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Original poster

Mumsnet “norms” that annoy you most

1000 replies

usernamechanged1 · 31/03/2023 21:27

For me it’s the utterly obscure baby names. We’ve all seen them and I’m quite sure nobody uses them in real life. Yet on MN, it’s apparently standard.

Honourable mention to the 50% of posters whose husbands are earning upwards of £100K too.

OP posts:
x2boys · 01/04/2023 08:24

monkeysmum21 · 01/04/2023 08:20

Every kid could go to a grammar school, they just choose not to. And every parent that put their kids through the 11+ are not thinking about the kid’s happiness.

And ignoring the fact that in most parts of the UK the Grammar school system has,nt,existed for 40+ plus years anyway!

ouchmyteeth · 01/04/2023 08:24

‘Grim’

‘Safeguarding issue’

Ignorant attitudes to children with SEN, particularly when it comes to challenging behaviour… lots of insistence that their NT child behaves because of their superior parenting and instilling FIRM CLEAR BOUNDARIES (‘boundaries’ another one which is constantly used here) and clearly kids with SEN just need better parenting.

‘Gosh’

I’ve also noticed in school discussions if someone posts that they went to private school they’ll often add something about their parents having a totally average income but ‘scrimped and saved and we all had to make sacrifices so me and my sibling could have a private education’

Mademetoxic · 01/04/2023 08:25

That everyone is 'senior' level at work earning ££££ a month.
Where are all the shop workers, carers, etc on here ?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
KillingLoneliness · 01/04/2023 08:27

When someone is financially struggling you always see someone listing things to cut back on for example: the yearly holiday, 6 weekly haircuts, nails/lashes.
People struggling financially don’t do any of those things!
I swear the majority on here live in a different world!

Fizbosshoes · 01/04/2023 08:28

Mademetoxic · 01/04/2023 08:25

That everyone is 'senior' level at work earning ££££ a month.
Where are all the shop workers, carers, etc on here ?

I do notice this but my guess is that shop workers, cleaners, florists, factory workers, carers etc are not online during their working day and possibly commute....so maybe have less time and scope to post?

Livelifelaughter · 01/04/2023 08:33

Ames85 · 31/03/2023 21:57

Man bashing. Husbands/partners must immediately be ditched for being anything other than perfect. Talking and working on relationships couldn’t possibly be a sensible solution

I would agree with this. Followed by " and then I met a lovely man who is now my husband" ...what if you don't, was it really worth binning someone for not immediately changing. I remember posting on here that I was unhappy my bf hadn't told his children about me etc, lots of MN saying "run for the hills, it will get worse" fast forward a few weeks and he sorted it...

Irecan · 01/04/2023 08:33

Jamieleecurtain · 01/04/2023 07:49

Finding any reason whatsoever to take against the side of the OP in AIBU because it’s more entertaining to berate a person who is reading your comments rather than the other side who won’t read it. Particularly disgusting when the OP is vulnerable/upset.

Also this is the exact reason why people do ‘reverse’ threads so the uproar that ensues when a reverse is revealed is really ridiculous too.

whats a reverse thread?

stormelf · 01/04/2023 08:35

Siblings can't share a room once they reach secondary school they need to use their rooms for studying. Every bedroom needs room for a desk. I shared a room, never had a desk and did very well at school. Never used a desk at uni either, still survived.

HarlanPepper · 01/04/2023 08:36

"I mean this kindly"

Tessisme · 01/04/2023 08:36

Icantakemyselfdancing · 31/03/2023 23:12

Those eating ones where they eat practically nothing all day. So weird.

And when you make comment like above and posters gleefully come into the thread teeth gnashing and foaming , their keyboard on fire to pull you up on something / anything that’s not quite right. It’s like they are poised for the kill, hovering waiting for an innocent to slip up in any way. Make my day bitch , here I come 😡

🤣🤣🤣 This conjured up such a funny image in my head!!

Livelifelaughter · 01/04/2023 08:37

A separated man (even if for years) is married and you should wait until they are divorced because that takes 5 minutes....oh and it means you have no morals. None.

Liorae · 01/04/2023 08:38

Maireas · 01/04/2023 07:24

Yes, and we did it deliberately in order to trash the next generation.

Show quote history

You did, you bastard, and should now hand it over to your daughter in law and pay her to live there. You should then buy a studio flat in which to mind your grandson for free 5 days a week.

Pipsquiggle · 01/04/2023 08:38

I would like mumsnet to share the data they have on us so we know if a wage of £100k is common

Where mumsnet users over and under index

Teateaandmoretea · 01/04/2023 08:39

I’ve also noticed in school discussions if someone posts that they went to private school they’ll often add something about their parents having a totally average income but ‘scrimped and saved and we all had to make sacrifices so me and my sibling could have a private education’

Indeed, and conversely you will struggle to send kids to private school unless you earn a household income of over 200k.

It is otoh absolutely impossible to struggle if you are careful on 50k, even if you have to pay £1K a month in nursery fees. Our local private schools otoh have fees of 15k per year.

Teateaandmoretea · 01/04/2023 08:41

There is never any consideration of whether people have a mortgage for example, it’s all about income. IRL a lot of people pay off the mortgage on an average house I think rather than keep increasing outgoings.

Vliss · 01/04/2023 08:41

Teateaandmoretea · 01/04/2023 08:39

I’ve also noticed in school discussions if someone posts that they went to private school they’ll often add something about their parents having a totally average income but ‘scrimped and saved and we all had to make sacrifices so me and my sibling could have a private education’

Indeed, and conversely you will struggle to send kids to private school unless you earn a household income of over 200k.

It is otoh absolutely impossible to struggle if you are careful on 50k, even if you have to pay £1K a month in nursery fees. Our local private schools otoh have fees of 15k per year.

Tbf it was possible to scrimp and save for private school 30 years ago. Not now! Even at the cheapest secondary one near us you are looking at 18k a year per child, and that's obviously from taxed income.

Liorae · 01/04/2023 08:42

DebussytoaDiscoBeat · 01/04/2023 05:26

Hot chocolate is some kind of huge treat to be saved for Christmas Eve or if you’re going to be giving your child bad news. “Tell them that their dad’s leaving to join a commune of mountain goat-herders then take them out for a hot chocolate.”

Mumsnet mums don't go out for hot chocolate, they snuggle on the couch with it.

Teateaandmoretea · 01/04/2023 08:43

@Vliss but that is 36k per year for two children.

People have inheritance, different levels of outgoings.

You don’t need to be on 200k unless you have a very expensive lifestyle otherwise.

BellePeppa · 01/04/2023 08:43

Speakeasy22 · 01/04/2023 07:34

Parents in the 60s, 70s and 80s pretty much ignored their children, turfed them out to play or left them alone in the house (probably with a box of matches to play with). And it was the norm to slap your children.

That’s true though 😁

Chinchinchoroo · 01/04/2023 08:44

ReneBumsWombats · 01/04/2023 07:38

Being baffled by, and struggling to understand, things that are really very simple. Saw a woman once who claimed to have "never understood the concept of Christmas pyjamas" and another who was "always baffled by hot chocolate". There are loads of them on the designer handbag thread too, struggling to understand the luxury goods market.

What are all these people finding so difficult?

This gets me all the time. Utterly mundane things being treated as some kind of alien concept.

Two stuck out to me last weekend. One being people putting butter on crackers before cheese being "something I've never heard of, do people do this?" And another being people seeming to be 'baffled' (another MN thing) that some people put money in a card for adults birthday/Xmas/Mothers day. "What? People give adults money in a card? That's for children or teenagers with no income. An adult receiving money in a card is immature and weird"

I imagine these posters being constantly stunned that other people don't do things that they do or do different things and that is somehow considered as astonishing or odd or weird and not just "my world isn't the only one that exists".

whiteroseredrose · 01/04/2023 08:47

Schmutter · 31/03/2023 22:35

The allusion to the husband’s ‘hobby’ without giving details.

It’s almost certainly golf or cycling; I don’t get the secretiveness. It’s hardly identifying.

Exactly. The roads near here are full of MAMILs.

WillowtreeHouse · 01/04/2023 08:47

Liorae · 31/03/2023 21:46

Nobody on Mumsnet discusses, they confront.

Yep, this one. And the passive aggressive 'so what did DH say when you confronted him about his appalling behaviour', when a poster clearly hasn't spoken to anyone and is just looking for advice first.

People imply that they are absolutely merciless and 'put up with no shit' when, in reality, most of us don't really know how to navigate certain situations without a bit of thought.

BellePeppa · 01/04/2023 08:50

The absolute support of a poster because they’re a woman when, if the roles were reversed, the man would be slaughtered for doing the exact same thing.

AngelinaFibres · 01/04/2023 08:51

That all MILS are total bitches who should be excluded from every aspect of their son's life, once he and a partner move in together. No visiting new babies, no being invited to things. The DILs mother acquires saintly status at exactly the same point. Some of us are lovely MILS. The MIL bashing on this thread is vile. Might be good if DILs on here, who only have boy children themselves , looked ahead a little.

WillowtreeHouse · 01/04/2023 08:51

This gets me all the time. Utterly mundane things being treated as some kind of alien concept.

Totally agree with this @Chinchinchoroo it's so ridiculous. Someone emailed me the other day about a situation at work which they were 'struggling to process'. There was nothing to process. A situation occured, it was dealt with and everyone (apart from this processing person) moved on. It's a drain.

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