Would you let 8yo walk 0.3 miles part of school run on their own?

[SchoolRunQ]

I'm contemplating changing my work hours that will mean one day a week I won't be around for the school dropoff. We have two children that go to separate schools so DH and I usually take one each. There aren't any other parents that go from where we are to school to team up with.

So one day a week DH will be doing drop off for both and to minimise walking distance for the smallest one, planning to drop off DD age 8 (and a half!) on the pavement where she will have to walk 0.3 miles (about 6 mins) straight up that pavement then will arrive at the school. No crossing involved. We currently leave her further up that road anyway to walk the last few metres alone (there is a steady stream of kids and parents going the same way). She's bright and sensible but can be oblivious to surroundings so that's why I wanted to gauge opinion! It's a 20mph road with some traffic but never fast as there are traffic queues at the end of the road.

Don't know if I'm being overly precious even questioning this - she's my first child so not left them alone to walk anywhere before but might be good to start building a little bit of independence!

London primary here too, walking from Y3/4 is normal, from what I see (other children in uniform) its fairly normal at the other local primary schools as well. My son is starting to walk on his own in September when he is in year 4, a few of his classmates are walking already.

But they're not 'magically expected to become adults' at 14.

The people who wouldn't ever let an 8 YO walk 5 minutes to school will be the same ones still driving them there at 15, and then meddling in their university applications, telling them where to go, what to study and calling the university on their behalf to sort out every last problem that the young adult should be dealing with themselves but can't because their parents have never let them out of their sight before.

I used to go home from school alone when I was 5. 15 minute walk across the village. I think an 8 year old should be able to handle 0.3 miles - but you know your child best.

I agree with @Amumo. we live in Switzerland and kids are expected to start to walk to school alone from the first year of kindergarten (they start the summer after their 4th birthday). In the second week of kindergarten the police come and teach the children how to cross the road safely at the crossing And they are given a high via vest at their settling in day that they must wear on their way to and from school. There are plenty of reasons why this is a good idea:
it gives them an adult free space to learn social skills
it teaches them problem solving skills
they can learn through their mistakes (DS and his friend decided to play before school once and we’re late, he hasn’t done it again)
it builds confidence etc etc

We are just starting to build on walking home from after school club now it’s lighter in the evenings (DS just turned 5 last week). DH phones when he’s on the bus home from work and DS meets him at the bus stop. Last week he got there before the bus and needed a wee. He went behind the bus stop and had a wee in the grass and then sat and chatted to a woman who was waiting to get on the bus.

he wasn’t scared or traumatized that his dad wasn’t waiting for him, he solved his own problems and came home and proudly told me all about it. (NT) Children are much more capable than we give them credit for and it builds them when we give them the chance to be independent.

DD is 8 and I would not let her walk that alone once, never mind daily. I think people forget that times are not like they used to be when we were kids. There’s many more people in the UK than there used to be 25/30 years ago and with more people you get more predators (plus I personally think the internet has influenced the increase in crimes against children but that's just my personal opinion)

Whilst times are not like they were 25/30 years ago, we also haven't yet reached a stage where primary school children are being targeted by predators during a short walk, just outside their school, with lots of other parents and children about. Your attitude is not proportionate.
The most likely things to happen to the DC is along the list of things provided up thread (stepping in dog mess; realising they've forgotten something) - some of which might be difficult for an 8 year old to cope with for the first time, but none of which constitute a real point of danger.

For those who think 8 is too young for this - I'd be interested to hear what age you think is appropriate? I think it's generally accepted that secondary school age i.e. 11 is appropriate for a child to make their own way to school. This might involve some combination of walking/bus/train depending on where you live. What are the intermediary steps between few minutes on straight road at 8 is too much but it's fine for an 11 year old to do that journey on their own?

i dont see how hard it is to arrange for her to walk with a friend, or at least go with a friend somehow.

I used to get dropped off from 9 years old at a side road so I just had to walk up the side road and then along the main road, no crossing any roads. There were always other kids and parents around so I was rarely ‘on my own’.
I think it’s absolutely fine.

No one has been able to answer this for me and I've asked a few times.

This ^^

If you think 8.5 is too young to walk alone for 6 mins on a safe road, you are projecting your anxieties about to world onto your child. There is a very big link in negative childhood experiences and what we allow our kids to do. We are currently obsessed with babying children and calling it safeguarding.
You have to think hard as to why you think your 8 year old wouldn't be able to walk 300m on a safe straight road. Are they genuinely not able, or are you just worried something might happen? That something is very likely to be something they can deal with and dealing with is alone would boost their confidence tenfold. More than any screen time, views on their videos or clubs they take part in. Figuring out a problem alone tells the child wow I can do this. Watching Peppa Pig and Bing doesn't mean a child can't walk.
The benefits of this sort of thing on a child far outweigh any possible negatives. Studies I posted about this a couple of pages back are clear.

I don't think 8 is absolutely too young, it depends on the child and the route.

But it's earlier than I plan to. For me, my plan with my DS (6) is to get him to start walking to school when he is 9, then add in walking home when he is 10 and then give him keys from 11.

That's just my (subjective) judgement of when I think he will be ready based on his personality and our route to school. It's a very short walk (0.1 miles) but does involve crossing a road and the road has two hostels for people recovering from substance abuse problems so occasionally there are incidents that I would be cautious about DS seeing or handling on his own. E.g. a few months ago a man was stabbed and the helicopter (not sure if police or ambulance) used the school playing fields to land and so school opening was delayed.

Everyone is going to make their own judgements, I am sure some of you will think I am very lax with this plan and others that I am a helicopter parent but that's life

@Theelephantinthecastle I think your plan sounds very reasonable.

Here school would almost certainly see it as safeguarding before year 5 unfortunately. What ever your risk assessment is. so check with them.

as regards not cotton wooling etc we somehow managed to raujsed fully independent 18yr olds , despite them not walking to school alone till 10- but we put a lot of prep into walking / using public transport together before that age. Son was using the train alone straight after school in year 6 for instance .

Read the thread.

The school would not 'almost certainly see it as a safeguarding issue' given that there's plenty of schools who are fine with yr3 walking to and from school by themselves. My son's included.

They can see it as whatever they like. What does 'see it as safeguarding' mean anyway? The word if so overused it's not even used correctly. That makes no sense.
The school can very well have a safeguarding concern regarding a pupil. They can speak to a parent and make a referral to SS who will investigate. There is no law around this. The parents responsibility is to make the judgement. SS will take more issue with a Y5 latchkey kid staying home alone for hours, than a Y3 walking home for 6 mins.

How would the school even know how the child had got to school? 8 year olds are not quizzed on exactly how they got to school, did mummy walk them to the gate, did they have their hand held as they crossed the road. and this seems much safer than the parents who let their 4 years old scoot ahead of them with no ability to avoid people walking in the opposite direction which schools also don't have a problem with .

@redskylight Yes to the 4 year olds on scooters! It's so scary.

I don't understand all the posters on this site who think caring about a young child's safety is damaging.

I didn't allow one DC to even wait for the school bus without me til he was 10 because I wanted to see him get on the bus with my own eyes. By 12 he was getting public transport everywhere himself.

Strangely enough my younger son who was allowed to go to the bus stop without me from age 8 as his older brother was there (so they basically started doing it at the same time), does not like travelling himself even at 13.

I really don't understand the post saying it's bad for children to 'throw everything at them' age 11, while simultaneously saying it'll be scary at first for the 8 year old? It has the possibility to be 'scary' at any age but an older child is far more equipt to deal with the situation.

I personally would not although I see others letting their young children walk themselves. I would need to know they got safely inside the building.

It probably won't be scary to the 8 year old, especially if it's a route she's walked accompanied many times before and it's presented to her as not a huge deal, as something her parents are confident she is capable of.

It's almost certainly going to be scarier for her parents, but those fears don't last too long once you see your child handling it all well. Most children are a lot more sensible and resourceful when they're alone than when they are being looked after - having mum and dad there taking responsibility for them does actually change their behaviour. They are also a lot more sensible and resourceful than they are usually given credit for.

@Aaaaandbreathe I don't understand how letting an 8.5 year old walk 300m alone on a safe road equals not caring about their safety.
The only reason we believe older children are more equipped is because they've had more experience. Historically by age 11, a child would've had much more experience of independent travel than kids do now.

It makes no sense to say that it's better to give them independence at 8 rather than 11 because at 11 they'll be terrified because they've never done it before...but at 8 they'll be fine despite also never doing it before.

I also don't think parents taking their kids to school is causing mental health problems. I think there are many other factors at play there.

I am probably an over protective parent by some of the standards shown on this thread but I'm quite happy to be one. My DC are precious and irreplaceable...never forget there are people in our society who would do all sorts of hideous evil things to children given half a chance. That's on top of the people who are just general selfish idiots and drive like lunatics etc. Personally I'd rather err on the side of caution and operate on a worst case scenario basis.

How times change when I was younger parents walked kids to school on first day of infants and they generally walked themselves afterwards. Talking 5 year olds. Yet by the time my son was in primary they didn't even let kids walk to school gate to meet parents there and had to be collected from classroom. And this was nearly 11 year olds

No I wouldn't. I'd find a different solution. At 10 yes but not at 8. Does she have a phone? If something did go wrong what would she do? If she was approached by a strange man how would she react? She's just too small. If you do go ahead I'd at least put an Apple air tag in her bag or an Apple Watch on her. The chances are low but the consequences are catastrophic if she was assaulted or worse.

Yes, my DS started walking to school from that age.
We live 700m walk to school, I started taking him halfway, then to the traffic lights, then he didn't want me to come along anymore.

If she is happy and comfortable doing it, then encourage her, the responsibility is good for building their confidence and self esteem.