Mumsnet “norms” that annoy you most

[usernamechanged1]

For me it’s the utterly obscure baby names. We’ve all seen them and I’m quite sure nobody uses them in real life. Yet on MN, it’s apparently standard.

Honourable mention to the 50% of posters whose husbands are earning upwards of £100K too.

Kicking kids out as soon as they turn 18
Disowining elderly relatives
Falling out with neighbours
Falling our with work colleagues
Hating your in laws
Assuming everyone lives in a massive house with multiple bedrooms so can easily take in a lodger or an au pair to solve childcare issues.
Thinking everyone bigger than a Size eight is morbidly obese

One that stopped being funny a long time ago.

The culture braggers with their homes ‘overflowing with ‘thousands of well loved books that they couldn’t bear to part with’ and ‘original artwork’.

Wedding attire, wearing a LBD to a wedding isn’t that bad. MN would have every guest in Jaques Vert.

When the poster thinks they have been taken advantage of (often possible misunderstandings) and lots of advice given to a take strong form of revenge and seriously escalate the situation rather than just trying to have a discussion first

That a man who works less than full time is a cocklodger but a woman who has done the same is entirely blameless because 'she gave up her earning power for the kiddies' boak

The idea that grandparents shouldn't be expected to help out at all, 'they've had their kids, childcare is your sole responsibility, they owe you nothing' attitude - in normal families, grandparents help out and it's not weird to expect a bit of babysitting from your own mum and dad!

Also the hatred for sahm, but as soon as there's a childcare emergency MN says to ask a sahm to help you out. Er, nope.

The desperate need to prove how nice you are to people in the service industry. Dare to criticise bad service on MN and someone will inevitably pop up with “Could you be any more entitled? You do realise they’re probably on minimum wage?” I swear if someone started a thread saying a waitress had shit in their dinner, there would be at least one reply of “Well how do you know she doesn’t have IBS? Waiting staff are people, you know. Maybe if customers like you left better tips she’d be able to afford a pay toilet”.

It’s the same with cleaners. Anyone who has a cleaner will desperately try to justify it by repeatedly referring to “my lovely cleaner” (they’re always lovely) and pointing out that they pay them more per hour than they earn themselves and give them holiday and sick pay. Yet if anyone dares to refer to a cleaner as their employee, someone will pop up to say “Oh, so you pay National Insurance and contribute to a pension for them, do you?”

That's another thing - the faux outrage/ignorance at the idea that there might be people out there who don’t religiously follow the law or other regulations to the letter. “You say you paid your friend’s brother with a van to help you move? Why did you pay in cash - what is he trying to hide? Has he even filed a tax return?”

I don't see it very much anymore but:

"Nethuns is that way >>".

That used to piss me right off.

Now it's:

"Studies show that putting your child into early years childcare is absolutely detrimental to the child's mental health and why would I want a stranger raising my child".

Still yet to see evidence.
Fuck. Off.

@Myneighbourskia

Oh yeah.

The mn double standard

It's OK for women not to work but never men

I

If you can find it, there’s a brilliant thread about a woman whose husband was surprised she still wanted to cook a roast in the evening despite having lunch in Morrisons cafe (where they’d presumably bought all food for said roast). OP had had a jacket potato.

One poster got very aerated about how strange it was for OP to cook a roast when she’d already had “a treat lunch”. Like it was the sodding Ivy.

@cannaecookrisotto

That's another 1.

I wanted to raise my child myself

What, like children of working parents are raised by wolves?

Might as well say I love my kids more than you.

(Have actually seen that!)

Yes, a lot of Gender Critical women have hate speech directed at them.

My husband doesn't want sex with me, I'm sad
Google death grip

My wife doesn't want sex with me, I'm sad
Do you hoOvEr and share the MENTAL LOAD of LIFE ADMIN

Life admin!

Had never heard pf that pre mn but now I know it should be taking approx 700 hours a week.

I think I must have a life admin fairy doing 699.9 hours of mine

Well you need a day off each week with no interruptions to do such strenuous tasks as ‘paying bills’ and ‘booking dentist appointments.’

I take your Life admin and give you "adulting" 😶

I mean where did this word even come from! It's bloody dreadful!

The other one that irritated my briefly, was on the Royal family topic.
Not one I normally go on, but I wondered if there was anything about the coronation. I thought it would be a nice gentle conversation while I wasn't feeling well.

Well pretty much every thread had the same two groups of posters on. Poster set #1, manic republicans who want to say everything negative about the monarchy, with things like "bring down the monarchy". Why they would seek out the royal family topic is beyond me.
And set #2 the "Harry and Meghan can do no wrong" set, who are absolutely obsessed with them. Which means they believe every word from their mouths - except the ones where "they didn't really mean that, everyone else is just twisting what they said" when they're giving direct quotes. And every positive newspaper article from whatever source. Any negative newspaper articles are of course Fake News. And anything about any other Royal Family member has to be twisted round to show How Much better they are.

Both sets seem to tend to turn every subject round to their particular fad, and are quite unpleasant to anyone who doesn't share their opinion, and fawn over each other. You could post "does Louis have Weetabix for breakfast" and most of the replies would fall into "I don't care what that privileged brat does. Vive la republic" or "Well Archie and Lilibet have organic bran flakes with plain yoghurt while Harry and Meghan sing educational songs in the background. I expect Louis is given a plain piece of toast by his nanny and told to eat up and be quiet."

Only time I've really wished for a block feature on MN. There were about 6 or 7 posters there who the topic would definitely benefit from not hearing from them.

Posters who say their child is gifted ( mostly with very good reason), only to be shot down by people telling them that:

1. their child's abilities and talents are totally normal - all children are like this, and

2. even if they are gifted, they're probably emotionally stunted and will grow up to be social misfits.

they're probably emotionally stunted and will grow up to be social misfits.

That's OK, they can just hang out here.

The what to wear to a wedding dilemmas.
Person posts a perfectly reasonable high street dress in pastel colour asking if it's suitable for a wedding. Cue lots of ppl saying it's too bridal ! Then suggesting something completely different for £400.
Others will comment that you'll need a jacket/polo neck/cardigan if its in a church if any part of your neck/shoulder/arm is visible! Of course black is not allowed and nothing too bold that will draw attention to yourself.

@Botw1

And the recent notion that people should be paid by the government to stay at home and look after their own children because society should be eternally grateful that Charlene at number 10 is raising the cream of the future.

For me it’s the utterly obscure baby names. We’ve all seen them and I’m quite sure nobody uses them in real life.

Oh yes they do.

You must live a very, very sheltered life:-)

Why do you think it’s BS for people to only buy what they need? It is possible to eat well on £50 a week. Not everyone fills their trolley with snack items and ready made meals.

Not everyone can afford £1000 a month to spend on food. There’s a thread running right now. Apparently the poster spends £1200 a month on food. Maybe she does. That doesn’t mean nobody can eat well on £200 a month.

How would you manage if you didn’t have £100 a week to spend on food?

Where? I didn't think my tribe existed on MN

:-)