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Original poster

Was this nurse rude?

223 replies

Littlestdove · 18/02/2023 11:25

I want to preface this by saying I am in pain so that’s not helping but yesterday I went to A and E with pain under my right rib cage- I believe it could be my gallbladder as I have a polyp and both my parents have had theirs removed . It was an extreme stabbing pain that took my breath away. My blood pressure was 170/90 and I just felt awful. No temp tho.

I was given morphine and some buscopan and then told they couldn’t ultrasound my gallbladder until the morning so they’d send me home with strong painkillers and to come back to A and E if my ultrasound showed any stones and the polyp.

So que to this morning, I’ve been up all night in agony trying to make it through to my ultrasound. Ultrasound shows stone and polyp. I rebook into A and E and first thing the nurse triaging says is

”back again? You’ve been in no end lately”

so I said, well yes I was in yesterday and told to rebook in if I was still in pain and my ultrasound showed a stone and polyp.

”You do know you can see your GP for Abdominal issues?”

and I said yes, I realise that however it was a sudden intense pain

”Well I’m just letting you know for further information”

meh. I’m sat here in pain and now just feel like a time waster.

OP posts:
Goodread1 · 20/02/2023 09:49

@abmac95

You sound like you either come from a medical background in some way, ?

just wondering are you?

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 10:00

SirChenjins · 20/02/2023 09:42

You have only talked about the the nurse getting the sack or getting fired, no other forms of disciplinary action - it’s there in black and white ie “If you fired everyone who wasn’t happy doing their job all the time or who occasionally made pointed remarks then soon there would be no-one left” and “Well good luck getting anyone to work there or having any staff left in that case, if you think this is a sackable offence”.

What I actually said was “Giving out incorrect medical advice because you cba to read the patient’s notes is indicative of incompetence - if you’re not able to do that simple task and put the patient at risk then you shouldn’t be in the profession”. I stand by that - it’s not the job for you if you can’t bring yourself to listen to what the patient is telling you or read their notes so you don’t confuse them with another patient or give them misinformation. Perhaps the nurse should think about whether a triage role in A&E is the right one for her. I have also said that there are other forms of disciplinary action on more than one occasion.

Show quote history

You and another poster I have replied to have been talking about both the nurse being disciplined and also, seperately, implied that she should no longer be working in the NHS but nowhere did I say that disciplinary = the sack. That's you taking two things I have said separately and conflating them.

You didn't say that the nurse should think about applying for a different role - you said she 'shouldn't be in the profession'. I think anyone reading that would assume that is calling for her to either be sacked or to quit (and no-one is going to think the latter is at all likely). I'm glad that you've clarified it though and that you're presumably agreeing that sacking her would be too much. Personally I think that any disciplinary measure would be an over-reaction too, but that's just my own opinion.

Bippetyboppityboob · 20/02/2023 10:02

However well intentioned the nurse was can absolutely see how it comes across as rude and inappropriate. That said I wouldn't see it as something to make a complaint about personally, although of course your choice.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General health
BellePeppa · 20/02/2023 10:58

Probably the best thing to do, if the opportunity arose, would be to update that particular nurse on the situation and politely tell her to not be so presumptive and insensitive as people in pain feel vulnerable and worried. If you look at patient facing job adverts for the nhs it will usually say must be sensitive to patients needs etc - I’m pretty sure it alludes to it in their mission statement (I used to work in admin in nhs).

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 11:03

Maybe 100 lines after her shift.

I must not be rude to patients.
I must not be rude to patients.
I must not be rude to patients.
I must not be rude to patients.

Xol · 20/02/2023 11:04

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 09:01

She didn't 'continue to push it' - she made one more remark about telling her for further information, which sounds much more to me like back-tracking than anything else.

I'll say it again, if you genuinely think that this nurse should no longer be working in the NHS based on this one single interaction then your expectations of them are far too high. They are already doing an incredibly difficult and important job under increasing pressure - demanding perfection will just cause more of them to leave and then things will be even worse.

Show quote history

She was pushing it when she said to OP "You do know you can see your GP for Abdominal issues?” having been told by OP that she'd been specifically told to come back to A&E. When OP then told her she had come in due to sudden and intense pain, she was definitely continuing to push it with the "I'm just letting you know" nonsense as she had no reason to believe that OP didn't already know.

Where exactly do you imagine I have said I thought the nurse should no longer be working in the NHS?

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 11:15

Xol · 20/02/2023 11:04

She was pushing it when she said to OP "You do know you can see your GP for Abdominal issues?” having been told by OP that she'd been specifically told to come back to A&E. When OP then told her she had come in due to sudden and intense pain, she was definitely continuing to push it with the "I'm just letting you know" nonsense as she had no reason to believe that OP didn't already know.

Where exactly do you imagine I have said I thought the nurse should no longer be working in the NHS?

Show quote history

Sorry, that's my mistake - you replied to my reply to someone elses post where they said that we didn't need nurses like her in the NHS and I thought you were the original replier.

Fair enough - your definition of pushing it is clearly different to mine, which is fine, so I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 11:25

Clearly, there’s no way she should have been saying nonsense like “you know you can go to your GP for pain like this”, when in actual fact the doctor had told her to go back, and then booked her in for emergency surgery.

Obviously not something that a GP could have dealt with.

So the nurse was wrong. Dangerously wrong.

However, you know, she works for the NHS so she must be an angel.

MissWings · 20/02/2023 12:06

@Sep200024

It is quite well known within the profession it certainly attracts a few bad eggs. There’s a lot of power in nursing over the patient. I believe many go into for the right reasons but I agree, they’re certainty not all angels, far from it.

SirChenjins · 20/02/2023 15:40

Oh, they are definitely not all angels. I’ve worked in the NHS for over 30 years and my DD is a nurse - the stories I (and she) could tell you would shock you. Equally, there are brilliant nurses in the profession who treat their patients with dignity and respect and who take the time to read their notes before giving advice and making a clinically informed decision about the best course of treatment.

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 15:58

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 11:25

Clearly, there’s no way she should have been saying nonsense like “you know you can go to your GP for pain like this”, when in actual fact the doctor had told her to go back, and then booked her in for emergency surgery.

Obviously not something that a GP could have dealt with.

So the nurse was wrong. Dangerously wrong.

However, you know, she works for the NHS so she must be an angel.

No, not an angel, but if this is the worst thing she has done then I'd still prefer to be treated by her than by nobody at all. Seems others would prefer to take their chances with some kind of self-service healthcare though.

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 16:01

But we don’t know anything else about her.

No idea whether this is the only bad thing she’s done or whether she’s always terrible.

The judgement therefore is just for this one situation.

In this situation she was a dangerously poor nurse.

SirChenjins · 20/02/2023 16:01

Is that really how low your expectations of the NHS are?

I’d rather have nurses (and other healthcare professionals) who are able to do the basic elements of their jobs correctly.

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 16:08

SirChenjins · 20/02/2023 16:01

Is that really how low your expectations of the NHS are?

I’d rather have nurses (and other healthcare professionals) who are able to do the basic elements of their jobs correctly.

Well yes, clearly I would like the best possible people too, but clearly the NHS is having problems hanging on to anyone, good or not, so currently we can either wish all we want or we can deal with reality as it presents itself.

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 16:09

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 16:01

But we don’t know anything else about her.

No idea whether this is the only bad thing she’s done or whether she’s always terrible.

The judgement therefore is just for this one situation.

In this situation she was a dangerously poor nurse.

Yes, and as I said, my judgement here is based on this one situation and I still think that it's better to be treated by her than by no-one at all, which seems to be the way the NHS is currently heading.

eatsleeprepeat123 · 20/02/2023 16:14

I don't get why the a&e staff told you to go back to a&e if they found gallstones on the scan? As a&e won't remove it there and then. But sounds like you did as told so I'm not saying this nurse was right with what she said! Just seems a bit odd on their part.

When I ended up in a&e with severe gallstone pain I too had to go back the next day for a scan where they confirmed I had gallstones. Then the doctor I saw after the scan put me on the waitlist for removal. No return to a&e.

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 16:16

Doesn’t make sense. That nurse didn’t want the OP to be there.

If OP had been any sort of vulnerable patient who may be unable to think critically for themselves, and therefore place their entire faith in what the healthcare staff tell them, then she may have gone home. She may have died.

So literally would have been better off with no nurse than that nurse.

eatsleeprepeat123 · 20/02/2023 16:18

Just read your update and saw you were having it removed today due to a polyp as well!

Hope the op went well and wishing you a speedy recovery.

SirChenjins · 20/02/2023 16:18

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 16:08

Well yes, clearly I would like the best possible people too, but clearly the NHS is having problems hanging on to anyone, good or not, so currently we can either wish all we want or we can deal with reality as it presents itself.

Show quote history

Or we can deal with issues of poor/dangerous practice when they arise and protect the patients first and foremost. The NHS isn’t there to put patients at risk because a nurse cba to do their job properly.

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 16:34

SirChenjins · 20/02/2023 16:18

Or we can deal with issues of poor/dangerous practice when they arise and protect the patients first and foremost. The NHS isn’t there to put patients at risk because a nurse cba to do their job properly.

Show quote history

I too like to indulge my fantasies from time to time, but I'm usually forced to operate in the real world and deal with things as they exist, rather than as I would like them to be.

You say you work for the NHS (but not as a nurse or presumably in a clinical role) - you have seen the number of vacancies and how that number is going up rather than down surely? We don't have the luxury of being able to choose your option here - at least not to the standards you seem to want (and I'm not saying those standards are wrong - just that they aren't practical right now).

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 16:35

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 16:16

Doesn’t make sense. That nurse didn’t want the OP to be there.

If OP had been any sort of vulnerable patient who may be unable to think critically for themselves, and therefore place their entire faith in what the healthcare staff tell them, then she may have gone home. She may have died.

So literally would have been better off with no nurse than that nurse.

What, so she'd have been better of wandering around the hospital looking for someone to treat her because there was no-one there to do triage? OK then.

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 16:39

Well yes. Because the nurse who did triage wanted to send her home. So then she’d be dead.

Wandering around the hospital probably a better option.

WheelOfFish · 20/02/2023 16:40

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 16:39

Well yes. Because the nurse who did triage wanted to send her home. So then she’d be dead.

Wandering around the hospital probably a better option.

And if everyone did that? Because there is still no-one to do triage?

SirChenjins · 20/02/2023 16:42

It’s not a luxury and it’s not reality - you really need to stop this negative thinking of yours. Unless patients highlight this type of serious failing in clinical practice managers cannot step in and deal with them. Patient safety always come first - this wasn’t an accident, this was a nurse who made a conscious decision not to treat the patient with dignity and respect and not to read their notes before dispensing advice that was clinically incorrect and potentially dangerous.

Sep200024 · 20/02/2023 16:42

Despite the fact that is obviously a very poor system, patients would still have more chance of being treated that way than they would if they are blocked from entry by a incompetent triage nurse.