Mumsnet “norms” that annoy you most

[usernamechanged1]

For me it’s the utterly obscure baby names. We’ve all seen them and I’m quite sure nobody uses them in real life. Yet on MN, it’s apparently standard.

Honourable mention to the 50% of posters whose husbands are earning upwards of £100K too.

I ❤️JKR

Sex is binary.

Still Spartacus.

A&E NOW often 3 days after OP posted but you are only allowed to go when your head fallen off/ multiple limbs are missing and besides you can’t be that bad if you can still type…

This one is so vile!

Calling any casual dalliance or indeed distant past one night stands or anyone at all you aren't married to 'Partner'. I have never heard this outside Mumsnet. Just an awful cliche.

People who want to work through their husband cheating on them and ask for advice on getting over it

1 chicken should feed 600 people

If your Rupert or Annabelle didn’t go to a ‘Ultra super selective independent grammar’ then life is over.

The constant mention of Russell Group Uni’s

Any type of bad or rude behaviour - of course they must be assessed for ADHD, ASD, dementia, depression etc etc.

If you don’t live in London, then you live in a City or Town with nothing going for it - no theatres, culture etc.

The absolute belief that you are some how superior if you don’t waste your time ironing clothes. (You still look creased)

If you believe that women only spaces should exist and men should not participate in women’s sport nor be able to access women’s spaces in prisons or refuges, then you are automatically deemed to be a hateful transphobe.

That’s the one. I’ve seen it quite a lot though.

Crazy fuckers on here. 😂

Everyone has ADHD.

Also, MNers love WFH because it means they don’t have to interact with their colleagues (who they don’t like) and they avoid the school run because they have to interact with school mums (don’t like them either) and they don’t answer to the door to their neighbours (also don’t like) and have gone NC with their family (hate them). It must be very lonely!!

Not seen it in while but when someone is feeling down about something or having relationship issues etc and some comments something along the lines of go and book a spa day.

Not once have I ever done that or no anybody who has done it.

I literally couldn't give a flying fuck if I look creased! I would rather that than look like I iron 😁

When posters put dcat or ddog. Just fucking put cat or dog you twit!

The always having a completely sober adult in the house at all times to drive the kids to hospital.

The constant threat of fire the minute you leave the room.

‘What does [quiet carriage; insert thing of your choice] mean???’. You are wandering into a conversation and don’t even know what the topic means. Look it up. Select the text on your device, do a web search. It’s so feeble.

Going to great lengths to put an outfit together for the school run.

You forgot the hollow legged kids so skinny you can see their ribs (always have to say you can see their ribs) who can put away ten tonnes of food per day. Plus obviously the ‘tall, strapping’ teen boys who eat a loaf of bread with every meal. And they play rugby too!

All the daughters are 'willowy' as well.

DH has every fault under the sun. List of awful things. Please don't suggest LTB as he is a lovely man really.

That people in “normal” relationships NEVER argue or shout at each other, EVER, and if it does ever happen, it’s obviously the worst relationship in the world and bastards must be left immediately.

All DH’s are 6’3

All of it really, I find it hugely entertaining and take a lot of it with a big pinch of salt. In real life I don't know anyone who lives in a very expensive house, earns a massive salary, is opposed to trans rights, or has a cleaner or a nanny. I try to picture a typical Mumsnet person, I imagine her dressed in Boden, living in at least a 4 bed detached house with en-suite, but still feeling hard done to because she is not in a 5 bed with a swimming pool and wearing Pret a Porter. Took me a while to get my head around the abbreviations and some of them still puzzle me. I wasn't on here during Covid but I bet it was wild!

The inability to understand why other people like things you don’t. Bags, shoes, cats, Pandora, hummus, etc… AIBU to not understand why people like…? Yes! Yes, you bloody are!!

Just move. Like moving isn’t expensive.

Spa day. My idea of torture.

Any badly behaved child must have [insert diagnosis]. They couldn't just be throwing a tantrum.

No one must ever go to A&E unless they are already dead. Alternatively, go to A&E for a mild headache because GPs are always wrong.

Anything over 8 or 9 stone is overweight. Posters feeling 'grossly overweight' at normal BMIs. Anyone eating a normal amount of food is a glutton and on the path towards needing bariatric surgery. Teenagers secretly eating chocolate must have binge eating disorder.

Everyone can access mental health services and they're always effective.

DHs are always extremely handsome and look like [insert famous actor]. DC are slim, beautiful and always play sport. Unless they are - heaven forbid - a bit pudgy and unathletic.

Everything is better run in Europe and Europeans are far more stylish than us déclassé Brits [probably true but we don't need to be reminded every five minutes].

😂

yes - about 4% of the population do.

80% of MNers do ( the remaining 20% live on a tenner a week)

Those eating ones where they eat practically nothing all day. So weird.

And when you make comment like above and posters gleefully come into the thread teeth gnashing and foaming , their keyboard on fire to pull you up on something / anything that’s not quite right. It’s like they are poised for the kill, hovering waiting for an innocent to slip up in any way. Make my day bitch , here I come 😡

I don't know why but when people respond to another reply 'this' or 'this in spades'. It really irks me