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Original poster

Who/ what do you want to fuck the fuck off?

172 replies

Crustsamongus · 13/05/2023 12:16

I have raging PMS and am exhausted by work. I just want everyone to fuck off and leave me the fuck alone! Special mention to: year 8, GCSE exams and my toddler who is permanently miserable because he doesn't understand he just needs to go to and stay the fuck asleep! In-laws have just arrived and I just CBA to be sociable. Hiding and crying in the bedroom as I hate being like this but can't help it.

OP posts:
LassoOfTruth · 14/05/2023 13:44

Head lice. We’ve had them several times this term and my poor 5 year old has log curly hair… just fuck off beasties! It’s costing me a fortune to nuke them every couple of weeks because apparently some parents don’t bother

IHeartGeneHunt · 14/05/2023 13:50

My phytophotodermatitis, which I've got from kneeling on hogweed, and feels like I've been done over by a Rotavator.

Sunflowers80 · 14/05/2023 13:52

This lying corrupt Government who want more and more control and have forgotten they work for us. And no Labour Keir starmer is another dangerous extremely silly 'woke'lunatic who wants control.

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Heresme33 · 14/05/2023 13:58

Reality shows on tv biggest load of rubbish.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 14/05/2023 14:01

CoffeeBeansGalore · 13/05/2023 14:45

DH's "friend" who has been staying with us for the last 5 weeks due to acrimonious split with his wife. Just waiting for the keys for his new house. Can't come quick enough.

He needs to f off to the far side of f and when he gets there, f off a bit more.

Selfish, inconsiderate & so tight he should squeak when he walks. I knew he was "careful" but didn't realise just how scrooge-like he is. The lack of self awareness is untrue. He sits on my sofa all evening farting & thinks it's funny. I don't like his wife but actually feel sorry for her now I've experienced living with him.

We haven't had an entire evening to ourselves since he's been here. Announced one evening he was getting an early night to leave us in peace - at 9pm 🙄.

Said I should be grateful that he went out whilst I had a girly afternoon with my (adult) daughters. In MY home!!!

Even dh has had enough now but says we can't just kick him out. (Why not??? Apparently Diddums has nowhere else to go & he's a mate 🙄).

If he doesn't leave soon I may need volunteers to help with a new patio and an alibi . . .

I am 100% sure you were staying with me at the time, @CoffeeBeansGalore. Wink

Long covid can fuck off.
Being exhausted all the time can fuck off.
Colitis can fuck off - especially as it flares up if I eat too much raw veg, so I can’t pack my diet with salads in hopes of losing some weight, without being plagued with awful cramps and the runs.

mastertomsmum · 14/05/2023 14:04

The Tories
Self promoting bores in the entertainment world

Daffodilsandtuplips · 14/05/2023 14:07

RaraRachael · 13/05/2023 13:18

Our horrible neighbours. They have bern horrible to every member of mg family including the cat. They've sold their house but despite saying they're going "in a couple of weeks they're still here.
To make it worse they're going around telling anybody who will listen that they're having to move because the neighbours are horrible to them

Jusf fuck the fuck right off you lying horrible deluded pair of wankers.

My neighbours weren’t quite that bad but they did have their moments. It’s fucking wonderful now they’ve gone.

Bargellobitch · 14/05/2023 14:10

My sister's soon to be ex husband. She is trying to separate from him and he's a massive dick. I wish he'd just fuck off.

PuppyMonkey · 14/05/2023 14:11

The GCSEs that are starting tomorrow can do the biggest fucking off ever imagined as far as I’m concerned.

Brumbies · 14/05/2023 14:19

The government for allowing an invasion of our shores.

BeefPho · 14/05/2023 15:11

My soon to be ex husband who won't sign the divorce papers because he always has to be in control can fuck off.

ipswichwitch · 14/05/2023 16:11

SATS
the OCD that’s stopping DS from doing even basic things today (like eating and drinking)
work
being skint
menopause
hayfever
the arseholes that insist on lighting fires round here the second the sun makes an appearance
CoffeeBeansGalore I’ll help you dig that patio and provide a convincing alibi so long as we make it big enough to fit all the above under too!!!

ipswichwitch · 14/05/2023 16:12

Maybe we could channel Strangers on a Train and rid each other of the things we want to fuck off, then nobody will suspect a thing….

tailinthejam · 14/05/2023 16:17

Right this moment, after having spent almost the entire day pulling the bastard stuff out of my front garden, - wild oats.

Spanielsarepainless · 14/05/2023 16:27

My adult stepdaughter for accusing me of something when it was her father who did it. We get on OK for months then she does this. Again and again. It's as if she can't believe we are almost friendly. The words "Sorry, I got that wrong" don't occur in her vocabulary. This time she can damn well apologise.

thebear1 · 14/05/2023 16:38

The summer cold I have and never ending wait to find out something that will happen at work which means a big life change for me.

Thequeenofwishfulthinking · 14/05/2023 17:55

I’ve a different one to yesterday. Today it’s my sons dads ex who he has a child with (ds’s brother) She’s so pushy and thinks only her child matters. She wants to be a tight little family of three without DS (even though she pretends otherwise.) Fuck the fuck off back to your home town! You aren’t the Queen of Sheba woman.

Thequeenofwishfulthinking · 14/05/2023 18:35

Beef pho I got mine personally served on my ex husband. A process server did it outside his work. It cost £60. This was a few years ago so it might be more expensive. The process server timed it perfectly. Ex husband had an affair with his boss at work. As his shift finished and a lot of staff were all leaving at the same time the process server walked up to him asked him if he X X - he said yes. The process server said Your served mate and off he walked.

crew2022 · 14/05/2023 20:05

My mums dementia so I can actually have a conversation with my last surviving relative.
My GP reception team who are incompetent
The electrician who badly wired our kitchen and fitted crooked sockets
All the bad tradesmen we have ever had

JanesSadLittleLife · 14/05/2023 20:26

You know when you've spent years and years being benevolent, understanding, generous with your heart and money, trustworthy and emotionally available at all times, only to be endlessly dismissed, ignored and taken for granted? That, that can fuck all the way off. I'm so done with the lot of them.

Twospaniels · 14/05/2023 20:40

Chris Packham
je’s done more to damage nature than anyone else

KirstenBlest · 14/05/2023 20:44

@Twospaniels , has he? How?
He gives me the creeps

CrazyCatLady13 · 14/05/2023 20:50

squashyhat · 13/05/2023 12:59

The unexplained pain in my lower left abdomen that has been subjected to every test known to humankind and still defies explanation. It's always just bloody THERE and it's really pissing me off.

Have you been to a pain management clinic? Your GP can refer you. I got diagnosed with a trapped nerve in my lower left side after a year of different tests. It took the pain consultant 5 minutes to diagnose & it's now being treated with injections.

MathiasBroucek · 14/05/2023 20:52

“Support” functions at work (HR, finance, legal, marketing) who create extra work for client-facing people

flowertoday · 14/05/2023 20:56

My sibling's horrible partner who is preying on my elderly parents . I wish he would do one.

All of the nasty pathetic cretinous men who have hurt and damages female members of my family. Rapes, assault, abuse, coercion and manipulation. I know some lovely men, but my god I am sick of many of the specimens I have come across.

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