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Would you let 8yo walk 0.3 miles part of school run on their own?

306 replies

SchoolRunQ · 15/05/2023 10:15

I'm contemplating changing my work hours that will mean one day a week I won't be around for the school dropoff. We have two children that go to separate schools so DH and I usually take one each. There aren't any other parents that go from where we are to school to team up with.

So one day a week DH will be doing drop off for both and to minimise walking distance for the smallest one, planning to drop off DD age 8 (and a half!) on the pavement where she will have to walk 0.3 miles (about 6 mins) straight up that pavement then will arrive at the school. No crossing involved. We currently leave her further up that road anyway to walk the last few metres alone (there is a steady stream of kids and parents going the same way). She's bright and sensible but can be oblivious to surroundings so that's why I wanted to gauge opinion! It's a 20mph road with some traffic but never fast as there are traffic queues at the end of the road.

Don't know if I'm being overly precious even questioning this - she's my first child so not left them alone to walk anywhere before but might be good to start building a little bit of independence!

OP posts:
KCIII · 16/05/2023 18:31

CM1897 · 16/05/2023 13:27

The school can argue that the child could be at risk though, and they don’t want to be apart of that risk. Could result in a social care referral if you don’t pick your child up

Is this a joke - you think a parent who has planned and prepared for their NT child to walk a 6 minute journey would result in a social care referral? Can you elaborate as that’s very much not my experience.

I’m a school governor and can tell you that we have children at significant risk who can barely get referrals to social services and those who have, teachers spend a chunk of their time chasing up when statutory guidance is breached.

wistfullyfocused · 16/05/2023 18:52

KCIII · 16/05/2023 18:31

Is this a joke - you think a parent who has planned and prepared for their NT child to walk a 6 minute journey would result in a social care referral? Can you elaborate as that’s very much not my experience.

I’m a school governor and can tell you that we have children at significant risk who can barely get referrals to social services and those who have, teachers spend a chunk of their time chasing up when statutory guidance is breached.

Exactly. Total rubbish dreamt up behind a keyboard!

MemoryOfAFish · 16/05/2023 19:32

Are they in y3 or y4? Do they walk with other children in their class?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

MrsMiddleMother · 16/05/2023 19:39

Personally I wouldn't be comfortable with it. I'd put one of the children in breakfast club, I can't imagine 6 minutes of extra walking would make much difference to the journey for youngest.

theremaybetulipsahead · 16/05/2023 19:57

In your circumstances I would do this.

In my area, almost every house has a driveway and it is that which would concern me. Some drivers pull in/out too quickly and without due care. My DC was almost hit by a driver pulling in very quickly without looking, in retrospect I wish I had spoken to them, although probably would make no difference to how they drive.

ArdeteiMasazxu · 16/05/2023 20:00

If there's no roads to cross then I would think that's ok from age 9. Age 8 feels a bit young, and school may raise it as a safeguarding concern if a child that young is arriving alone.

rebekahnorris · 16/05/2023 20:19

No cos I'm always scared of potential pedophiles 😬

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 06:29

No I would not. Also, my children’s school don’t allow anyone younger than year 5 arrive to school alone. It’s not safe. 8 is so young!!!

KCIII · 17/05/2023 06:47

It’s not safe in your opinion. That is not a statement of fact as all circumstances are different.

redskylight · 17/05/2023 07:31

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 06:29

No I would not. Also, my children’s school don’t allow anyone younger than year 5 arrive to school alone. It’s not safe. 8 is so young!!!

So if a child arrived on their own at your school (how would they know?) they would refuse to let the child in? Doubt it somehow.

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 07:32

redskylight · 17/05/2023 07:31

So if a child arrived on their own at your school (how would they know?) they would refuse to let the child in? Doubt it somehow.

Of course they would not refuse to let the child in 😂 but the parents would be challenged at the first opportunity, usually with a phone call. At my children’s school the headteacher and deputy head greet the children coming in at the gates in the morning, so it would be clear to see which children are alone.

redskylight · 17/05/2023 07:37

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 07:32

Of course they would not refuse to let the child in 😂 but the parents would be challenged at the first opportunity, usually with a phone call. At my children’s school the headteacher and deputy head greet the children coming in at the gates in the morning, so it would be clear to see which children are alone.

Phone call:

<head> noticed that your DC is arriving at school on their own; is everything ok?
<parent> oh yes, we just drop them off a few minutes up the road to make it easier to get other DC to their school
<head> ???? reports them to social services? resolves to keep a quiet eye on whether DC arrives safely? does nothing else?

a school can't "not allow" something that happens outside the school gates.

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 07:44

redskylight · 17/05/2023 07:37

Phone call:

<head> noticed that your DC is arriving at school on their own; is everything ok?
<parent> oh yes, we just drop them off a few minutes up the road to make it easier to get other DC to their school
<head> ???? reports them to social services? resolves to keep a quiet eye on whether DC arrives safely? does nothing else?

a school can't "not allow" something that happens outside the school gates.

You don’t know much about safeguarding and you’re being extremely defensive 🤣

CeliaNorth · 17/05/2023 07:55

No cos I'm always scared of potential pedophiles 😬Children

For everyone who says they wouldn't do this -

Do you or will you allow your children to have a phone or other device? Do you or will you supervise them every minute they are using them, until they're sixteen? Do you or will you remove access overnight?

Children are more likely to be at risk of harm at home alone in their own bedrooms.

redskylight · 17/05/2023 08:45

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 07:44

You don’t know much about safeguarding and you’re being extremely defensive 🤣

Actually I do know quite a lot about safeguarding and I didn't think I was getting defensive.

Safeguarding is considered on a case by case basis. There might be instances where walking a short distance to school once a week would be considered to be a risk, and the school would evaluate this. Perhaps if the walk involved crossing a busy dual carriageway, for example. But I would suggest it's highly unlikely here, in the absence of any other indicators to flag a safeguarding concern.

The very many posters on this thread who say that many children routinely do this at very many schools should indicate that it's not routinely a safeguarding issue. Or do you think that they are all getting it wrong?

MrsMeanwhile · 17/05/2023 09:09

At our school, there is an expectation that parents will walk the children to and from school until year 5 when parents have the option of filling in a form to say they allow school to release children without a parent present. I think year 5 is a good age and I like this school rule.

MidnightEagle · 17/05/2023 12:05

I wouldn't be comfortable with that for my 8 year old

mixedrecycling · 17/05/2023 12:23

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 07:44

You don’t know much about safeguarding and you’re being extremely defensive 🤣

Safeguarding is about identifying and managing risk, not preventing all and any risk. And that is specific to each situation and the people (children) involved.

DD had some mental health issues which resulted in an A&E visit, which triggered a referral to Social Services safeguarding team. They queried a long-ish journey she was making on her own on a regular basis.

I explained that I had gone with her until she knew the route, then we had a phased period of me going part of the way. That we had planned for various eventualities, and discussed keeping safe. Although it was quite a long solo journey for her age, they had no safeguarding concerns because I had taken a considered decision about it, involved DD in the decision, had planned it, had considered the risks and mitigated the risks. Then, as a parent, I had every right to make a decision about what was right for my child.

If I had simply left DD to go from point A to point B because I was careless about her safety, that might have been a safeguarding issue.

Equally, it could be a safeguarding issue if an older child did exactly the same journey solo, because they did not have the skills to manage it.

There is no blanket age-related ban on solo journeys for a child.

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 12:36

mixedrecycling · 17/05/2023 12:23

Safeguarding is about identifying and managing risk, not preventing all and any risk. And that is specific to each situation and the people (children) involved.

DD had some mental health issues which resulted in an A&E visit, which triggered a referral to Social Services safeguarding team. They queried a long-ish journey she was making on her own on a regular basis.

I explained that I had gone with her until she knew the route, then we had a phased period of me going part of the way. That we had planned for various eventualities, and discussed keeping safe. Although it was quite a long solo journey for her age, they had no safeguarding concerns because I had taken a considered decision about it, involved DD in the decision, had planned it, had considered the risks and mitigated the risks. Then, as a parent, I had every right to make a decision about what was right for my child.

If I had simply left DD to go from point A to point B because I was careless about her safety, that might have been a safeguarding issue.

Equally, it could be a safeguarding issue if an older child did exactly the same journey solo, because they did not have the skills to manage it.

There is no blanket age-related ban on solo journeys for a child.

8 year old children should not be taking solo journeys.

Sadly there are opportunists everywhere. I work with sex offenders and have done for over ten years.

If you allow your 8 year old to be entirely alone out in public and something terrible happens to them, you would not only blame the perpetrators but you would also blame yourself and you know it.

Better to be safe than sorry when they are so young.

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 12:37

CeliaNorth · 17/05/2023 07:55

No cos I'm always scared of potential pedophiles 😬Children

For everyone who says they wouldn't do this -

Do you or will you allow your children to have a phone or other device? Do you or will you supervise them every minute they are using them, until they're sixteen? Do you or will you remove access overnight?

Children are more likely to be at risk of harm at home alone in their own bedrooms.

I would not let my 8 year old have a phone, no!

Dodgeitornot · 17/05/2023 12:47

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 12:36

8 year old children should not be taking solo journeys.

Sadly there are opportunists everywhere. I work with sex offenders and have done for over ten years.

If you allow your 8 year old to be entirely alone out in public and something terrible happens to them, you would not only blame the perpetrators but you would also blame yourself and you know it.

Better to be safe than sorry when they are so young.

Opportunists don't discriminate by age. All the women getting murdered and raped are proof of that, no?
If you think 8.5 is too young to make a 6min walk down a safe road alone, that's fine, but don't spread your scaremongering.
Don't victim blame either. An 8.5 year old should be perfectly ok going down said safe road for 6mins alone. It is nobody's fault but the perpetrators if anything was to happen to them. What sick victim blaming argument are you going to come up with next.

PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 17/05/2023 12:50

A voice of reason @Dodgeitornot plus the biggest risk to a 8.5 year old girl is her father/step father/uncle/grandparent/cousin people spend too long worrying about the wrong things.

Dodgeitornot · 17/05/2023 13:07

PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 17/05/2023 12:50

A voice of reason @Dodgeitornot plus the biggest risk to a 8.5 year old girl is her father/step father/uncle/grandparent/cousin people spend too long worrying about the wrong things.

Exactly. It is vanishingly rare to be snatched by someone. It is not just lack of independent play and travel that's hurting kids, but this level of anxiety being passed down to them, making them believe the world is a far more dangerous place than it really is.
I hope some of the posters on here seriously consider seeking help for their anxiety, as, aside from the car backing out if the driveway and not seeing a child, none of these worries are rational.

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 13:13

PaddingtonTheAngelofDeath · 17/05/2023 12:50

A voice of reason @Dodgeitornot plus the biggest risk to a 8.5 year old girl is her father/step father/uncle/grandparent/cousin people spend too long worrying about the wrong things.

Okay, so if you ensure your child isn’t at risk from a dodgy aunt or uncle then hooray! No qualms to send them packing and walk almost half a mile alone down the road aged 8!

Utterly irresponsible madness.

Worcestershirem0mmy · 17/05/2023 13:16

Also, may I add that the original poster has admitted her child is oblivious to her surroundings 😂

Does that sound safe or does that sound irresponsible? Can your husband not drive an extra 0.3 miles to ensure your child gets there safely?

It is just ridiculous.

Your child’s safety comes before convenience.