Trigger warning - incomprehensible tragedy

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Two beautiful little boys strangled, and mother hung, and the boys looked so well cared for and loved, plenty of toys, nice clothes, lovingly photographed

I just cant bear to think of what went on in that house in those last moments, those poor poor children

How can this happen? How was this impossible to see coming?

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-65065560

Well said

Such a double standard isn’t it

Maximus had been found "on the bed while Alexander was lying on the floor next to the bed". "The provisional cause of death for both of them was given as ligature compression to the neck pending further investigation," he said.

I hope this isn't tasteless to say but – a murder suicide is always awful but I honestly think guns (instant death) like in the headteacher case might be more merciful. It requires around 5 minutes to strangle someone fully to death, beyond unconsciousness. In cases like this, one child would have seen his mother strangling his brother to death for a while, while awaiting his turn.

Many many years ago, a neighbour did similar. Absolutely incomprehensible, there were no easy answers as to why it happened, or how it could have been prevented.

It still haunts me some days.

As well as this, if you're a professional worried about this, it's so hard to convince other professionals to listen. I once worked with a family where the mother had made several comments about how and when she was going to kill her children. Other professionals didn't want to listen or take me seriously but she was talking about crushing tablets and putting them in the babies bottle. It can be so hard to actually be able to intervene in this type of dangerous scenario

“Since it was a woman” it must be ok then I guess, because she must have been struggling?

But no doubt if it was a man it would be because he’s an evil bastard.

Mumsnet never fails to amaze.

That's just silly! Your MH could be perfectly ok when you have your children, but life later gets in the way.

They were such beautiful children. The videos they'd made of themselves would just break your heart.

Absolutely none of this is OK. It’s clearly the opposite of OK.

I think if anyone’s going to take issue with a post maybe the ones crawling through her Facebook like flies through shit or the ones speculating on which child died first and how long it took would be a good place to start for my part, I can see being a lone parent is challenging, that it could lead to extremely poor mental health and a subsequent psychosis.

I am not speculating. I am pointing out a fact. Strangling takes ages. The children would have died horribly, and in a deliberate manner. All the more I feel extreme sympathy for them, which I am simply stating.

You're speculating about the circumstances of the murder / the mother having psychosis, which we in no way know or can confirm. It doesn't stop being speculation just because you're the one doing it...

Now you're just entering the realms of speculation.

You don't know what the circumstances were.

Yeah we got it thanks @okaybut

Don't be stupid, of course not. I wouldn't tend to describe a child as "ugly" anyway!

I haven't read the article, but if their mum killed them, it would have been to protect them so that they didn't have to live without her. Because she felt that she needed to end her own life and didn't want them to suffer as a result.

Considering you were just groundlessly speculating above that someone suffers from hallucinations and delusions, I would say it's topical that you're now referring to yourself as multiple people.

Um what? How did you conclude that. It is certainly plausible that that was her thought process but I do not understand how you immediately jumped to this just because it was a woman who did it

In your opinion.

You seem to be excusing this woman murdering her children. She killed her fucking kids with her bare hands. Not quickly. Not just one. They had a father.

Maybe a man murders his children so that they don't have to live without him? Yet I've never seen anyone hypothesise that. It's always that he's a violent, controlling, possessive psychopath.

If my neighbour, friend or relative was intent on doing herself in, I'd rather she dropped her kids on my doorstep and have me deal with fallout than take them down with her.

There is no difference in a woman killing her kids, than a man doing it.

Anyone who kills a child is vile, regardless of sex.

Only on MN would some posters use a woman killing her kids as an excuse to blame a man.

This poor man has had to identify his children’s dead bodies.
The children had slow, traumatic deaths and one had to watch the other being killed.
Their extended family and friends will have to live with these horrendous deaths for the rest of their lives.

Implying that the murderer isn’t as much to blame simply because she’s a woman is a slap in the face for everyone involved.

Yep

Neither did the mother. Something went horribly wrong for her mental health to decline so much this seemed like a reasonable option.

Poor family.

So a really sad story about a mother that murdered her kids and you are somehow blaming dads ?!!

Not to be hash but if she was struggling with mental health and chooses suicide as her opinion... Why not just kill herself instead she took her two boys life aswel. I am struggling with mental health myself but i couldn't imagine killing my children... I understand that everyone copes differently but there is no excuse why she felt the need to end her boys life aswel if that is what actually happened.

Really? The dad who murdered his wife and children the other year was described as an 'upstamdinh citizen acting out of character' and the news was almost exclusively about men and their mental health. The idea men are held to a higher standard regarding domestic violence is laughable.

Absolutely x

I wasnt talking about the news I was talking about the users on here