/2023 12:08

This sounds probably a bit dramatic, but (assuming I am pregnant and all goes well) mainly I’m worried that if this DC has a baby at 43 also, I’ll be too old to be a helpful grandma! That sort of thing.

Show quote history

Gently, that's incredibly premature. I have two adult children neither of whom will reproduce.

Camillasfagwrinkles · 19/05/2023 19:31

I don't think OP will be back if it's negative.

RampantIvy · 19/05/2023 19:33

brogueish · 19/05/2023 12:02

I was 41 when I had my first and only. It all went incredibly smoothly (pregnany and labour). I do feel like an old mum now he's at school, but I don't think I actually do stick out that much. What are you worried about, that's age-related?

Are you me?
I didn't feel like an old mum though, as most other parents were well into their 30s when they had their babies.

@Stripypillow could you be perimenopausal? I remember going through a few pregnancy tests in my 40s when my periods became more spaces apart.

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Tessisme · 19/05/2023 19:39

Good luck OP! I had my first at 41, my second at 45. Two normal pregnancies - well in so far as there were no unusual circumstances - 'just' nausea, acid reflux and elephant feet! Two quick and straightforward deliveries. Two healthy boys. All good.

ThreeRingCircus · 19/05/2023 19:40

BriarHare · 19/05/2023 19:02

Do it! It’s either pregnancy or menopause! 😂

This, in a nutshell. I would just take the test in your position to know one way or the other (I understand you're hopeful and don't want that bubble bursting.) However perimenopause does often have very similar symptoms to early pregnancy. Fingers crossed you get the result you're hoping for.

Bellagio40 · 19/05/2023 19:41

I had my second at 42. He’s 18 now. No problems whatsoever.

Beach11 · 19/05/2023 19:48

Fingers crossed ❤️

justanothermummma · 19/05/2023 19:50

Oooh I'm excited to hear your news tomorrow! How lovely if you are!

dizzydizzydizzy · 19/05/2023 20:00

Ooh! Crossed fingers!

nunsflipflop · 19/05/2023 20:00

I am invested now. Good luck OP

purpledaisy60 · 19/05/2023 20:04

Good luck op!

supersop60 · 19/05/2023 20:10

I had Dd at nearly 41 and DS at 44. Pregnancy and birth were easy with DS (I did have amnio etc). They are 22 and 19 now. All fine.
I was older than other school mums but it didn't matter.

aw9870 · 19/05/2023 20:10

Good luck!🫶 wishing you all the best x

Jellycats4life · 19/05/2023 20:13

Don’t want to piss on your chips OP, but I’ve had quite a lot of late periods over the last six months and I’m your age. It’s perimenopause. Just trying to talk you down a bit! Sounds like you really want to be pregnant so: good luck.

Jesusmaryjosephandtheweedon · 19/05/2023 20:15

If you're 10 days late I don't think you need to wait for tomorrow's first wee. Should pick it up straight away. I only did one test first thing in the morning. My first pregnancy I tested at 8pm and then again at 9pm to be sure. Both very very positive

neveradullmoment99 · 19/05/2023 20:25

Goodluck OP. I had my last baby at 43! Hope you get the result you want :)
I am kind of excited for you! 'Goodluck !

neveradullmoment99 · 19/05/2023 20:26

Jesusmaryjosephandtheweedon · 19/05/2023 20:15

If you're 10 days late I don't think you need to wait for tomorrow's first wee. Should pick it up straight away. I only did one test first thing in the morning. My first pregnancy I tested at 8pm and then again at 9pm to be sure. Both very very positive

This definitely!

Impatientwino · 19/05/2023 20:28

I can't possible wait until the morning! YABU Smile

Just kidding but as a pp said at 10 days late there's no need to use morning wee it will be positive if you are pregnant.

Hoping you get the result you want Flowers

eatdrinkandbemerry · 19/05/2023 20:29

I had a baby at 21 then second at 30 and last at 41.
I'd say it hasn't been any harder third time around x

Makeadecisionalready · 19/05/2023 20:34

Good luck!!

RupertOscar1999 · 19/05/2023 20:39

I want to know if you're pregnant now :)
My fingers are crossed for you with whatever result you are wanting

HerbertChops · 19/05/2023 20:46

Good luck op! Two of my friends had babies last year, one aged just 46 and one just a few days before 47th birthday! Lovely baby girls, all doing well.

Nearamir · 19/05/2023 21:04

Good luck op, I hope you get the result you want 🤞

Original poster
Stripypillow · 19/05/2023 21:15

I’m back but sadly with not a very joyous reply. I bought the test, picked up DS from school, and somehow ended up in the park for HOURS while he was playing with friends. I felt very strange (like not entirely well), and desperate to get back.

Anyway I decided I’d test right away! No willpower to last until the morning at all! But decided to “check” one last time before I used the test. And sadly, tiny pink dots on my loo roll confirmed that I am not pregnant.

I haven’t felt this disappointed to get my period for years and years. We started trying for another baby 8.5 years ago now, and gave up hoping maybe 4 or 5 years ago. We were told ICSI was best shot, because it was an issue with DH’s sperm - and that we had been incredibly lucky, probably, to have had DS without intervention. We decided not to do ICSI because I didn’t want years of expensive, possibly intrusive heartache with no guarantee it would work - not knowing I was giving myself heartache either way.

In all those years, this is the latest my period has ever been (I am ridiculously regular usually) and the only time I’ve really felt “pregnant”!

But I am glad to have read all your brilliant stories. It would have been easy for people to come on and say “you’re too old”, I’m really grateful you didn’t and I read all that instead.

And I’m really touched that you were invested and keen to know! I’m sorry I didn’t come back with an exciting and hopeful update.

Time to work my way through all those old feelings again!

OP posts:
Pinkest · 19/05/2023 21:17

Love to you OP

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