What is something someone has said that is etched in your brain?

[WhiteNoiseMoreToys]

Mine is when I was 17, pretty self conscious and just finished being intimate with my then boyfriend.

We decided to get up and go out and as I sat up to put my top on he poked my belly and said “Christ, you could feed Africa with that tyre” it baffles me now, how brazen it was to just come out with it. But I was a size 8-10 and honestly I think I’m still confused 😂

Its one of those things that ‘pop’ into my mind at random times ans it’s gout me wondering what others peoples ‘moments’ are when they remember something someone has said that might not have significance, but will always be remembered.

My mum, whilst cutting my hair in front of a friend - I was about 12 or 13 and she said to me ‘gosh you really are ugly aren’t you’ 😢

I hate to say it but that would intrigue me! It’s so blatant and straightforward I almost admire it 😂

My dad taking me outside and telling me to look at the stars to tell me how insignificant I am. I was about 14.

Sorry to hear all the unpleasant comments that have stuck with people. I have had some of those but the words someone else has said that most stuck with me most strongly are ‘you’ve got to hydrate before you caffeinate,’ said to me by a nice but hardly known to me boy who I went to school with. Almost every time I have a coffee I have a glass of water first and have quite a clear memory of someone I would otherwise completely have forgotten!

I also have a nicer version of the looks comments - I was a very awkward teenager, thought I was very ugly and odd looking, with a too big nose etc. A friend’s very cool and bohemian parents and their friends, who were all actors and artists, had a brief (non creepy!) conversation about what a ‘wonderful’ face I had, and it completely changed the way I saw myself. I still didn’t feel ‘pretty’ but felt that there were other ways to look nice or interesting. Looking back I assume they knew exactly what they were doing!

As a very mature first time mum, was v self conscious about it. Doctor was lovely and said if you're still having periods your body thinks you can have babies and being older doesn't automatically mean problems.

When younger, informed by boss I made Mary in ' something about Mary' look intelligent.

“When are you gonna grow some tits?”

He was my best friend’s mum’s lodger / boyfriend - a revolting fat, sweaty, smelly, lazy middle aged man who sat around in his vile grubby dressing gown all day every day.

I was 8.

He was at the top of the stairs, I was at the bottom. Friend’s mum just giggled.

He eventually got extradited to his home country after being arrested for abusing my friend. It was me who had taken her to the police station to report him. The adults around us did nothing.

Trying to forget horrible things people have said so I always hold on to this one.
After struggling so much through the toddler years as my daughter really embraced the 'terrible twos' stage which lasted about 3 years and everyone's comments and advice seemed to blame me.
Then at a parent teacher meeting when she was 5 and the teacher said to me 'You've done a wonderful job with her' I swear I nearly burst into tears. Love that woman to this day.

3 days pp and my milk was coming in but my breasts were so painful and breastfeeding was so hard I was sat in bed sobbing at 2am.

DH sat up put his arm around me and said you're doing such an amazing job I'm so proud of you 💓

It gave me so much more determination and encouragement.

My second husband was widowed young ( 38). He is now 60. He often says to me " If I go first then miss me a bit but spend the money, have a ball and live your best life". If he goes first I shall try very hard to do just that

My Aunt, who turned to me on my wedding day and said “You’d never have had all this if your Dad was still alive - he always said you spent money like water”.
Bitter old cow. And we paid for most of the day ourselves.

Not me but my best friend at secondary school. We were having our break snacks in the PE changing rooms before changing. PE teacher ( female) walked through and said to my friend " Stop eating that you're getting fat". I have no doubt that triggered years and years of issues.

My exh during our divorce said to me “no one has ever liked you. That’s why you have no friends. No one we know has ever liked you.” He was right as they all sided with him ( he was having an affair) and I was left with twins under a year old and just my sister’s for support. I struggle to make any friendships now as I hear those words every time but have accepted I am actually unlikely to have any close friends. I tried counselling but it can’t make me a nice person!

My mum had hyperemesis with all 3 of her pregnancies. I had it with my first one. When I rang her to tell her I was pregnant with my second ( went on to have hyperemesis with him too)her only comment was " Well you may as well kill yourself while you're at it ".

@XenoBitch
Measuring you up for her knife.

My ex once said to me that my stomach looked liked Freddy Krueger’s face. Need I be reminded why he’s my ex!

My elder sister telling a 14yr old me that I had a bum the size if of an elephant when I asked what clothing size she thought I was. I became that 'does my bum look big in this' woman. But then Kim Kardashian came along and now some women are having bum implants. Who knew my butt was a trailblazer all those years ago 🤣

Yes i can relate to this post, I’ve had several
things said to me in the past, things that I’ve never been able to forget. Two things in particular come to mind that made me wonder why they was said, was by my ex parter (my son & daughter’s dad).

As a family, we was out once at a fair with DC, they were much younger then. I’d not been feeling all that well, but decided to make the effort and go out to let DS and DD enjoy themselves at the fair. Anyway, me and my ex wasn’t really getting on all that well, we’d been going through a bad patch and most of the time he enjoyed saying unkind things to me, randomly or in the heat of the moment. He truly is a pig! Anyway, I’d been coughing a lot all day, the effects from a bad chest infection and at one point during that day, he turned to me while our DC we’re on a ride and said so nastily, ‘can’t you just f* die quietly’ . He then looked me up and down in disgust and walked off to the other side of the ride our DC was on. He didn’t joke or laugh it off, like he was joking, he meant it. I was so hurt and upset, but held it in for the babbies sakes. Not long after I ended things in another heated discussion.

Another time her told me he actually enjoyed being mean to me, and that I wasn’t worthy of him being nice cause he gets his kicks being a horrible person towards me. Again he said this to me in a vicious nasty way. I was again very hurt.

Yes he’s an ex for many reasons of. I endured 8 years of mental abuse. He made me feel absolutely worthless and told me
no one would ever love me having two kids by him. That no one will find me attractive or worth anything. Shame, cause I didn’t nothing but love him, care for him, help him through bad times, supported him financially. Toxic bloke, toxic relationship and them hurtful words he’s said have never faded from my mind.

I was 15. A boy I really fancied at the youth club, said to me "I saw you in church on Sunday." I was desperately trying to remember what I had been wearing when he continued. "Your sister gets prettier every day."

She was 10!

My mum to me when I continued to breastfeed my child after 6 months: "You need to ask yourself, if you are doing this for her, or for yourself". Yeah cos I'm so emotionally needy and breastfeeding is SUCH fun. Thanks mum. 🙄

Reading through these and so many mums say such horrible things.
My mum told me I was no oil painting. I was 13 or 14, it really knocked any confidence I had.

My H on seeing that I was looking round at external jobs aged 56 after working alongside him for many years (and right after I found out about an old emotional affair) said 'why are you doing that? Who would want you?

He did say afterwards that it came out all wrong and what he meant was because of age and the fact I hadn't worked for an organisation for 15 years as we ran our own business - - but it felt hugely hurtful after being in HR and an office manager in my past.

"Look at that anorexic girl" - a couple of 60-something women about me in the street, thinking I didn't hear them. I wasn't anorexic but did feel very insecure about my attractiveness so that didn't help.

"why did you dress up as a witch?" - member of teaching staff at my first formal dinner, wearing my first posh evening dress aged 15.

I had an awful pregnancy with my first son. Had a cesarean because he was breech and stuck. My NCT leader rang me up when he was 3 weeks old. I explained that I had had a son and said how he was born " Oh dear, never, mind, you can do it properly next time". I was sinking in to PND by then . Made it so much worse.
I could have had a cesarean with my second son but I was determined to do birth 'properly ' in her opinion. I had a dreadful birth. My coccyx fractured, my bowel stopped working for a month. He was pulled out by ventouse in the end followed by a huge number of stitches and a very purple fanny.I had to have a midwife attempt to manually evacuate the poop from my totally compacted bowel after 3 desperate weeks. That bloody woman's bloody stupid comment cost me an awful lot.

Same to you xx

And then my MIL came to visit and said " What a shame he wasn't a girl. So sad to have 2 boys". I look so ill in the photos I have no idea how she could have said that to me