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Original poster

Football causing issues between dad and Husband

177 replies

Nowheretogo1985 · 12/03/2023 07:34

Hello!
Anyone got any advice please? It sounds ridiculous but football is causing a problem between my dad and Husband.
Both are passionate about the teams they support (both different) but my husband doesn't want my dad talking to my son about the team he supports as he feels like my dad is trying to coax him away from my husband's team. If that makes sense!
My dad wants to take my son to a match but husband won't allow him.
My husband came home from work last week and my dad (who was looking after my children) had drawn the emblem of his football team on the children's chalkboard. Words have been exchanged via text between both men (my husband asked him not to do such things) and now I feel like it's awkward. I can see them really falling out over it.
I'm just not sure what to do 😭
Sorry if it's sounds trivial but I'm bot sure what to do!!

OP posts:

MaireadMcSweeney · 12/03/2023 07:37

Tell your husband to stop being pathetic???

DustyLee123 · 12/03/2023 07:38

I agree, your husband is at fault.

WillowtreeHouse · 12/03/2023 07:41

Your husband is being an absolute dick. Tell him to grow up for god's sake. We are a football household (different teams) and I wouldn't tolerate this shit from DH and he wouldn't from me.

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PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 12/03/2023 07:41

But equally, your dad is poking the bear. How hard would it have been to draw something else?! They both need to grow up.

CarrieSmisher · 12/03/2023 07:42

Been there, can I hazard a guess they're Scottish? Either way, I'd tell the pair of them if they can't behave there will be no football talk for either of them. They act like kids, you'll treat them like kids.

Gonnagetacatwhenimovein · 12/03/2023 07:42

What important is to nurture a passion for sport and keeping fit, team work, dedication etc. if your son gets that from 2 make time models in his life then great. Doesn’t matter what team he ends up supporting. Your husband is being a dick if he tries to block that for his son. His first alligence is to his son, not his football club.

Meadowfly · 12/03/2023 07:42

They both need to grow up. It’s a game.

Gonnagetacatwhenimovein · 12/03/2023 07:42

should say male role models

MisgenderedSwan · 12/03/2023 07:44

My husband and dad support different teams. My 9yo loves football and enjoys talking to them both about the matches each weekend. My dad makes a game of trying to get my ds to admit he supports grandad's team, my husband laughs and does the same. Does it really matter at the end of the day?

Donnashair · 12/03/2023 07:44

Wow, your husband is a dick. Tell him to grow up.

So what if your son supports the same team as you dad.

what happens if your son dare to not like football or , shock horror, support a third team?

Your dad provides childcare but your husband sees his arse over a difference in football teams?

kissthegirlshesnotbehindthedoor · 12/03/2023 07:44

Husband is ridiculous (and controlling)! And dad is noodling him!

Being taken to a match with your dad is something they would treasure!

Tell husband to get a grip you need to take a stand with this.

Magenta82 · 12/03/2023 07:44

I think the whole football thing is pathetic and childish.

However your dad is being a dick and deliberately trying to drive a wedge between your husband and children over something that is important to your husband.

Cosycover · 12/03/2023 07:45

Ridiculous behaviour on both sides here. I'd be having stern words with both parties.

DustyLee123 · 12/03/2023 07:46

And if your DH doesn’t want your DF influencing his child he needs to look after his own kid, instead of getting free child care.

CalistoNoSolo · 12/03/2023 07:46

God how pathetic. How could you bear to procreate with someone as juvenile? I wouldn't even date someone obsessed with football, it's such a shite game and really seems to be for the lowest common denominator.

sashagabadon · 12/03/2023 07:47

What if the son dislikes football! And prefer cricket or nothing at all.
sounds infuriating OP. I would think both men are being ridiculous

QuillBill · 12/03/2023 07:48

I'd tell your husband that he needs to take your dads 'hilarious' antics as a joke.

'As if he'd want to support Sunderland Dave...blah blah blah. I'll have to order a new blackboard now. Give me that chalk, I'll have to burn it'

Perhaps that's what your dad is looking for because otherwise he's doing it to piss your husband off. Which would be a strange thing to do in someone's home with their child.

smellyflowers · 12/03/2023 07:49

Take your child to watch rugby?

sashagabadon · 12/03/2023 07:49

I totally get why men love football though. I got caught up in the 2.30pm tube journey to a west London club yesterday packed full of men ( some women) enjoying themselves and having a laugh and I wished for a moment to be a football fan too😁

Newuser82 · 12/03/2023 07:52

Oh dear! My husband is exactly the same. It drives me mad! It's absolutely ridiculous behaviour. He will say stuff like oh no, hold your nose as we are driving past the other stadium. Calls the other team the scum. It's so stupid. Then he wonders why I hate football!

MarshaMelrose · 12/03/2023 07:52

Your husband's at fault. Thinking he's poaching him for the other side?! Ridiculous. What happens if your son decides to support a completely different team from both of them? Will your husband get into rows with him? Let the lad decide. It's meant to be fun, not life and death, no matter what Bill Shankley said.

Catspyjamas17 · 12/03/2023 07:53

I managed to choose Man Utd when my dad is Man City. We rowed about lots of daft things but not football. He always cheered on Utd if they were not playing City because they were both Manchester as far as he was concerned, and I feel the same vice versa.

RunTowardsTheLight · 12/03/2023 07:53

They are both being silly, but sounds like your dad was deliberately trying to wind your husband up with the drawing thing.

Quartz2208 · 12/03/2023 07:54

They are both at fault. Your husband for being too controlling and your dad for taking it too far. Your children should be able to make their own choice

Piffle11 · 12/03/2023 07:55

I'm actually siding more with your DH than your DF on this one.

Children usually follow the team that their family supports: in this case, your DH. Your DF had this opportunity with his DC. If your DH didn't support a particular team then I would say no problem for your DS following his DGF's team… but it seems to me that your DF is deliberately trying to provoke your DH.

My friend's DH is a huge supporter of Manchester City - and his DF and brother - and their two teenage DC are also huge Manchester City supporters.

If my friends's DF supported Manchester United, and was trying to get the DC to follow Manchester United instead, I would think it was massively disrespectful.

I think if you are not really into football, it can be difficult to explain how passionate people get about it.

I think you need to have a word with your DF actually, and maybe tell DH not to get so wound up by him. And as another post I said, if it continues, maybe you need to find different childcare.

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