Over heard in the swimming pool changing room today

[BankOfMaeve]

This made me smile so much.

Two small kids chatting to one another in the next cubicle after their swim.

they were clearly very impressed by the skills of a slightly older child.

“I think she’s a proper swimmer, she has one of those things on her head to cover her hair like they do in the Olympics, and she’s wearing a yellow band, which means she gets to stay in longer than us. She must be training for the Olympics.”

All this at a regular splash and play session in the council pool!

Some of my favourite things the dcs in our family have said over the years:

nephew aged 5 on a coach trip through a safari park “EVERYONE LOOK! It’s GIANT SQUIRREL”!!.. it was a kangaroo😀

ds age 3 when we were stuck in traffic:
ds: “why aren’t we moving mum?”
me: “we’re stuck in a traffic jam, love”
ds: (really thinking with his face screwed up) “but who’s job is it to spread the traffic jam on the road??”

another road related one - my other ds again around age 3 - asking “what those yellow boxes on poles are at the side of the motorway?” I explained about speed cameras
ds: “wow, they must be really tiny little policemen to fit in those boxes!” 🤣🤣🤣

I must have been speaking to DH in front of DD without really watching what I was saying, before I knew she was listening to everything! I dropped her at nursery and the staff member asked me something, I forget what. I said, "I don't know," and my DD said, "Mummy doesn't know squat!"

Brilliant!!!

My son, aged about 2.5 in campsite showers, "mummy, you have a VERY big beard on your willy"

I was told yesterday evening by my NDNs DS, 6, that I have boys hair because it is short...

A bright two-and-a-half-year-old once informed me: 'You know, I've got a willy! And my Daddy's got a willy! But my Mummy hasn't got a willy. She has a bottom!'

This was me. 😂I used to insist on pants on and always found him with multiple pants on ‘my penis feels cold when we’ve been swimming’ was his reply normally followed by ‘you said I had to wear pants but didn’t say only one pair!’

Us - picked up our new Labrador puppy in a puppy bag - like a fabric net carrier for the car. 2 months later very excited when we bought the baby changing bag from John Lewis for the arrival of her brother - very, very disappointed that the baby wasn’t put in the bag to go home and wasn’t zipped in it to carry around 😂

My friend was in a swimming pool cubicle with her little girl when her daughter loudly declared "mummy - why do you have a beard down there?"- She said she made her wait a while before emerging..

In mark spencer with ds3 and it was the lingerie sale. He asked " mommy do you need some new boobies cover?", very loudly

When DD was about four.
In Asdas toilets "Mummy, your bum is bleeding, we need a plaster!"
No sweetie, I don't need a plaster.
"There's blood!! You need a Hello Kitty plaster!"
I heard one snigger from the cubicle next door. She didn't come in with me after that.

This is the funniest thing I've heard in ages! 😂

@Woodendonkey My daughters have been told the correct names and I am fully comfortable discussing biology with them BUT she had just turned 2 and was making an observation. Quite a good adjective I thought!

🤣🤣

Those biff and chip books? The one with mums knickers on the washing line...
DS aged 3 or 4 announced to his teacher and class
" my mummy's knickers are bigger than that... except for the ones with no bum in"

Maybe you could recommend Elizabeth Arden cream for his cold penis, it seems to have the Royal seal of approval for such conditions.

Dd went down a slide into the pool for the first time aged 2 and screamed 'mummy I'm PEEING' as she splashed in to the water. I loudly told her no she wasn't it was just the water running out her swimsuit but I've never been entirely sure....

Not funny but sweet. My wee boy (almost 10 now) when he was tiny, would become terribly jealous if I so much as looked at any of my friends younger children, never mind held them or spoke to them. You could guarantee that whenever a younger child or baby was within arms reach, my son would be hanging around my neck. Those days are long gone 😂

I've just remember being in a communc changing room with Dd aged 4 where she started the conversation 'mummmmmmy.... you know how you said everyone is different shapes and sizes?'
Me (on high alert) 'yes but let's get changed'
Dd (appraising everyone slowly) 'which one is the square do you think?'

My DS last year aged 3;

DS: ‘mummy, am I allowed to say sake or is sake a naughty word?’

Me: ‘Sake?!? It’s not a naughty word but I can’t think of a reason you’d need to say it?’

DS: ‘To say fucks sake!’

🙈🙈
stern words were had that evening over my husband’s potty mouth!!!

That is where most of the swimming clubs train, for competitions…. The are kids too so will have “time off” to play, when I was a kid I did national competitions from age 8 local from age 7. I was doing really well until I had a leg injury which still in adulthood causes me problems. But yeah a lot of your swimmers come from nothing and spent their summers in the swimming pools! So if they kids go a lot they will have seen the teams who can end up train for Olympics 😉

Love this post. Needed this bit of light heartedness

I went in to M&S with my son two, my DD’s and my mom. We were walking through the lingerie department t get to the cafe. My son as loud as you like yells, “mommy, look it’s booby pants!” We are all creased with laughter, which unfortunately means he continues to say booby pants- loudly. Kind of accurate though. Who thought of the word bra /brassiere?

I had a really bad rash on my face and felt so self conscious about it, I was moaning about it to my husband and my son said ‘it’s fine mummy it just looks like you were born that way’ in the most casual way possible.

Rory and Abigail are legendary.