Personally, I think engaged means there is a definite plan to get married and it’s within a timeframe, even if it’s a bit vague long timeframe, such as in the next 3 years.
Agreeing that at some indefinite point in the future, marriage is on the cards and is the next step in your relationship, doesn’t sound like an engagement to me….just both saying that they hope to move in that direction. But it’s not certain.
People often talk about the future. It can be quite hypothetical. ‘Yes, I really want to get married one day’ or ‘I can see us being married in a few years’ or ‘I think we will get married’
I guess proposals can take all forms from the man having been out and bought a ring and getting down on one knee and there being a plan about when and where within a few hours, to something that happens fairly spontaneously without any bells and whistles, but is still a shift from the position of there is no plan to get married, to there is a plan.
To be, getting engaged means having decided to get married. You don’t decide to get engaged with being engaged being a state in itself, without marriage being the end point.
OP, you said ‘yes please’ - I think he wwasnt proposing and will have taken what you said to mean agreement, that all that was left to do was to get married. If this was a proposal, after the kiss there would have been further talk. It would be very odd for neither person to say anymore about it.
To be honest, the communication doesn’t sound great. You clearly want to get married. Have you to,d him that very clearly or just hoped he knows? Your reply last night might not have made it clear you really want to do it soon, if your previous conversations have been similarly vague. Of course, you might have been much clearer previously and he might have no doubt about it and is telling you he can see a future when it happens…but it’s not right now.
Sometimes you have to have some tricky conversations and out yourself on thr line a bit. Back in the day when my DH and myself had been together for a while but weren’t married, I wanted to get married and we had a couple of quite tricky conversations about the future and timescales. DH certainly wanted to be married in his future but had to decide if I was definitely the one. I had already decided. He knew that because I told him. And I told him that I could wait for him to decide, but he would have to decide one way or the other. And there was a period of time when I knew we would either decide to get married or we would break up. Neither of us were interested in a relationship which spanned years without marriage, which was delaying us finding our actual future spouse. We actually got engaged at the point we’d been together 18 months and were married at the 2 year point.
I realise not everyone feels like this. Lots of people go years and years without making the commitment to marry…and it’s often a source of spoken or unspoken difficulty. Especially if people have kids, they are often not prepared to end a relationship over the marriage question, and I guess that indicates that it’s important to them, but not as vital as it was to me, or to some other people.
I wouldn’t ask the question ‘are we engaged’. I’d ask him if he remembers the conversation last night, and tell him that you’re really keen to get married and are glad he sees that in the future too, and want him to know, you’d love to do it soon. The ball really is then in his court.