Why do you think so many kids are so badly behaved?

[tikasaurois]

I'm mainly talking about high school age but I suppose kids of all ages are very different to when I was growing up (I'm 47) are we being too lax and not giving kids enough discipline? I'm a cleaner in a high school and honestly I find it disgusting how some children behave! Absolutely no respect or anyone or anything. Really rude, ignorant and downright disrespectful to everyone ( and I include the principal in this) why are the parents not doing more to reel their children in? Do parents not care? Are we as society failing these kids? Of course there are many wonderful well mannered children that are a pleasure to share company with but my question is why has behaviour deteriorated so much in schools and what can be done to help ?

Whaaaat? Are you saying that you can't parent effectively if you work?! I work full time in a senior job and my kids have been brought up to be well behaved and respect others.

I'm an 80s kid and I can tell you that my primary school years had 9 year old smoking, kids escaping from school, fights at primary and racism was rife.

These kids are now parents. Not to one child. Or two. But six, seven, eight etc

And the cycle continues!

The only difference I can think of is that teachers these days aren't allowed to intervene to the same extent.

E.g a teacher used to tap us (not hurt) with a ruler to make us pay attention. They used to slam down huge textbooks on the desk to stop us from chatting and grab actual clothes to pull apart a fight. If you were cheeky to a teacher they would literally make you face a wall for 5 mins and apologise. It was humiliating but worked!

Most of us went to high school, we remember exactly how horrid our peers could be.

I don't know whether people (not just children) are becoming more rude or I'm becoming a grumpy old woman....possibly both are true.
Today 2 people (adult) , on separate occasions hit me on the head with their umbrella. The first apologised profusely, the 2nd didn't even notice.
Then I went to go into the post offi

Nonsense OP, the teenage years are always very difficult, teenagers can be right little shits. 30 years ago I remember hearing about the bottom set French class locking their teacher in the cupboard. At 15/16 when we finished for study leave we all went down the local pub. We also had a student poison all the fish in our fish tank. This was in a good secondary in a good area as well.

This. Absolutely.

When I was teaching we got so fed up of the "Every behaviour is a form of communications" brigade.
We used to raise the point that this wouldn't happen in the workplace but they didn't seem to have an answer to that.
Far too much emphasis is placed on REASONS for behaviour when it's EXCUSES.

To be fair I went to school with a bunch of c but I went to school in the no discipline area too.

Also, I really hope at least some people on this thread one day have nightmare teens to deal with. 😌

Oh FFS. Yes I'm sure you're perfect and your offspring too.

I've also been lucky with my kids, but I try not to be snotty about it.

I am also 47 like you OP and teach in a primary school.

Definitely behaviour is worse these days. And I don't think we can keep blaming covid any more. I agree with you. Parents not doing their job. Expecting school to do it all for them. Then blaming school when it doesn't work out!

Fear of saying no (not sure why, never had this issue myself). Not setting boundaries. Children don't know when to stop, when enough is enough. No consequences, or none that make any real difference ie that they really care about.

Children have way too many rights these days imho. Adults don't implement any kind of authority for fear of repercussions.

Parents with poor mental health or lacking in education or support networks not being able to provide a decent upbringing for their kids, resulting in more children with mental health issues and so tge cycle continues.

The teen who tells his teacher to fuck off when they are told to go out into the playground at break time is badly behaved

Teens used to call teachers cunts in the 80s and 90s allllll the time. I remember one boy calling my history teacher a "self righteous twat" & the teacher chucked a chair at him. Being told to fuck off would be classed as mediocre in our school! 😱

When I was in school (90s) there were 'nice' kids and badly behaved little shits. Same as it's always been.

I was in school in the 80s. I never witnessed anyone throwing chairs, tipping tables, or smashing up a room. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Never heard this before but made me chuckle.
I don't know the answer but have always brought my kids up with a lot of love and support as well as clear boundaries. This included being polite and respectful to adults as a general rule.
Maybe I was just lucky but it seemed to work well.

I was in school in the 80s. I never witnessed anyone throwing chairs, tipping tables, or smashing up a room. 🤷🏻‍♀️

The only people to do this in my school were the teachers 😂

Kids are not badly behaved.

They have behavioural problems. It’s no doubt not their fault and all down to a combination of brexit and the Covid lockdown.

Just needs more social workers and a few million spending on counselling.

Discipline is obviously out of the question.

Brilliant answer. Guess what I do?

You must have lived in a particular bubble.

You could watch Grange Hill for some low-level insights.

Do you not remember the bus seats all melted where people had burnt them with their lighters?
All those campaigns against glue sniffing?
Don't go on the railway tracks?

I went to both private and state, both were wilder than now.

Lol. Accidently pressed post. Went to go in the post office, it was absolutely pouring, and an entire family are just faffing about in the doorway for about a minute, so noone can get inside. Mum, dad and 2 kids of around 10 (all old enough to perceive that other people might want to go in, especially if it's raining) It's like people are unaware anyone except them exists!

Too few boundaries and too much pandering.

What they are trying to say is " I am desperate for someone adult and sensible to draw a line in the sand, set a boundary and tell and show me where it is. Then I can relax and feel secure within that safe firm boundary, like a child should. "

And what about the children who do have ASD/ADHD etc? Your comment is ableist in the extreme!

It really is. Up to 25% of the male prison population has ADHD or ADHD traits. That's not a tiny number. Early intervention is the way forward, plenty of parents are genuinely doing their best and they still have 'troubled' kids.

Well, it was very common for kids to get smacked about at home if they were bad at school.

In the 80s - I knew plenty of kids who'd have their mouth rinsed out with soap if they were naughty / cheeky to adults.

I'm glad it's changed tbh

I’m 43, I don’t know what school you went to but the “naughty” kids weren’t the ones that came in late or didn’t do their homework. The naughty kids were the ones doing drugs openly at school, openly smoking (on the cricket pitch), throwing chairs at teachers. I know of at least 4 people who have died of drug overdoses.

my niece is 16 and honestly the kids are way better behaved and achieve more now than what we did.

every older generation says the current teenagers are the worst yet 🙄