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Original poster

How to bag a rich husband?

227 replies

Sugarfish · 17/03/2023 16:38

I’m not really looking for a rich husband, I’m in a very happy long term relationship with my average earning partner, but I’ve seen a lot of threads here where women are married to dh’s who earn over 6 figures. And I’m just being nosey about how you met. Currently have covid and bored but also genuinely interested. Especially if you’re from different “classes” as I’m from a working class family and in my circles, no one earns close to that so I would not know where to look even if I did want to “marry well” as my mother would call it!

If you come from a high earning family, did you always have an expectation that you’d have a certain lifestyle so specifically chose someone with a high earning job? Or are you also a high earner and met through work / uni. If you’re a low earner compared to your husband, do you ever feel like he thinks he’s more important in the relationship because of this, and how did you meet him?

Also to switch it round for fairness, if you’re the higher earner, how did you meet and does your dh ever feel threatened? Do people ever comment on it?

Have any of you ever faced and snobbery / reverse snobbery due to your choice of Partner?

OP posts:
Inject · 17/03/2023 23:06

2023a · 17/03/2023 23:00

You can feel however you want, tbh. Nobody actually asked. You shared your incorrect and, quite frankly, rather ignorant views on the economic realities of London and I responded.

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No one asked you either.

2023a · 17/03/2023 23:09

Inject · 17/03/2023 23:06

No one asked you either.

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No one asked me what, exactly?

Sushi4Dins · 17/03/2023 23:10

Inject · 17/03/2023 23:06

No one asked you either.

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Honestly, just stop. 🤣

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Marriage & partnerships
Bearpawk · 17/03/2023 23:18

Lots of people in my circle and at my place of work earn 100k+, women included. Don't think the women djd anything to 'bag' the men, lots met in normal ways (uni/ through friends/ tinder)

Sushi4Dins · 17/03/2023 23:23

DanceMonster · 17/03/2023 22:06

Where do you live?

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A small rented cottage. She’s on a pitiful £250K a year and thus feels poor. The poor poor thing.

She recognises that there are people ‘people on benefits and £25k per annum etc’ (clearly the next economic rung from her life of deprivation), but she doesn’t know those sorts of people.

2023username · 17/03/2023 23:27

100k plus isn’t all that much when you take off taxes, childcare, housing, bills - in London at least. OP do you mean proper rich? I think these days it needs to be 7 figures to be sure to exceed making ends meet. Sad but true. We both earn 100k plus and we certainly don’t feel rich. You also have to pay people to support your ability to work, because you are out of the home for 12 hours a day, so nannies, cleaners, tutors, window cleaners, dog walkers etc.

2023a · 17/03/2023 23:30

2023username · 17/03/2023 23:27

100k plus isn’t all that much when you take off taxes, childcare, housing, bills - in London at least. OP do you mean proper rich? I think these days it needs to be 7 figures to be sure to exceed making ends meet. Sad but true. We both earn 100k plus and we certainly don’t feel rich. You also have to pay people to support your ability to work, because you are out of the home for 12 hours a day, so nannies, cleaners, tutors, window cleaners, dog walkers etc.

You also have to pay people to support your ability to work, because you are out of the home for 12 hours a day, so nannies, cleaners, tutors, window cleaners, dog walkers etc.

Ah, multiple staff. So often available to people who aren’t rich. 😊

I think these days it needs to be 7 figures to be sure to exceed making ends meet.

🤣🤣🤣

Inject · 17/03/2023 23:30

2023username · 17/03/2023 23:27

100k plus isn’t all that much when you take off taxes, childcare, housing, bills - in London at least. OP do you mean proper rich? I think these days it needs to be 7 figures to be sure to exceed making ends meet. Sad but true. We both earn 100k plus and we certainly don’t feel rich. You also have to pay people to support your ability to work, because you are out of the home for 12 hours a day, so nannies, cleaners, tutors, window cleaners, dog walkers etc.

Careful - you'll be taken to task now for saying that. You're rich and should not complain or state a view or feeling.

weegiemum · 17/03/2023 23:32

My dh is a GP and earns into 6 figures. We met at university and married while he was still a medical student, I was teaching by then.

I had ML off with dc but kept working until I became disabled 11 years ago. I'm retraining, as a counsellor, not for the money but for my own interest.

2023username · 17/03/2023 23:39

I’m not complaining- I enjoy working and would hate to not earn my own money. However I’m just being honest, I have friends who are properly
wealthy and we live very different lives to them. I am shocked by how much some families spend on holidays for example - I often see it on Mumsnet. Skiing or sun holidays, for a family of four, can amount to several thousand pounds per week. More than once a year. We don’t have that kind of disposable income despite being “high earners”. By the time tax and bills (endless bills!) are paid we don’t even manage to save much. It feels like a treadmill sometimes but I think a lot of that is due to living in London, it’s just expensive.

2023username · 17/03/2023 23:41

Anyway OP just work hard and earn your own money, it is the only thing you can control.

wtfisgoingonhere21 · 17/03/2023 23:41

Met dh through friends.

At that time he was earning more than me by a considerable amount not that I knew that or thought about it

I grew up watching my mum have absolutely no idea about how to manage money and she has never worked a job more than three days a week in her life. My dad did and still does cover everything as they were very old fashioned in that way.

It just made me determined to be financially independent no matter what.

After marriage and first child my earnings dropped a lot while dh went up more again and then we both just worked our way up from there really.

Dc late teens now and adult age and I earn 3 x dh salary in my business

Mangomingo · 17/03/2023 23:46

Colleague married the son of a billionaire who owns half of London. They met at their place of worship. Flowers at their wedding cost 300k.
She still works 12 hour night shifts although has gone on mat leave and I do wonder if she’ll be back…. (Because I wouldn’t)

Hawkins003 · 17/03/2023 23:48

Reading with intrigue

TMess · 17/03/2023 23:49

When I met him he was making low average, if that, but he was young, ambitious, and had a strong work ethic. Ten years on, he makes well into six figures. I definitely married for love, not money, and he was significantly less well off and from a much more poor background than my family.

HelloBunny · 17/03/2023 23:53

I had a few chances of marrying, before I met my DH. The guys in question would have provided a nice home, cars, holidays etc... My DH came with none of those things. It’s not easy being skint. And I’m still friends with my exes, I know they have comfortable lives, materially speaking.
But, there’s a boat-load of other issues that come with top-end jobs. None of the guys have kids, but might have had them with me. The women they’re with now enjoy the jet-set lifestyle. And fair play to them!

AdoraBell · 17/03/2023 23:57

Not me but DH’s niece was told to University to find a rich man. She spent the first year trying to get a rich man. She dropped out because no one fancied her.

FleetIlya · 18/03/2023 00:33

Name changed...

Honestly, I deliberately went out looking for one. And it worked.

I was 28, living in a dingy London flat share, in a dead end job with an irrelevant degree and miserable. I realised that my only hope of having the life in the big city that I wanted was to do something drastic, as the world was going to shit and my hard work in my chosen field was getting me nowhere.

I started looking up and going to, for want of a better word, exclusive sex clubs, and learned my way around. I kept it up, with the express intention of meeting someone wealthy. Long story short - within a year I was casually seeing two people, a B-list actor and my DP. DP "stuck", and we've been together for six years. We live together, we like each other a great deal, and we're very happy.

I genuinely pinch myself some days because I almost can't believe that I had the gall to do what I did, or that I actually pulled it off.

I'm aware that a lot of people will have some very strong opinions and feelings about what I did, and all kinds of things to say about it, and I'm ok with that. It worked out great for both of us and I have no regrets.

AviMav · 18/03/2023 01:02

Inject · 17/03/2023 23:30

Careful - you'll be taken to task now for saying that. You're rich and should not complain or state a view or feeling.

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I don't think its that's but come on. There's some interesting tales here. Some are saying they kept working a 12 hour shift despite the wealth. Some are saying they went back to work after DC even.

You cut your cloth accordingly. Even in London it is expensive absolutely but the more you earn the more you are spending.. clearly.

CAJIE · 18/03/2023 01:08

How this can even be posted in 2023 is beyond me.Bagging a husband?? Bagging a rich one? Men are not game.Such a disgusting phrase.Obviously on some level we are still in 1950 or perhaps 1850.

NeverApologiseNeverExplain · 18/03/2023 01:10

dollypartin · 17/03/2023 18:28

Met at cambridge doing our studies.

Really? Because absolutely nobody who really went to Cambridge would describe being there as "doing our studies" Hmm

Fifi0000 · 18/03/2023 01:13

I met DH when I was 18 , he was unemployed at the time and had just finished his masters. I think most who marry wealthy men meet them young and they aren't wealthy then. Men who are kind , stable with potential to succeed are more likely to be partnered off earlier than the player types. To be honest I've never wanted to date a bad boy. I wanted on the whole a good man who would be financially solvent. Even at 17 I thought like this 🤣🤣

AviMav · 18/03/2023 01:15

user1496262496 · 17/03/2023 18:46

How to bag a rich husband? Be a rich woman.

Kill joy. Its a really good thread! I think some of these women haven't done anything wrong I haven't read a post stating they are miserable and are just staying for the money. They said their expectations out loud and it paid good for them.

Perhaps that's what's lacking in our gen? Women got married on these morals and it worked.. back in the day.

Fifi0000 · 18/03/2023 01:19

Oh I work incredibly hard too in a job. I like having my own income. I do see a lot of women wasting their time with idiots then complaining where are the good men? The good men were partnered and married off years ago.

WandaWonder · 18/03/2023 01:23

For some women it is intentional, they go to to right schools and their sole purpose is 'marrying well' so they can play tennis, do lunch, have the children and ignore the affairs/bad behaviour because they get the lifestyle

For some it is normal like meeting anyone

For some they fake it or go on reality to 'bag' a footballer, z list celebrity

Personally I couldn't do it unless it was just part of him like me liking reading or watching TV, yes there are some 'normal' rich people

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